Orton's Arm Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 Article by: John Doe On the Monday morning after the draft, I drove to the corner of Abbot and Bills Drive to interview Jauron. Instead of taking me into his office, he sat down with me in a quiet corner. Interviewer: Could you touch on the Bills' plans for Toronto? Jauron: We just want to keep our options open, rather than painting ourselves into a corner. Interviewer: Describe the preparation that goes into the draft. Jauron: We send scouts to the four corners of the earth to search for football talent. Interviewer: How soon before some of those draft picks become regular contributors on offense and defense? Jauron: Big days from our draft picks are just around the corner. Interviewer: What's the one thing you look for the most in a draft pick? Jauron: When you talk to him, does he look you in the eye, or do his eyes wander to every corner of the room? Everything else is secondary. Interviewer: You've gone 7-9 in each of the previous two seasons in Buffalo. How do you think you'll do this year? Jauron: I think we'll turn the corner. Interviewer: The Dolphins have improved themselves in the off-season. How do you think you'll do against them? Jauron: We've got them backed into a corner. (The corners of his mouth curved upward in a smile when he said this.) Interviewer: Describe your relationship with Bills' fans. Jauron: I'm glad they're in our corner. Interviewer: Head coaches get paid pretty well, and it must be nice to be able to afford any car you want. What's the single most important feature you look for in a car? Jauron: How well it handles corners. Interviewer: Your attention seems to be focused on a particular position. Would you care to elaborate on that? Jauron: No. Interviewer: Why not? Jauron: Because I'd feel like I was cornered. Interviewer: What's your least favorite shape? Jauron: The circle. Interviewer: Why? Jauron: Because a circle doesn't have any . . . oh, never mind.
Orton's Arm Posted May 2, 2008 Author Posted May 2, 2008 If you're going to use an emoticon, why not one that involves looking at someone out of the corner of your eye?
Stl Bills Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 If you're going to use an emoticon, why not one that involves looking at someone out of the corner of your eye?
Orton's Arm Posted May 2, 2008 Author Posted May 2, 2008 Excellent! Your post is the exact opposite of cowering in some corner.
PNW_Bills_Fan Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 Excellent! Your post is the exact opposite of cowering in some corner. HMMMMMMM Nah not worth a comment!
2020 Our Year For Sure Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 Good stuff. "The way it handles corners."
Bleed Bills Blue Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 Dick is so low-key...I think we should bring in a top-notch coroner to see if he's breathing.
Bullpen Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 If you're going to use an emoticon, why not one that involves looking at someone out of the corner of your eye? I thought it was kinda funny... How 'bout this one then:
Orton's Arm Posted May 2, 2008 Author Posted May 2, 2008 HMMMMMMM Nah not worth a comment! Are you, perhaps, trying to imply that I didn't do any better than some kid working at the corner store would have done?
2020 Our Year For Sure Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 pretty corny, if you ask me... Well played...
Orton's Arm Posted May 2, 2008 Author Posted May 2, 2008 Well played... Hey! Wait a minute! I thought I had the market for that kind of humor pretty much cornered! Thanks, by the way, to everyone who complimented me.
Beerball Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 Thanks, by the way, to everyone who complimented me. No, no, no, no, no thank you for not including me in the above group.
eball Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 You labeled this thread "(Humor)" -- if I were a paying customer I'd be asking for my money back.
bigskyfan Posted May 2, 2008 Posted May 2, 2008 well dick jeuron is a low-key guy, but if the bills finally make the playoffs this year he would have to be regarded as the cornerstone of their success
Sisyphean Bills Posted May 3, 2008 Posted May 3, 2008 Dick Jauron has the coaching genius market cornered.
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