RayFinkle Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 Clarence Barbie: This princess Barbie is sold only at the Galleria Mall. She comes with an assortment of Coach Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a longhaired foreign dog named Courvoisier and a cookie cutter $1,000,000.00 McMansion. Available with or without tummy tuck and facelift. Workaholic Ken sold separately. Tonawanda Barbie: This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jam causing cell phone sold separately. Niagara Street Barbie: This recently paroled Barbie is available after dark and must be paid for in cash, preferably small, untraceable bills. East Aurora Barbie: This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included, are her own Starbucks cup, American Express card and Roycroft membership. Also available for this set is Artistic Ken, who has a potters wheel and no visible means of support. South Buffalo Barbie: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a Hooters t-shirt and a shamrock tattoo. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Twisted Sister CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Kens butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a Buffalo Sabres bumper sticker absolutely free. Amherst Barbie: This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available. Lackawanna Barbie: This chain-smoking, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of another Barbies house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see through halter-top. Cheektowaga version comes with a mobile home and pink flamingo. Lexington Co-op Barbie: This doll is made of actual tofu. She has multi-colored dreadlocks, unshaved armpits, no makeup and multiple piercings. Purchase Barbies new Co-op blueprints and get a free demolition permit for the pre-WWI building of your choice. Broadway/Fillmore Barbie: This model comes with a choir robes, a collection plate, a bible, and is automated. Pull the string and she raises her right hand and praises the lord. Available in four styles: Baptist, Jehovahs Witness, African-Methodist- Episcopal, and (this weeks special) Urban Storefront. Elmwood Barbie/Ken: This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts. Comes with your choice of CD: Ani DiFranco or Broadways Greatest Hits. North Buffalo Barbie/Ken: This Italian model Barbie comes only in Brunette and drives a Sunfire and has a dog or child named Bella. Ken comes with his own hair gel and gold chain with a huge cross on the end. West Seneca/Orchard Park Barbie: This Barbie comes complete with clip on hair extensions and false eyelashes. Her platform shoes come in chunky and extra chunky. Tanning bed sold separately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Poojer Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 i will take a south buffalo barbie, please Clarence Barbie: This princess Barbie is sold only at the Galleria Mall. She comes with an assortment of Coach Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a longhaired foreign dog named Courvoisier and a cookie cutter $1,000,000.00 McMansion. Available with or without tummy tuck and facelift. Workaholic Ken sold separately. Tonawanda Barbie: This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jam causing cell phone sold separately. Niagara Street Barbie: This recently paroled Barbie is available after dark and must be paid for in cash, preferably small, untraceable bills. East Aurora Barbie: This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included, are her own Starbucks cup, American Express card and Roycroft membership. Also available for this set is Artistic Ken, who has a potters wheel and no visible means of support. South Buffalo Barbie: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a Hooters t-shirt and a shamrock tattoo. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Twisted Sister CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Kens butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a Buffalo Sabres bumper sticker absolutely free. Amherst Barbie: This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available. Lackawanna Barbie: This chain-smoking, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of another Barbies house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see through halter-top. Cheektowaga version comes with a mobile home and pink flamingo. Lexington Co-op Barbie: This doll is made of actual tofu. She has multi-colored dreadlocks, unshaved armpits, no makeup and multiple piercings. Purchase Barbies new Co-op blueprints and get a free demolition permit for the pre-WWI building of your choice. Broadway/Fillmore Barbie: This model comes with a choir robes, a collection plate, a bible, and is automated. Pull the string and she raises her right hand and praises the lord. Available in four styles: Baptist, Jehovahs Witness, African-Methodist- Episcopal, and (this weeks special) Urban Storefront. Elmwood Barbie/Ken: This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts. Comes with your choice of CD: Ani DiFranco or Broadways Greatest Hits. North Buffalo Barbie/Ken: This Italian model Barbie comes only in Brunette and drives a Sunfire and has a dog or child named Bella. Ken comes with his own hair gel and gold chain with a huge cross on the end. West Seneca/Orchard Park Barbie: This Barbie comes complete with clip on hair extensions and false eyelashes. Her platform shoes come in chunky and extra chunky. Tanning bed sold separately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wacka Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 Where's the Cheektowaga Barbie? Sorry, see Lackawana Barbie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stuckincincy Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 I want a Tanya H. North Tonawanda Barbie. We will live in Section 8 housing, every conceivable expense - rent, heat, food, medical care, transportation, phone, cable, will be extracted out of the taxpayer's hide. We will work part-time at jobs that require no thought and as long as we don't visually expel drool, and our employer will greatfully cash the government (taxpayer) subsidy checks to employ our sorry hides. We aim to earn 15K per year, which will pay for our our weekly booze, nd cig needs, and have a party when we cash our earned income credit and stimulus checks. We will attend free training throughout the year in this or that skill we don't give a damn about, so we can keep the free gravy flowing. We promise to re-elect our seated politicians. Maybe we will hatch little Kens and Barbies. The free money will really flow then! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
