The Poojer Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 .........I mean meet women/girls/females...... This "Friend" of mine is recently single after 17 years of marriage....this "Friend" is horrible at meeting women/girls/females...."He" has this horrible fear to go up and initiate conversations. That said...this "Friend" is very interested in this woman/girl/female that works in "his" doctors office. "He has found out that she is in fact single as well. How is this "Friend" supposed to get the ball rolling? the only time "he" sees her is when "he" goes to the doctors, and asking someone out in private is one thing, but doing it in front of other people....???? may as well just pull the trigger on "him". Also keep in mind, that the doctors office is the entire family's doctor, and while this "Friend" has updated "his" profile to read 'divorced' who knows if anyone has paid attention. So this woman/girl/female could very well think "he" is still married. So this "Friend" has made a couple of phone calls the doctors office to ask some billing questions to which "he" already knew the answer, simply to speak with her and get her name. Mind you, this "Friend" has had a couple of casual converstaions with her about concerts etc...and she knows that this "Friend" has connections to tickets, so "he" has some groundwork with which to build on. But still it would be completely out of the blue to ask her out. Also keep in mind that if "he" was to ask her out and she were to say 'No', this "Friend" would feel the need to find a new doctor, and "he" doesnt want to do that..... So this "Friend" has located her on myspace. What are your thoughts about this "Friend" 'contacting' her through that site, again, simply to put this "Friend" at least in the back of her mind....I...I mean this "Friend" really would like your thoughts. And YES, this "Friend" realizes "he" is nothing but a chicken chit and "he" needs to sack up and ask her out...but if it was that easy...."he" wouldnt be spending all this unecessary time seeking out advice.... Thanks and feel free to flame away, I will relay all the messages to this "Friend" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fezmid Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 Your friend could hide around the corner of the doctor's office and when the girl starts walking towards her car at the end of the day, your friend could follow her and ask her out there. Or get pepper sprayed, one of the two... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrDawkinstein Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 rule #1 for a modern healthy relationship: stay as far away from myspace as possible Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Poojer Posted July 26, 2008 Author Share Posted July 26, 2008 hahahahha....that is an option..... Your friend could hide around the corner of the doctor's office and when the girl starts walking towards her car at the end of the day, your friend could follow her and ask her out there. Or get pepper sprayed, one of the two... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Poojer Posted July 26, 2008 Author Share Posted July 26, 2008 the whole myspace angle was simply intended as a subtle icebreaker....kind of as if to say...."Hey. I know you....came across your site"....then go for the more face to face from there....this "Friend" simply is paralyzed by the more direct in person route....this would make the first contact less "out of the blue" and that is a hell of a lot easier for this "Friend" to deal with rule #1 for a modern healthy relationship: stay as far away from myspace as possible Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Poojer Posted July 26, 2008 Author Share Posted July 26, 2008 OH and one more thing as I know some bastard will ask.....no this "Friend" will not post pictures to help y'all in formulating your opinions/advice/criticisms etc.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fezmid Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 OH and one more thing as I know some bastard will ask.....no this "Friend" will not post pictures to help y'all in formulating your opinions/advice/criticisms etc.. How about just her MySpace page link? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevestojan Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 Here's my honest advice. Grow a set. Most girls aren't going to say straight out "no", but even if she doesn't accept immediately, and uses some lame excuse, so what??? You're a bit embarrassed and life goes on. Women seem to like a man who isn't afraid of talking to them. I only give you this blunt advise because you're a good guy. And I know you can take it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Poojer Posted July 26, 2008 Author Share Posted July 26, 2008 I have told this "Friend" this forever.....oh wait....you don't think i am talking about myself do you??? HAH! They don't call me the "Chuck Norris of dating" for nothing, and no that isnt a 3rd fist under my beard, and no I am not happy to see you Here's my honest advice. Grow a set. Most girls aren't going to say straight out "no", but even if she doesn't accept immediately, and uses some lame excuse, so what??? You're a bit embarrassed and life goes on. Women seem to like a man who isn't afraid of talking to them. I only give you this blunt advise because you're a good guy. And I know you can take it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
