JuanGuzman Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I have a really attractive girlfriend, this is unique for me. Its not that I normally date ugly girls, its just that I usually happen to date middle of the pack girls. (6's or 7s) girls who are decent looking (e.g. okay/good looking but usually not the hottest girls in the room) But with my new GF (dating for about six months and the new car smell is starting to wear off so to speak) I humbly suggest I am a little out of my league. She fits the category of "The Hot Girl", all the guys at her workplace drool over her including one who I think has crossed the line, and when we are out its not uncommon to see guys blatantly checking her out or making obvious passes. To add to my trouble she enjoys the flattery & being at the center of attention - she dresses sexy, spends a lot of time getting ready always trying to look her best and is herself quite bubbly/flirty with most people. As any red blooded male this is starting to get on nerves a bit, I have strictly avoided playing the jealousy card (even though that jealousy probably expresses what I am feeling to a tee) getting jealous or bitchy would make me look insecure. My current strategy is to feign ignorance and trying to make her good friends and co-workers think I'm a cool guy, you know like an everyman/ backslapper politician who is real easy going. Obviously I know feeling sympathy for a guy who posts at a message board claiming: "woe is me I am dating a hot girl, and I just don't know what to do". But I prefer you think of me as a die hard bills fan who recently just happened to luck out and date a really attractive GF, I want to keep this going like a run in vegas or something. Also feel free to flame/insult away as any post this lame deserves more than a few verbal barbs, but if anyone has decent advice feel free to contribute. So far my my ideas have been fairly simple e.g pre-emptive break up (George Costanza), start being a dick to everyone she works with/under cutting them by picking out their flaws and making fun of them when they are not around (not my personality but I can put on a facade), or just start blatantly flirting more with her GFs or some my friends that are girls and see if that does anything. thanks.
DC Tom Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I have a really attractive girlfriend, this is unique for me. Its not that I normally date ugly girls, its just that I usually happen to date middle of the pack girls. (6's or 7s) girls who are decent looking (e.g. okay/good looking but usually not the hottest girls in the room) But with my new GF (dating for about six months and the new car smell is starting to wear off so to speak) I humbly suggest I am a little out of my league. She fits the category of "The Hot Girl", all the guys at her workplace drool over her including one who I think has crossed the line, and when we are out its not uncommon to see guys blatantly checking her out or making obvious passes. To add to my trouble she enjoys the flattery & being at the center of attention - she dresses sexy, spends a lot of time getting ready always trying to look her best and is herself quite bubbly/flirty with most people. As any red blooded male this is starting to get on nerves a bit, I have strictly avoided playing the jealousy card (even though that jealousy probably expresses what I am feeling to a tee) getting jealous or bitchy would make me look insecure. My current strategy is to feign ignorance and trying to make her good friends and co-workers think I'm a cool guy, you know like an everyman/ backslapper politician who is real easy going. Obviously I know feeling sympathy for a guy who posts at a message board claiming: "woe is me I am dating a hot girl, and I just don't know what to do". But I prefer you think of me as a die hard bills fan who recently just happened to luck out and date a really attractive GF, I want to keep this going like a run in vegas or something. Also feel free to flame/insult away as any post this lame deserves more than a few verbal barbs, but if anyone has decent advice feel free to contribute. So far my my ideas have been fairly simple e.g pre-emptive break up (George Costanza), start being a dick to everyone she works with/under cutting them by picking out their flaws and making fun of them when they are not around (not my personality but I can put on a facade), or just start blatantly flirting more with her GFs or some my friends that are girls and see if that does anything. thanks. So let me get this straight: you're dating a woman other men want, but she chooses to be with you? And this is a problem because...?
