Steely Dan Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 I'm going out of town in order to finalize contracts!! I'm serious I'm leaving Friday Morning and will be back Friday afternoon! That gives you one week to think about this! Because horse slaughter is no longer practiced in this country, these thoroughbreds are now being shipped by "killer buyers" to slaughterhouses abroad, which are frequently less regulated and less humane than former U.S. slaughterhouses... ...many of these young and healthy horses take from the track, to auctions, to slaughterhouses, and finally to the plates of European and Japanese diners who pay top dollar for the delicacy. Pinkie meat is especially prized!! I'm a business man and I'll sell Pinkie to the highest bidder. I'll then give you one more week to raise the cash and I want a pair of season tickets too! The season tickets should be on the fifty yard line but don't look at whether they are on one side or the other. If you know where the seats are the deals off!!! I want the money broken down this way; 1 $20 bill. 49,979 $1 bills 3 quaters 2 dimes 5 pennies Will this convince you? The last guy who never paid found this in his bed!! Let's just say the boys think she's attractive You don't want to see this shoved up her!! The only reason I'm doing this is because my mom really needs hair implants and a back wax! You have until June 7th to come up with the dough!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beerball Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 Well, if he gets an all expense paid trip to France who am I to argue? Bon voyage Pinkie, never ever stop prancing. (please don't let Sketch see this, he loves that pony like a...he loves that pony like a...DAMN, he really loves him some pink pony...but all I could contribute would be 3.5 cents) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted May 22, 2008 Author Share Posted May 22, 2008 Well, if he gets an all expense paid trip to France who am I to argue? Bon voyage Pinkie, never ever stop prancing. (please don't let Sketch see this, he loves that pony like a...he loves that pony like a...DAMN, he really loves him some pink pony...but all I could contribute would be 3.5 cents) Look I'm not firm on the $50k we can negotiate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted May 22, 2008 Author Share Posted May 22, 2008 On the serious side of it, there are a few good charity groups that really help out and try to save as many horses as possible. I donate as much as I can to these groups. As our horses retire, we try our best to make sure they end up in good homes. The biggest problem happens when you sell a horse or have one claimed from you and lose track where he is. It is common for horses to get a break for months at a time, so by the time you figure out a horse is retired, he may have been sold off already. We've only had one case of a shady donation where I gave an older mare away to a place looking for a pasture buddy for another horse, and a year later I get a report someone different had bred her. Horses have different personalities and the smart ones can usually find a job in retirement. If gas goes up much more (now priced at $5 a galon for July 4th weekend), these horses are going to be wanted for work and transportation. Here are a few places I deal with that put donations to work. Thoroughbred Charities .....All aspects of helping the industry Rerun Horse Rescue .....All About Saving Horses....Good Network and Ebay Auctions of collector's items at times Thanks Buzz Killington. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted May 22, 2008 Author Share Posted May 22, 2008 Feel free to do the same when I title the thread, "Look at the Jugs on this one!". post a link to a story on Roswell's breast cancer treatment, then proceed to bid imaginary dollars on Mandy Moore's chest because someone has a picture of her on their profile. Dude, I'm not saying that it's a bad charity just that this thread is meant for levity. K Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead107 Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 Glue factory . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In space no one can hear Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 Can this thread be merged with the smiley faced killers thread? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sketch Soland Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 I will say this once, and once only: Don't make me use my Nord Powers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
erynthered Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 I will say this once, and once only: Don't make me use my Nord Powers. Is that Austin Powers brother? Or Tyrone's brother? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beerball Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 Is that Austin Powers brother? Or Tyrone's brother? I believe he is the younger brother of Shifty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sketch Soland Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 I will say this twice, and only twice: Don't make me use my Nord Powers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beerball Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 Look I'm not firm on the $50k we can negotiate. OK, I talked to some friends of some friends and they indicate to me that you will soon be bringing Pinkie back to Sketch looking even prancier than normal. These friends of friends also indicate that you will be providing Sketch with US currency in the amount of a dollartreeeighty as compensation for his trouble. These friends of friends also indicate that you will be taking Sketch & Pinkie for a night of fine dining at La Nova where you will settle the tab and leave a very generous tip for the wait staff. It's really nice when we can resolve our differences in such a civilized manner isn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