udonkey Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 creepy bastard Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Jack Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 Mind you, this "Friend" has had a couple of casual converstaions with her about concerts etc...and she knows that this "Friend" has connections to tickets, so "he" has some groundwork with which to build on. But still it would be completely out of the blue to ask her out. Also keep in mind that if "he" was to ask her out and she were to say 'No', this "Friend" would feel the need to find a new doctor, and "he" doesnt want to do that..... Next time this "friend" gets tickets, make a doctors appointment, then at some point mention, "Hey I got to tickets to (whatever), everyone I would normally ask is busy, are you interested in going to see them with me?" If they say no, drop the subject. If they say sorry, but try again some other time, then try again the next time you this "friend" has tickets. If they say yes, ask if the doctor has any free condoms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KD in CA Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 Here's my honest advice. Grow a set. Yup. Women like confidence more than anything. Pick up the friggin phone, dial her number and ask her out. If she says no, so what? Move on to match.com and find one of the millions of other fish in the sea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rico Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 .........I mean meet women/girls/females...... This "Friend" of mine is recently single after 17 years of marriage....this "Friend" is horrible at meeting women/girls/females...."He" has this horrible fear to go up and initiate conversations. That said...this "Friend" is very interested in this woman/girl/female that works in "his" doctors office. "He has found out that she is in fact single as well. How is this "Friend" supposed to get the ball rolling? the only time "he" sees her is when "he" goes to the doctors, and asking someone out in private is one thing, but doing it in front of other people....???? may as well just pull the trigger on "him". Also keep in mind, that the doctors office is the entire family's doctor, and while this "Friend" has updated "his" profile to read 'divorced' who knows if anyone has paid attention. So this woman/girl/female could very well think "he" is still married. So this "Friend" has made a couple of phone calls the doctors office to ask some billing questions to which "he" already knew the answer, simply to speak with her and get her name. Mind you, this "Friend" has had a couple of casual converstaions with her about concerts etc...and she knows that this "Friend" has connections to tickets, so "he" has some groundwork with which to build on. But still it would be completely out of the blue to ask her out. Also keep in mind that if "he" was to ask her out and she were to say 'No', this "Friend" would feel the need to find a new doctor, and "he" doesnt want to do that..... So this "Friend" has located her on myspace. What are your thoughts about this "Friend" 'contacting' her through that site, again, simply to put this "Friend" at least in the back of her mind....I...I mean this "Friend" really would like your thoughts. And YES, this "Friend" realizes "he" is nothing but a chicken chit and "he" needs to sack up and ask her out...but if it was that easy...."he" wouldnt be spending all this unecessary time seeking out advice.... Thanks and feel free to flame away, I will relay all the messages to this "Friend" http://tinyurl.com/643ly7 If that fails, http://tinyurl.com/5ppq4l Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
/dev/null Posted July 26, 2008 Share Posted July 26, 2008 Make sure you're not really talking to Chris Hanson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RayFinkle Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 the whole myspace angle was simply intended as a subtle icebreaker....kind of as if to say...."Hey. I know you....came across your site"....then go for the more face to face from there....this "Friend" simply is paralyzed by the more direct in person route....this would make the first contact less "out of the blue" and that is a hell of a lot easier for this "Friend" to deal with I would definitely NOT take this angle. There is nothing wrong with being a bit shy, but sometimes you just have to bite the bullet. My advise, next time you speak with her, hopefully face to face, keep it casual. Find a local bar which is having a band which doesn't suck. Tell her about the band, let her know that you and your buddy or buddies are going to see them and suggest to her that she show up as well. Short Example: "Me and my friend are going up to INSERT BAR NAME on Saturday night to see XYZ BAND. I've seen them before and they put on a good show. If you aren't doing anything, you should stop by and check them out, it will be fun." If she shows up, then you know there is interest. If she doesn't, then you move on. Simple. I used to work at a bar and I used this ALLLL the time. If I met a girl I liked, I would tell her where I worked and invite them to stop by. If she walked into the bar, I was in like Flynn. If she never showed up, no harm, no foul. Keep it simple. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcjeff215 Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 .........I mean meet women/girls/females...... This "Friend" of mine is recently single after 17 years of marriage....this "Friend" is horrible at meeting women/girls/females...."He" has this horrible fear to go up and initiate conversations. That said...this "Friend" is very interested in this woman/girl/female that works in "his" doctors office. "He has found out that she is in fact single as well. How is this "Friend" supposed to get the ball rolling? the only time "he" sees her is when "he" goes to the doctors, and asking someone out in private is one thing, but doing it in front of other people....???? may as well just pull the trigger on "him". Also keep in mind, that the doctors office is the entire family's doctor, and while this "Friend" has updated "his" profile to read 'divorced' who knows if anyone has paid attention. So this woman/girl/female could very well think "he" is still married. So this "Friend" has made a couple of phone calls the doctors office to ask some billing questions to which "he" already knew the answer, simply to speak with her and get her name. Mind you, this "Friend" has had a couple of casual converstaions with her about concerts etc...and she knows that this "Friend" has connections to tickets, so "he" has some groundwork with which to build on. But still it would be completely out of the blue to ask her out. Also keep in mind that if "he" was to ask her out and she were to say 'No', this "Friend" would feel the need to find a new doctor, and "he" doesnt want to do that..... So this "Friend" has located her on myspace. What are your thoughts about this "Friend" 'contacting' her through that site, again, simply to put this "Friend" at least in the back of her mind....I...I mean this "Friend" really would like your thoughts. And YES, this "Friend" realizes "he" is nothing but a chicken chit and "he" needs to sack up and ask her out...but if it was that easy...."he" wouldnt be spending all this unecessary time seeking out advice.... Thanks and feel free to flame away, I will relay all the messages to this "Friend" I feel like a tool saying this, but you're probably more likely to be turned down if she's an employee there. Unless you've got some unique relationship with her, she'll probably make every effort to keep everything professional. Your doctor may even have a problem with it. So, ask yourself this... quite honestly, is there any type of connection from her side, or do you just have a hard on for the hot insurance girl? It doesn't matter which angle you take in my opinion, you're trying to step over that personal/professional line. Whether you ask her in person or send her a message via MySpace/Facebook, you're still taking that step. She'll make that 'this guy is a patient at work' association. If you think you've a relationship with her in which that will be welcomed, then it probably will be. If she knows you as the hypochondriac guy in the Pi - Pz cabinet, well, then it's probably not going to work either way. Also, how old is she? Range? She'll probably respond differently to the MySpace angle if she's 20 - 35 rather than 35 - 50. The angle McRicoSuave here would take? The next time you have to go to the doctor's office, get there an hour early by accident. Realize your 'mistake' and mention that you'll just go get a cup of coffee and wait it out. Ask if she wants you to bring back anything for her. Oh and of course, replace every instance of 'you' in the above post with 'your friend.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Poojer Posted July 27, 2008 Author Share Posted July 27, 2008 I think this "Friend" has decided that if "he" gets tickets to the Foreigner show this wednesday nite, "he" will call her and ask her to go. If "he" doesn't get these tickets, "he" has Darkstar Orchestra and Boston tickets in the next couple of weeks as well....plus Flo-bots.....I will let you know how "he" makes out Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Live&DieBillsFootball Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 I think this "Friend" has decided that if "he" gets tickets to the Foreigner show this wednesday nite, "he" will call her and ask her to go. If "he" doesn't get these tickets, "he" has Darkstar Orchestra and Boston tickets in the next couple of weeks as well....plus Flo-bots.....I will let you know how "he" makes out You just needed people to talk a little smack to you to get fired up to do it. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Poojer Posted July 27, 2008 Author Share Posted July 27, 2008 what i need is a really good wing man...my options right now are a guy who is my dearest friend in the world, but he has never really had a date in his life...and yes he is straight...the other option is a cadre of really hot girls...emphasis on really hot....who are really good friends....but i fear that girls would be intimidated by them....they really are hot....even to some of the bastards on this boards standards.... You just needed people to talk a little smack to you to get fired up to do it. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fan in San Diego Posted July 27, 2008 Share Posted July 27, 2008 what i need is a really good wing man...my options right now are a guy who is my dearest friend in the world, but he has never really had a date in his life...and yes he is straight...the other option is a cadre of really hot girls...emphasis on really hot....who are really good friends....but i fear that girls would be intimidated by them....they really are hot....even to some of the bastards on this boards standards.... Why aren't you asking out the really hot girlfriends ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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