H2o Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I have a really attractive girlfriend, this is unique for me. Its not that I normally date ugly girls, its just that I usually happen to date middle of the pack girls. (6's or 7s) girls who are decent looking (e.g. okay/good looking but usually not the hottest girls in the room) But with my new GF (dating for about six months and the new car smell is starting to wear off so to speak) I humbly suggest I am a little out of my league. She fits the category of "The Hot Girl", all the guys at her workplace drool over her including one who I think has crossed the line, and when we are out its not uncommon to see guys blatantly checking her out or making obvious passes. To add to my trouble she enjoys the flattery & being at the center of attention - she dresses sexy, spends a lot of time getting ready always trying to look her best and is herself quite bubbly/flirty with most people. As any red blooded male this is starting to get on nerves a bit, I have strictly avoided playing the jealousy card (even though that jealousy probably expresses what I am feeling to a tee) getting jealous or bitchy would make me look insecure. My current strategy is to feign ignorance and trying to make her good friends and co-workers think I'm a cool guy, you know like an everyman/ backslapper politician who is real easy going. Obviously I know feeling sympathy for a guy who posts at a message board claiming: "woe is me I am dating a hot girl, and I just don't know what to do". But I prefer you think of me as a die hard bills fan who recently just happened to luck out and date a really attractive GF, I want to keep this going like a run in vegas or something. Also feel free to flame/insult away as any post this lame deserves more than a few verbal barbs, but if anyone has decent advice feel free to contribute. So far my my ideas have been fairly simple e.g pre-emptive break up (George Costanza), start being a dick to everyone she works with/under cutting them by picking out their flaws and making fun of them when they are not around (not my personality but I can put on a facade), or just start blatantly flirting more with her GFs or some my friends that are girls and see if that does anything. thanks. She obviously likes you for reasons you most likely know. Don't start getting insecure and losing confidence in yourself. Girls usually aren't into guys like that and if they smell it they usually walk shortly there after. I don't care who you are or what you rate your woman, whether it be a 7 or a 10, there WILL BE other guys who want them. It's just life. Do your best to keep things new and exciting. Do things to make her feel special. It's the little things most of the time that they tell us about themselves that if you show her you remember them it really goes a long way. Things like specific flowers she likes, or surprise her with a trip to a place she's been talking about, and any other little things you can think of. Never forget to look into her eyes and tell her how you feel about her. Don't take her for granted in any way.
Steve O Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 [i have strictly avoided playing the jealousy card (even though that jealousy probably expresses what I am feeling to a tee) getting jealous or bitchy would make me look insecure. [/b] Playing this correct My current strategy is to feign ignorance and trying to make her good friends and co-workers think I'm a cool guy, you know like an everyman/ backslapper politician who is real easy going. If this is you then fine but if it isn't how long will you be able to keep it up? I don't think it is or you wouldn't have posted in the first place so... just start blatantly flirting more with her GFs or some my friends that are girls and see if that does anything. Not sure about blatantly but ignore her for a couple hours when you go out and socialize with girls and guys. Good luck
KD in CA Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 **sigh** link please? If we're going to provide informed advice, we really need to see for ourselves.
/dev/null Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 **sigh** link please? If we're going to provide informed advice, we really need to see for ourselves. qft
Whites Bay Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 To H2O's point, I know it's corny as hell, but flowers are KILLER. I don't know why women like this so much, but they do, so like the salmon swimming upstream, I just "do", I don't "think". Another thing I used to do when I was a-courtin', was to make sure my (now-wife) had extra pillows in her hotel room on a business trip. Because she liked it, that's all. Simple stuff, actually. Staying in the Hilton, baby? Call the damn Hilton, ask for housekeeping, tell them to put extra pillows on the bed. 25 years now. "Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road" - Louden Wainwright III
ans4e64 Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 Your choices are very simple. They are: 1.) Stop being a drama queen and deal with it. or 2.) Go back to dating 6's. Your choice.
Beerball Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I have a really attractive girlfriend, this is unique for me. Its not that I normally date ugly girls, its just that I usually happen to date middle of the pack girls. (6's or 7s) girls who are decent looking (e.g. okay/good looking but usually not the hottest girls in the room) But with my new GF (dating for about six months and the new car smell is starting to wear off so to speak) I humbly suggest I am a little out of my league. She fits the category of "The Hot Girl", all the guys at her workplace drool over her including one who I think has crossed the line, and when we are out its not uncommon to see guys blatantly checking her out or making obvious passes. To add to my trouble she enjoys the flattery & being at the center of attention - she dresses sexy, spends a lot of time getting ready always trying to look her best and is herself quite bubbly/flirty with most people. As any red blooded male this is starting to get on nerves a bit, I have strictly avoided playing the jealousy card (even though that jealousy probably expresses what I am feeling to a tee) getting jealous or bitchy would make me look insecure. My current strategy is to feign ignorance and trying to make her good friends and co-workers think I'm a cool guy, you know like an everyman/ backslapper politician who is real easy going. Obviously I know feeling sympathy for a guy who posts at a message board claiming: "woe is me I am dating a hot girl, and I just don't know what to do". But I prefer you think of me as a die hard bills fan who recently just happened to luck out and date a really attractive GF, I want to keep this going like a run in vegas or something. Also feel free to flame/insult away as any post this lame deserves more than a few verbal barbs, but if anyone has decent advice feel free to contribute. So far my my ideas have been fairly simple e.g pre-emptive break up (George Costanza), start being a dick to everyone she works with/under cutting them by picking out their flaws and making fun of them when they are not around (not my personality but I can put on a facade), or just start blatantly flirting more with her GFs or some my friends that are girls and see if that does anything. thanks. Send a PM to crayonz, he'll be able to give you some good advice.
Acantha Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I didn't read much of your post, but from the title, there's only one answer: Treat her like crap.
Stl Bills Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I didn't read much of your post, but from the title, there's only one answer: Treat her like crap.
