DIE HARD 1967 Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 Go ahead, you can be Ralph Wilson. Give me your best sales pitch for purchasing season tickets , should Dick Jauron remain HEAD COACH. That remains the #1 reason why he needs to go, it is simply impossible to market Dick Jauron to the Buffalo fans. I don't care who Buffalo gets in free agency or the draft, if you can't coach them, they are worthless. Now, go ahead and try to sell me.....this should be good! See post #17 for my sales pitch
Tortured Soul Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 If you don't buy tickets to the 2009 Bills, be prepared to buy tickets to the 2010 LA Starlets.
BEAST MODE BABY! Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 You get to enjoy Dick ball for another year. And saying "Dick ball" will be offensive to some. So hopefully, that will mean our offense will improve next year.
BuffaloBill Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 Go ahead, you can be Ralph Wilson. Give me your best sales pitch for purchasing season tickets for next year should Dick Jauron remain HEAD COACH. That remains the #1 reason why he needs to go! I don't care who Buffalo gets in free agency or the draft, if you can't coach them, they are worthless. Being a Bills fan is the new S&M (sex sells). Where else can you go (besides this board) for pain, suffering and a total lack of satisfaction. Enjoy life as other team's fans laugh at you. Feel humilated every time the Bills get on national t.v. Viagara will be the new Bills team sponsor.
San-O Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 If you don't buy tickets to the 2009 Bills, be prepared to buy tickets to the 2010 LA Starlets. This team would never survive in LA. See L.A. Rams and L.A. Raiders. People won't pay a lousy product, as this area has the biggest band-wagon fans in the country.
BillsWatch Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 "You will be sitting with a better class of people because many idiots are not renewing their tickets".
DIE HARD 1967 Posted December 10, 2008 Author Posted December 10, 2008 "You will be sitting with a better class of people because many idiots are not renewing their tickets". You are correct. By the way Gas is 1.64 on my corner in Florida
ans4e64 Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 "You've all heard of people using extenze, the new product for male enhancement. Well, I've decided to extend my Dick as well. He'll be back for another season. With my new extension, we'll be able to play harder, faster, and able to sustain ourselves for a full 60 minutes. No more starting out fast and going 5 and 1, only to loose our momentum and shrink our playoff chances. My Dick's extension will add length at the end of the season, and into the playoffs. Buy our season tickets and get a live show for our new and extended Buffalo Bills!"
San-O Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 The 2009 Buffalo Bills Come spend some money, freeze your ass off, and let us assault your senses! "A tradition of fielding a team for over 40 years."
Wiz Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 Russ and Ralph can dress him in a Count Dracula outfit on the sidelines. "I will suck the life out of this team!!! ho ho ha ha"
BEAST MODE BABY! Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 "You've all heard of people using extenze, the new product for male enhancement. Well, I've excited to extend my Dick as well. He'll be back for another season. With my new extension, we'll be able to play harder, faster, and able to sustain ourselves for a full 60 minutes. No more starting out fast and going 5 and 1, only to loose our momentum and shrink our playoff chances. My Dick's extension will add length at the end of the season, and into the playoffs. Buy our season tickets and get a live show for our new and extended Buffalo Bills!" It's the one Dick extension that still results in 53 flacid men.
Tortured Soul Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 The 2009 Buffalo Bills Come spend some money, freeze your ass off, and let us assault your senses! "A tradition of fielding a team for over 40 years." I think that's the right line of thinking. "Come on. You've been buying tickets to 43 championship-less seasons, why stop now?"
San-O Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 Russ and Ralph acan dress him in a Count Dracula outfit on the sidelines. "I will suck the life out of this team!!! ho ho ha ha" That's pretty good.
Buftex Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 My imitation of DJ on the sidelines, on any given Sunday:
keepthefaith Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 Go ahead, you can be Ralph Wilson. Give me your best sales pitch for purchasing season tickets , should Dick Jauron remain HEAD COACH. That remains the #1 reason why he needs to go, it is simply impossible to market Dick Jauron to the Buffalo fans. I don't care who Buffalo gets in free agency or the draft, if you can't coach them, they are worthless. Now, go ahead and try to sell me.....this should be good! Thinking really hard with my best marketing hat on, I could not come up with anything.
DIE HARD 1967 Posted December 10, 2008 Author Posted December 10, 2008 You guys disappoint me, here is my sales pitch form Ralph. Dick Jauron was selected by a wonderful, intelligent, well schooled, ex GM and Coach..... Marv Levy. He is a very studious young man, with nerves of steel and never shows any emotion. THE PLAYERS JUST LOVE HIM and begged me not to fire him. Our players take full responsibility for the 2008 season and Dick Jauron is blameless in my book. We are on course to win the Superbowl in 2009. We are truly fortunate to have such a brilliant young coach in Dick Jauron, and that is why I extended his contract by 3 years? So just shut up and buy those tickets...or I will move the Bills to Toronto! -Ralph
KD in CA Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 He'll use some Turd Polish of course (one of my favorite BANG! cartoons with our own Dick J in a cameo role).
DC Tom Posted December 10, 2008 Posted December 10, 2008 He'll use some Turd Polish of course (one of my favorite BANG! cartoons with our own Dick J in a cameo role). You know, Mythbusters just did an episode a few weeks back where they actually DID polish a turd. It can be done, but only under very specific circumstances. E.g., the 2001 Chicago Bears.
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