/dev/null Posted May 31, 2009 Author Posted May 31, 2009 This is another one of those threads that has taken a strange turn. Oh it just keeps getting better... yep. The justnzane Theme Song
NavyBillsFan Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 Monica Lewinsky walks into a drycleaner and asks to have a stain removed from her dress. The Clerk being hard of hearing says "come again?" And Monica replies.... " No, mustard"
The Senator Posted June 3, 2009 Posted June 3, 2009 So this penguin is vacationing out in Arizona, and his car breaks down - he gets a tow to the local garage, and the mechanic tells him, "No problem, I'll have you on your way in about an hour." So, the penguin goes to the local DQ to get himself an ice cream cone. Now, this being a hot Arizona day, by the time Mr. Penguin gets back to the garage, the ice cream has dripped all over his bill and over his face. So anyway, as he approaches the garage, the mechanic calls out, "Looks like you blew a seal," to which Mr. Penguin replies, "What????!!!! No!!!! It's just ice cream!!!!"
el Tigre Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 So this penguin is vacationing out in Arizona, and his car breaks down - he gets a tow to the local garage, and the mechanic tells him, "No problem, I'll have you on your way in about an hour." So, the penguin goes to the local DQ to get himself an ice cream cone. Now, this being a hot Arizona day, by the time Mr. Penguin gets back to the garage, the ice cream has dripped all over his bill and over his face. So anyway, as he approaches the garage, the mechanic calls out, "Looks like you blew a seal," to which Mr. Penguin replies, "What????!!!! No!!!! It's just ice cream!!!!"
dib Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 skeleton walks into a bar and says: "Give me a beer and a mop" Horse walks into a bar- bartender says: "Why the long face?"
WWVaBeach Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 So this penguin is vacationing out in Arizona, and his car breaks down - he gets a tow to the local garage, and the mechanic tells him, "No problem, I'll have you on your way in about an hour." So, the penguin goes to the local DQ to get himself an ice cream cone. Now, this being a hot Arizona day, by the time Mr. Penguin gets back to the garage, the ice cream has dripped all over his bill and over his face. So anyway, as he approaches the garage, the mechanic calls out, "Looks like you blew a seal," to which Mr. Penguin replies, "What????!!!! No!!!! It's just ice cream!!!!" I have an MPEG of this with a bunch of chimps in a bar telling the joke...frigging hilarious! Wish I knew how to post it here.
eSJayDee Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 I have an MPEG of this with a bunch of chimps in a bar telling the joke...frigging hilarious! I think I've got the same video. And YES, it is MUCH funnier when told by chimps! I don't know how to upload it, but if one were ambitious, one could find a link to it.
C.Biscuit97 Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud? Why didn't the turkey eat at Thanksgiving? Because he was stuffed.
TheBlackMamba Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 a horse walks into a bar...the bartender says "why the long face"...
TheBlackMamba Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 Why do seagulls fly over the sea? ... because if they flew over the bay, they'd be "Bay Gulls"... bagels... get it? Ahhh... nevermind!
The Senator Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 So this duck walks into a bar, orders a drink, and tells the bartender, "Put it on my bill."
justnzane Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 Oh it just keeps getting better... The justnzane Theme Song I'm a lyrical wordsmith Speaking of bad jokes: "Why does a squirrel swim on it backside?" "To keep its nuts dry"
The Senator Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 So this ham & cheese sandwich walks into a bar, sits down and orders, and the bartender says, "Sorry...we don't serve food here."
GoodBye Posted June 7, 2009 Posted June 7, 2009 What did the sailor find in the toilet? The Captain's log.
BLZFAN4LIFE Posted June 7, 2009 Posted June 7, 2009 "Doc, I can't stop singing the green green grass of home." "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome. " "Is it common? " "It's not unusual."
BLZFAN4LIFE Posted June 7, 2009 Posted June 7, 2009 Have you heard about the dyslexic lawyer? He spent all year studying for the bra exam. What do you call a cow with no legs? -Ground Beef. What do you call a sleepwalking nun? Roamin' Catholic. What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, an agnostic and an insomniac?? A guy who stays up all night wondering if there really IS a dog. A mushroom walks into a bar. Bartender says, "we don't serve your kind here." Mushroom says, "why not, I'm a FUN GUY!!!"
IDBillzFan Posted June 7, 2009 Posted June 7, 2009 What did the egg say to the boiling water? "I just got laid and you want me to get hard in three minutes?"
eSJayDee Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 I think I've got the same video. And YES, it is MUCH funnier when told by chimps!I don't know how to upload it, but if one were ambitious, one could find a link to it. Found it :
Steely Dan Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 I have an MPEG of this with a bunch of chimps in a bar telling the joke...frigging hilarious! Wish I knew how to post it here. What do Captain Kirk and toilet paper have in common? They both keep Klingons off Uranus.
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