Tcali Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I have a really attractive girlfriend, this is unique for me. Its not that I normally date ugly girls, its just that I usually happen to date middle of the pack girls. (6's or 7s) girls who are decent looking (e.g. okay/good looking but usually not the hottest girls in the room) But with my new GF (dating for about six months and the new car smell is starting to wear off so to speak) I humbly suggest I am a little out of my league. She fits the category of "The Hot Girl", all the guys at her workplace drool over her including one who I think has crossed the line, and when we are out its not uncommon to see guys blatantly checking her out or making obvious passes. To add to my trouble she enjoys the flattery & being at the center of attention - she dresses sexy, spends a lot of time getting ready always trying to look her best and is herself quite bubbly/flirty with most people. As any red blooded male this is starting to get on nerves a bit, I have strictly avoided playing the jealousy card (even though that jealousy probably expresses what I am feeling to a tee) getting jealous or bitchy would make me look insecure. My current strategy is to feign ignorance and trying to make her good friends and co-workers think I'm a cool guy, you know like an everyman/ backslapper politician who is real easy going. Obviously I know feeling sympathy for a guy who posts at a message board claiming: "woe is me I am dating a hot girl, and I just don't know what to do". But I prefer you think of me as a die hard bills fan who recently just happened to luck out and date a really attractive GF, I want to keep this going like a run in vegas or something. Also feel free to flame/insult away as any post this lame deserves more than a few verbal barbs, but if anyone has decent advice feel free to contribute. So far my my ideas have been fairly simple e.g pre-emptive break up (George Costanza), start being a dick to everyone she works with/under cutting them by picking out their flaws and making fun of them when they are not around (not my personality but I can put on a facade), or just start blatantly flirting more with her GFs or some my friends that are girls and see if that does anything. thanks. hey i was in the same situation......25 yrs ago...If you dont really like her and you are just dating her because she is hot.....then get rid of her ASAP. It won't end well.--I am assuming you are in your 20s.
Gordio Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I have a really attractive girlfriend, this is unique for me. Its not that I normally date ugly girls, its just that I usually happen to date middle of the pack girls. (6's or 7s) girls who are decent looking (e.g. okay/good looking but usually not the hottest girls in the room) But with my new GF (dating for about six months and the new car smell is starting to wear off so to speak) I humbly suggest I am a little out of my league. She fits the category of "The Hot Girl", all the guys at her workplace drool over her including one who I think has crossed the line, and when we are out its not uncommon to see guys blatantly checking her out or making obvious passes. To add to my trouble she enjoys the flattery & being at the center of attention - she dresses sexy, spends a lot of time getting ready always trying to look her best and is herself quite bubbly/flirty with most people. As any red blooded male this is starting to get on nerves a bit, I have strictly avoided playing the jealousy card (even though that jealousy probably expresses what I am feeling to a tee) getting jealous or bitchy would make me look insecure. My current strategy is to feign ignorance and trying to make her good friends and co-workers think I'm a cool guy, you know like an everyman/ backslapper politician who is real easy going. Obviously I know feeling sympathy for a guy who posts at a message board claiming: "woe is me I am dating a hot girl, and I just don't know what to do". But I prefer you think of me as a die hard bills fan who recently just happened to luck out and date a really attractive GF, I want to keep this going like a run in vegas or something. Also feel free to flame/insult away as any post this lame deserves more than a few verbal barbs, but if anyone has decent advice feel free to contribute. So far my my ideas have been fairly simple e.g pre-emptive break up (George Costanza), start being a dick to everyone she works with/under cutting them by picking out their flaws and making fun of them when they are not around (not my personality but I can put on a facade), or just start blatantly flirting more with her GFs or some my friends that are girls and see if that does anything. thanks. It all depends on what your looking for right now. If your just looking for that late night booty call when you get home drunk from the bar I say leave things status quo. It sounds like you kinda like this girl(more then just the looks) or you probably would not be getting jealous. Here is my advice to you, no girl is worth getting jealous over. I know I am married now & are little older then you(36) but take it from me, there are plenty of girls out there especially for a 25/26 year old single guy. If it is bothering you now, it is only going to get worse, & if this is the case I would probably break up with her. Plus if she is that flirty right in front of you it is only a matter of time before she starts cheating on you. I say beat her to the punch, pork her best friend. Oh yeah, before you do that, I would pork her one last time too.
