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When can you sue?????


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I can't seem to get ahold of my attorney, Jimmy Spagnola, for the life of me this morning. As you know I have called Obama's weakness a "Los Gatos" strategy. Now a major newspaper is ripping off my idea. I should probably just wait for Jimmy, but do any of your lawyers know how much coin I can get out of this picture?

 

Obvious rip off

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I should probably just wait for Jimmy, but do any of your lawyers know how much coin I can get out of this picture?

 

Well, the average person types about 60 words per minute, and a picture is worth a thousand words...so presuming your attorney charges about $600/hr, you should expect about two hundred bucks.

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Well, the average person types about 60 words per minute, and a picture is worth a thousand words...so presuming your attorney charges about $600/hr, you should expect about two hundred bucks.

Jimmy doesn't do much typing, but I am pretty sure he can extract a little more than $200 from the idea thief that drew that picture.

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Jimmy doesn't do much typing, but I am pretty sure he can extract a little more than $200 from the idea thief that drew that picture.

 

But the legal standard isn't what your lawyer types, it's what the reasonable typing rate is for a lawyer. Even if Jimmy is a classic "hunt-and pick" two-fingered typist, he's still required to bill at 60 w.p.m., which means the picture is still only worth $200. Maybe even less - if he bills $400, you may only get $133.33333 (repeating).

 

Of course, those repeating threes add up after a while...but it's still not $200 up-front.

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But the legal standard isn't what your lawyer types, it's what the reasonable typing rate is for a lawyer. Even if Jimmy is a classic "hunt-and pick" two-fingered typist, he's still required to bill at 60 w.p.m., which means the picture is still only worth $200. Maybe even less - if he bills $400, you may only get $133.33333 (repeating).

 

Of course, those repeating threes add up after a while...but it's still not $200 up-front.

There are a couple of points that have been missed. The author is a dude by the name of Clive Crook. Don't think that won't have some weight with a jury. They will want to settle. Plus, it is written in some foreign looking paper. This probably means there is a Canadian working there somewhere.

 

All we have to do is find the Canadian and explain that with money, there can only be two digits to the right of the decimal point. This is where your repeating 3's come in handy. We just tell the Canadian that to fix the number we'll need to move the decimal point until there are only two numbers on the right. Granted it will take about a week of agony explaining the concept of "infinity" to the Canadian but if we can do it, then we are all set. We just tell him that we're willing to deal with only 25 total digits and that his company owes us:

 

$13,333,333,333,333,333,333,333.33

 

Even though we'll have to take that in Canadian it is still probably worth about a billion or two. The Canadian will think he saved his company infinity minus $13,333,333,333,333,333,333,333.33. If we can secretly plant a microphone on him we can listen to his re-explanation of the concept of infinity to his bosses as he tries to conceptualize how much money he saved them. That will be worth billions in laughs.

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There are a couple of points that have been missed. The author is a dude by the name of Clive Crook. Don't think that won't have some weight with a jury. They will want to settle. Plus, it is written in some foreign looking paper. This probably means there is a Canadian working there somewhere.

 

All we have to do is find the Canadian and explain that with money, there can only be two digits to the right of the decimal point. This is where your repeating 3's come in handy. We just tell the Canadian that to fix the number we'll need to move the decimal point until there are only two numbers on the right. Granted it will take about a week of agony explaining the concept of "infinity" to the Canadian but if we can do it, then we are all set. We just tell him that we're willing to deal with only 25 total digits and that his company owes us:

 

$13,333,333,333,333,333,333,333.33

 

Even though we'll have to take that in Canadian it is still probably worth about a billion or two. The Canadian will think he saved his company infinity minus $13,333,333,333,333,333,333,333.33. If we can secretly plant a microphone on him we can listen to his re-explanation of the concept of infinity to his bosses as he tries to conceptualize how much money he saved them. That will be worth billions in laughs.

 

That's like 222 quintillion words. I hope Jimmy Mangolia's a fast typist; it might take you months to get a settlement otherwise...

 

Although if he's an artist, he could draw 222 quadrillion pictures instead. That would be quicker.

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That's like 222 quintillion words. I hope Jimmy Mangolia's a fast typist; it might take you months to get a settlement otherwise...

 

Although if he's an artist, he could draw 222 quadrillion pictures instead. That would be quicker.

All those numbers are pretty confusing but I can tell you one thing. If I were you, I wouldn't get Jimmy's name wrong like that. Just trust me on that.

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