erynthered Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 OK, I talked to some friends of some friends and they indicate to me that you will soon be bringing Pinkie back to Sketch looking even prancier than normal. These friends of friends also indicate that you will be providing Sketch with US currency in the amount of a dollartreeeighty as compensation for his trouble. These friends of friends also indicate that you will be taking Sketch & Pinkie for a night of fine dining at La Nova where you will settle the tab and leave a very generous tip for the wait staff. It's really nice when we can resolve our differences in such a civilized manner isn't it? Dats an offer he shuldnt refuse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sketch Soland Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 OK, I talked to some friends of some friends and they indicate to me that you will soon be bringing Pinkie back to Sketch looking even prancier than normal. These friends of friends also indicate that you will be providing Sketch with US currency in the amount of a dollartreeeighty as compensation for his trouble. These friends of friends also indicate that you will be taking Sketch & Pinkie for a night of fine dining at La Nova where you will settle the tab and leave a very generous tip for the wait staff. It's really nice when we can resolve our differences in such a civilized manner isn't it? YOU DA MAN BALL OF BEER! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beerball Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 YOU DA MAN BALL OF BEER! I am proud to serve the Man O Nord! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bullpen Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 Sketch, they got one of those old fashioned toilets in the bathroom, you know the one with the chain hangin down. I could have one of my men a gun up behind the tank where no one will think to look. You excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and get the gun. You come back out you shoot him once. Then you just let your hand drop to your side and the gun slip out. Everyone will still think you've got it. They're gonna be staring at your face, Sketch. So walk out of the place real fast, but you don't run. Don't look nobody directly in the eye, don't don't look away either. They're gonna be scared of you, believe me, so don't worry about nothing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sketch Soland Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 Sketch, they got one of those old fashioned toilets in the bathroom, you know the one with the chain hangin down. I could have one of my men a gun up behind the tank where no one will think to look. You excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and get the gun. You come back out you shoot him once. Then you just let your hand drop to your side and the gun slip out. Everyone will still think you've got it. They're gonna be staring at your face, Sketch. So walk out of the place real fast, but you don't run. Don't look nobody directly in the eye, don't don't look away either. They're gonna be scared of you, believe me, so don't worry about nothing. I don't know. Did you ask Clemenza about this plan? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted May 22, 2008 Author Share Posted May 22, 2008 Can this thread be merged with the smiley faced killers thread? OK, I talked to some friends of some friends and they indicate to me that you will soon be bringing Pinkie back to Sketch looking even prancier than normal. These friends of friends also indicate that you will be providing Sketch with US currency in the amount of a dollartreeeighty as compensation for his trouble. These friends of friends also indicate that you will be taking Sketch & Pinkie for a night of fine dining at La Nova where you will settle the tab and leave a very generous tip for the wait staff. It's really nice when we can resolve our differences in such a civilized manner isn't it? The only way Sketch is going to see this horse, unless he pays, is on a plate with carrots (She loves carrots) and a baked potato! YOU DA MAN BALL OF BEER! I have not agreed to any such deal! My mom needs those hair implants and a back wax!! I just found out last night that she also needs liposuction for her cottage cheese thighs. I love my mommy and want to help her she every night because the only men interested in her are weirdo's with strange hairless head, hairy back with cottage cheese thighs fetishists!! It hurts me to see her like this!!! PAY UP YOU BASTARD!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steely Dan Posted May 22, 2008 Author Share Posted May 22, 2008 Sketch, they got one of those old fashioned toilets in the bathroom, you know the one with the chain hangin down. I could have one of my men a gun up behind the tank where no one will think to look. You excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and get the gun. You come back out you shoot him once. Then you just let your hand drop to your side and the gun slip out. Everyone will still think you've got it. They're gonna be staring at your face, Sketch. So walk out of the place real fast, but you don't run. Don't look nobody directly in the eye, don't don't look away either. They're gonna be scared of you, believe me, so don't worry about nothing. Thanks for the heads up!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bullpen Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 I don't know. Did you ask Clemenza about this plan? He's fixing the trigger on the gun... it's a little too tight still. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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