aussiew Posted November 12, 2008 Share Posted November 12, 2008 Didn't have time to go to snopes to verify these. But I found them entertaining so thought I would share. Sent from my brother in Australia. With apologies to our French Bills fans. Enjoy..... A few noteable Military riposts ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When in England at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was asked by the Archbishop of Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were just an example of empire building' by George Bush. He answered by saying, 'Over the years, the United States has sent many of its fine young men and women into great peril to fight for freedom beyond our borders. The only amount of land we have ever asked for in return is enough to bury those that did not return. You could have heard a pin drop. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Then there was a conference in France where a number of international engineers were taking part, including French and American. During a break one of the French engineers came back into the room saying 'Have you heard the latest dumb stunt Bush has done? He has sent an aircraft carrier to Indonesia to help the tsunami victims. What does he intended to do, bomb them?' A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly: 'Our carriers have three hospitals on board that can treat several hundred people; they are nuclear powered and can supply emergency electrical power to shore facilities; they have three cafeterias with the capacity to feed 3,000 people three meals a day, they can produce several thousand gallons of fresh water from sea water each day, and they carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting victims and injured to and from their flight deck.. We have eleven such ships; how many does France have?' You could have heard a pin drop. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a naval conference that included Admirals from the U.S. , English, Canadian, Australian and French Navies. At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a large group of Officers that included personnel from most of those countries. Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped their drinks but a French admiral suddenly complained that, 'whereas Europeans learn many languages, Americans learn only English.' He then asked, 'Why is it that we always have to speak English in these conferences rather than speaking French?' Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied 'Maybe it's because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to speak German.' You could have heard a pin drop. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ AND THIS STORY FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE... A group of Americans, retired teachers, recently went to France on a tour. Robert Whiting, an elderly gentleman of 83, arrived in Paris by plane. At French Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry on. ' You have been to France before, monsieur?' the customs officer asked sarcastically. Mr. Whiting admitted that he had been to France previously. 'Then you should know enough to have your passport ready.' The American said, 'The last time I was here, I didn't have to show it.' 'Impossible. Americans always have to show your passports on arrival in France !' The American senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look. Then he quietly explained. 'Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-Day in '44 to help liberate this country, I couldn't find any damn Frenchmen to show it to.' You could have heard a pin drop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dib Posted November 12, 2008 Share Posted November 12, 2008 When Charles DeGaulle met with General Gavin to demand the removal of all Americans from French Soil- Gavin replied: "Does this include our dead?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stuckincincy Posted November 12, 2008 Share Posted November 12, 2008 The British Military writes OFR's (officer fitness reports). The form used for Royal Navy and Marines fitness reports is the S206. The following are actual excerpts taken from people's "206's".... His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity. I would not breed from this Officer. This Officer is really not so much of a hasbeen, but more of a definitely won'tbe. When she opens her mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there. He has carried out each and every one of his duties to his entire satisfaction. He would be out of his depth in a car park puddle. Technically sound, but socially impossible. This Officer reminds me very much of a gyroscope always spinning around at a frantic pace, but not really going anywhere. This young lady has delusions of adequacy. When he joined my ship, this Officer was something of a granny; since then he has aged considerably. Since my last report he has reached rock bottom, and has started to dig. She sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them. He has the wisdom of youth, and the energy of old age. This Officer should go far and the sooner he starts, the better. In my opinion this pilot should not be authorized to fly below 250 feet. The only ship I would recommend this man for is citizenship. Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap. This man is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. ...no idea where the symbols came from..just copied 'n pasted... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bartshan-83 Posted November 12, 2008 Share Posted November 12, 2008 Good stuff! I give this thread a Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillsWatch Posted November 12, 2008 Share Posted November 12, 2008 You could have heard a pin drop. Just stories. I know this as a fact for French would never shut enough to hear pin drop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PromoTheRobot Posted November 14, 2008 Share Posted November 14, 2008 And now you have....the REST of the story. PTR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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