damj Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 I want a Tanya H. North Tonawanda Barbie. We will live in Section 8 housing, every conceivable expense - rent, heat, food, medical care, transportation, phone, cable, will be extracted out of the taxpayer's hide. We will work part-time at jobs that require no thought and as long as we don't visually expel drool, and our employer will greatfully cash the government (taxpayer) subsidy checks to employ our sorry hides. We aim to earn 15K per year, which will pay for our our weekly booze, nd cig needs, and have a party when we cash our earned income credit and stimulus checks. We will attend free training throughout the year in this or that skill we don't give a damn about, so we can keep the free gravy flowing. We promise to re-elect our seated politicians. Maybe we will hatch little Kens and Barbies. The free money will really flow then! Sounds like Niagara Falls Barbie ... Comes with optional diploma or GED option. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buffaloaggie Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 Niagara Street Barbie: This recently paroled Barbie is available after dark and must be paid for in cash, preferably small, untraceable bills. Pimpin' Ken and Meth lab kit sold separately Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuffaloBill Posted June 18, 2009 Share Posted June 18, 2009 Pimpin' Ken and Meth lab kit sold separately Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tcali Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 Clarence Barbie: This princess Barbie is sold only at the Galleria Mall. She comes with an assortment of Coach Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a longhaired foreign dog named Courvoisier and a cookie cutter $1,000,000.00 McMansion. Available with or without tummy tuck and facelift. Workaholic Ken sold separately. Tonawanda Barbie: This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jam causing cell phone sold separately. Niagara Street Barbie: This recently paroled Barbie is available after dark and must be paid for in cash, preferably small, untraceable bills. East Aurora Barbie: This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included, are her own Starbucks cup, American Express card and Roycroft membership. Also available for this set is Artistic Ken, who has a potters wheel and no visible means of support. South Buffalo Barbie: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a Hooters t-shirt and a shamrock tattoo. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Twisted Sister CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Kens butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a Buffalo Sabres bumper sticker absolutely free. Amherst Barbie: This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available. Lackawanna Barbie: This chain-smoking, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of another Barbies house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see through halter-top. Cheektowaga version comes with a mobile home and pink flamingo. Lexington Co-op Barbie: This doll is made of actual tofu. She has multi-colored dreadlocks, unshaved armpits, no makeup and multiple piercings. Purchase Barbies new Co-op blueprints and get a free demolition permit for the pre-WWI building of your choice. Broadway/Fillmore Barbie: This model comes with a choir robes, a collection plate, a bible, and is automated. Pull the string and she raises her right hand and praises the lord. Available in four styles: Baptist, Jehovahs Witness, African-Methodist- Episcopal, and (this weeks special) Urban Storefront. Elmwood Barbie/Ken: This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts. Comes with your choice of CD: Ani DiFranco or Broadways Greatest Hits. North Buffalo Barbie/Ken: This Italian model Barbie comes only in Brunette and drives a Sunfire and has a dog or child named Bella. Ken comes with his own hair gel and gold chain with a huge cross on the end. West Seneca/Orchard Park Barbie: This Barbie comes complete with clip on hair extensions and false eyelashes. Her platform shoes come in chunky and extra chunky. Tanning bed sold separately. not bad... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SWVABillsFan Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 Ray, dude, seriously. Where did you come up with this chit? How about a thru-way Barbie, or Western NY Barbie? Do up a few more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RayFinkle Posted June 19, 2009 Author Share Posted June 19, 2009 Ray, dude, seriously. Where did you come up with this chit? How about a thru-way Barbie, or Western NY Barbie? Do up a few more. I can not and do not take credit for this. I got it in a chain email and then found it online as well... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 Lackawanna Barbie: This chain-smoking, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of another Barbies house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see through halter-top. Cheektowaga version comes with a mobile home and pink flamingo. That is too funny... I married a Lackawanna Barbie (actual name sans the "ie")... Also funny I am from Cheektowaga... My name is not Ken though... Anyway, my wife has a Master's in Library and Information Science from the U of I (Illinois)... I should ask her if she has a alter ego hiding under that administrative Librarian facade! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marv's Neighbor Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 Geez I'm from S. Buffalo/West Senica and went to High School in L.A. (Lackawanna) so I don't know where to start! How about Allentown Barbie. Actually now she lives in Amherst because there are just too many Kens in Alentown. Ballet Barbie- you have to have a Passport to meet her. Ken goes by Gordie at the Ballet. Flat Barbie. No she's not really F-l-a-t but she lives in one in S Buffalo. Lake Effect Barbie- Some say she's fridgid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cåblelady Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bullpen Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 I received a Chautauqua County version of this a couple years ago. It just doesn't have the same effect at the Buffalo version. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 I received a Chautauqua County version of this a couple years ago. It just doesn't have the same effect at the Buffalo version. Is there really a difference between the Westfield, Mayville, and Jamestown Barbie... And don't get me started on the Lily Dale Barbie, they are just plain freaky! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GOBILLS78 Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 Is there really a difference between the Westfield, Mayville, and Jamestown Barbie... And don't get me started on the Lily Dale Barbie, they are just plain freaky! Of course. The Fredonia doll stinks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted June 19, 2009 Share Posted June 19, 2009 Of course. The Fredonia doll stinks. They also say that the Frewsburg Barbies like to get jiggy wit it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bullpen Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 They also say that the Frewsburg Barbies like to get jiggy wit it! That would be the Falconer Barbie. I got this from a friend a while ago, I sent it to Beerball a while back. It's actually pretty funny. IF CHAUTAUQUA COUNTY SCHOOLS WERE ACTUAL PEOPLE: (don't know how Randolph figures to be Chautauqua Co though) Brocton is the kid with his head down who might shoot up the school someday. Cassadaga is the kind of dirty kid that always has parties in his corn field to fit in. Chautauqua Lake is the class president that EVERYONE hates. Clymer is the kid in 4H who has to leave class everyday at noon to do chores. Dunkirk is the kid everyone THINKS is a gangsta... Falconer is the kid in wood shop, who's always getting in trouble at school Forestville is the kid who smokes pot in the parking lot before school everyday, and leaves during lunch to smoke a cigarette across the street. Fredonia is the slut who always goes to the bar with the guys who graduated four years ago. Frewsburg is the virgin church going girl who screwed three guys on prom night. Jamestown is the star point guard who got kicked off the team for selling drugs. Maple Grove is the cocky kid who comes out of the closet in college Panama is the closet whore that gave an STD to Cassadaga Pine Valley is the kid who skips school for the opening day of deer season. Randolph buys us all beer because he was the kid who grew a full beard at age 12 Ripley is the kid that no one knows his name or where the hell he came from. Sherman is Clymers cousin even though they hook up. Silver Creek is the big indian kid who sells cartons of cigarettes out of his locker. Southwestern is the Quarterback of the football team that no one really likes, but we still go to his parties at his lake house. Westfield is the kid who got a DWI but still drives to school Bethel Baptist is the kid who wears a shirt and tie to picture day and has the backpack on wheels that he runs with between classes Boces is the kid that can't take normal classes but isn't allowed in special ed. JCC is the person that's always going back to see teachers and hang out at highschool after they graduate and think theyre so fuggin cool for it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 That would be the Falconer Barbie. I got this from a friend a while ago, I sent it to Beerball a while back. It's actually pretty funny. IF CHAUTAUQUA COUNTY SCHOOLS WERE ACTUAL PEOPLE: (don't know how Randolph figures to be Chautauqua Co though) Brocton is the kid with his head down who might shoot up the school someday. Cassadaga is the kind of dirty kid that always has parties in his corn field to fit in. Chautauqua Lake is the class president that EVERYONE hates. Clymer is the kid in 4H who has to leave class everyday at noon to do chores. Dunkirk is the kid everyone THINKS is a gangsta... Falconer is the kid in wood shop, who's always getting in trouble at school Forestville is the kid who smokes pot in the parking lot before school everyday, and leaves during lunch to smoke a cigarette across the street. Fredonia is the slut who always goes to the bar with the guys who graduated four years ago. Frewsburg is the virgin church going girl who screwed three guys on prom night. Jamestown is the star point guard who got kicked off the team for selling drugs. Maple Grove is the cocky kid who comes out of the closet in college Panama is the closet whore that gave an STD to Cassadaga Pine Valley is the kid who skips school for the opening day of deer season. Randolph buys us all beer because he was the kid who grew a full beard at age 12 Ripley is the kid that no one knows his name or where the hell he came from. Sherman is Clymers cousin even though they hook up. Silver Creek is the big indian kid who sells cartons of cigarettes out of his locker. Southwestern is the Quarterback of the football team that no one really likes, but we still go to his parties at his lake house. Westfield is the kid who got a DWI but still drives to school Bethel Baptist is the kid who wears a shirt and tie to picture day and has the backpack on wheels that he runs with between classes Boces is the kid that can't take normal classes but isn't allowed in special ed. JCC is the person that's always going back to see teachers and hang out at highschool after they graduate and think theyre so fuggin cool for it Too funny! I said Frewsburg because wasn't Shane Conlan from Frewsburg? I went with the Bills tie-in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bullpen Posted June 23, 2009 Share Posted June 23, 2009 Too funny! I said Frewsburg because wasn't Shane Conlan from Frewsburg? I went with the Bills tie-in. Yeah he is from "the burg" my dad coached him in Babe Ruth All Stars. (total LAMP information there) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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