Stl Bills Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 You can't trust girls that are OVERLY flirty with other guys.....that's just common sense. I'm not a jealous guy by any stretch of the imagination, but then again my gf doesn't give me any reason to be jealous. Sure she has a lot of guy friends and I get along with all of them as does she with my girl friends. I'm just saying, we don't hide anything from each other and that's how I know I can trust her. If your not just one of those "overly jealous" guys and you still find yourself not feeling totally confident with your position in your relationship, then she's probably not doing a good enough job of not making you feel like you are the only one she wants. I think it would piss just about any guy off if their gf was openly flirty with other guys. I'm just saying, where there is smoke there is fire.....maybe not now but someday.
drinkTHEkoolaid Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 if you think you are a rational calm non jelous type, and you find yourself getting jelous there might be a red flag going off to feel that way. but mix up the treating her like crap and treating her like a princess. make sure she knows that you dont NEED her, keep her on her toes, keep her wanting more from you dont give her everything she wants. but mix that up with doing nice things for her and pampering her. a'la suprising her, flowers, do nice things on occasion to let her know you are thinking about her etc.. but dont OVER do it. if you bow down to her and give her everything she wants and bend over backwards, eventually she will not respect that and will walk all over you becasue she will know she can. dont be afraid to stick up for yourself and sand up when the situation warrants it. because if you dont respect and stick up for yourself when you are right, you are comprimising your values because you want a "hot girl" and you will regre it if things end badly. and in her mind she will rationalize that if you cant stand up for yourself, how will you stand up for her.
Alaska Darin Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 If I were you I'd hit the weights. Get your testosterone level above your estrogen.
Spun Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I would avoid taking her to bars. Flirty is usually bad especially if the flees don't fly away. Find other places for the two of you to enjoy each others company. Take her to classy places (wine and dine?) where the gawking is at a minimum. If she insists on the bar scene, you may have a problem. Be careful about the jealousy thing as it usually is the recipe for losing what you have. Don't act like a guy who normally dates 6s and 7s. Act like you always date 10s. You are doing something right. Maybe it is that so far you are being yourself and you aren't overbearing with controlling her. But don't let yourself be taken for granted. Maintain your pride and respect. More than anything you can get from this board, what is she telling you? Good luck!
buckeyemike Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 When dating a hot girl, the first rule is: CALM DOWN. There are many other fish in the sea. If you have one now, you will have another one later if this one doesn't work out. You obviously did something right to get this one. When Kim and I were first dating, I remember there being another guy who was interested in her. I believe he even asked her out while we were dating. Ultimately, she wasn't interested in him. I kept my thoughts to myself on the situation, appeared cool and collected, did not overreact and guess what happened? The threat passed. Kim and I have been together 12 years and will celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary on September 11.
Stl Bills Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 I would avoid taking her to bars. Flirty is usually bad especially if the flees don't fly away. Find other places for the two of you to enjoy each others company. Take her to classy places (wine and dine?) where the gawking is at a minimum. If she insists on the bar scene, you may have a problem. Be careful about the jealousy thing as it usually is the recipe for losing what you have. Don't act like a guy who normally dates 6s and 7s. Act like you always date 10s. You are doing something right. Maybe it is that so far you are being yourself and you aren't overbearing with controlling her. But don't let yourself be taken for granted. Maintain your pride and respect. More than anything you can get from this board, what is she telling you? Good luck! You can't avoid taking her places, that's not going to solve anything....if you got a hot gf, guys are going to check her out.....period. I actually kind of like the fact that guys check out my gf, there is something satisfying in it..... Anyway, the problem is is that his gf seems to like the fact that she's being hit on and might be overly flirty with these dudes. Thats a major red flag IMO.
DrDawkinstein Posted July 3, 2009 Posted July 3, 2009 some good advice in this thread so far. with regards to the jealousy from other guys checking her out/hitting on her... thats one of the perks of dating a hot girl. everyone else wants her and she's going home with you. dont sweat it or get jealous. the SECOND you say something about it (the casual checking out by strangers) its over. however, there is a fine line to walk when it comes to coworkers or people she has contact with everyday. but it cant be YOU who decides if/when they cross the line. you cant do anything about it until/unless SHE comes to you with "Larry pretended to reach for a pencil today and grabbed my chest", and even then all you can do is ask her "do i need to talk to Larry?" dont go do anything on your own that may embarrass her around the office. but until that happens, just sit back and enjoy the fact that every other dude is pissed off that a girl like that is with a chump like you. just play it cool. most guys screw things up by saying or doing something one step past playing it cool. and all it takes is that little step. casual and cavalier bro. take 'er easy. humans naturally love the attention they get from others that find them attractive. youre not going to stop others from checking her out, and youre not going to stop her from liking it just a little. its a nice confidence boost and as long as shes still coming home with you, then there is nothing to worry about. and finally, id like to pass on the best piece of advice my father ever gave me: we were at a Buffalo Bisons game and I was about 12 years old (prime puberty). there was some ultra hot chick walking up the aisle probably in her 20s, and i was just drooling and staring. my old man turned to me and said (and this is completely out of character for him) "somewhere these is someone who is sick and tired of !@#$ that" puts it in a whole new perspective....
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