erynthered Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 So you think it is right to pay soldiers crap pay? I might be a phucking retard, but you see them as cheap paid tools and then hold them high on a pedestal, what gives?... They should be getting paid a lot more than my lazy gov't ass gets... But, you don't think so! At least kiss them first Eryn before you eff them... Yes. Thats exactly what I said, and meant. God you're an idiot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 Yes. Thats exactly what I said, and meant. God you're an idiot. Yep... I am an idiot, go slower next time. Glad you agree that they should pay our soldiers at least what a blue-collar, wage grade federal employee makes in pay and benny's... Good for you Eryn... A true patriot you are! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
erynthered Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 Yep... I am an idiot, go slower next time. Glad you agree that they should pay our soldiers at least what a blue-collar, wage grade federal employee makes in pay and benny's... Good for you Eryn... A true patriot you are! Where did I say any of this? This is why I call you an idiot. You put words into other peoples mouth's Knock it off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
/dev/null Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 I might be a phucking retard There's no might about it. You post here don't you Welcome to the club. Timmah! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 There's no might about it. You post here don't you Welcome to the club. Timmah! Okay... What is the secret handshake? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 Where did I say any of this? This is why I call you an idiot. You put words into other peoples mouth'sKnock it off. No. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
erynthered Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 No. Assshole Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 My brother was diagnosed with PTSD after coming back from Afghanistan last year, his third tour in the GWOT after also serving in Bosnia, etc. There were marital problems before he even got back.... We tried to reach out to his now-ex-wife during the deployment and rarely got a response and it turned out she'd been cheating --- the third-oldest story in the book. She complained that he didn't call her enough and othersuch bullsh-- like that (he was stuck eating goat in villages where no one had ever seen an American before... some people really don't ing get it!), trying to rationalize her selfishness (which was only confirmed by her --- out of the blue --- withdrawing his entire savings account balance "to protect herself" and further in the divorce negotiations). You can talk all you want about $, but the most weighing thing on the men and women serving 'over there' is leaving their lives in limbo back here and not being able to do much of a damn thing about it. It's a hell of a thing to come back and be a stranger in your own home. Combine that with all the things he had to do like shooting people who didn't pull their cars over for convoys, drawing O+ on every piece of your clothing, that mental state you get in when you can imagine what your own death might be like, including days when he, as an E-8 volunteered for Humvee gunner duty, actually hoped to die.... This sh-- stays with you. You don't just shake it off. Same damn thing actually happened to a guy in his unit. At the funeral the wife and kids cried, etc. but the quotes from them in the newspapers just seemed off-color, like 'Oh well. These things happen.' I remember myself thinking it very odd at the time and then got the full story when my brother returned home that this KIA was tantamount to suicide. People back here, even in the families of the soldiers, have NO CLUE. A 20-year non-comm who'd somehow never been deployed before asked him what to expect... Ninety percent of the guys in his unit have been divorced w/in a year of returning from a deployment, many of whom have small children and are getting utterly shafted in divorces. 11 out of 15 of the kids in his old platoon failed a drug test last month. It's unbelievable the human toll that's being levied. I have taken to just listening to what he has to say. Speaking, writing about what he went through that got him to where he is now is probably the best therapy there is. So I listen. He stayed here off-and-on for about 2 months while he was closing on a new house. He broke a halogen lamp during one flashback nightmare, would often shout in his sleep (at 4 a.m., mind you... when he did manage any sleep), and he's making gross mistakes in his personal life --- drinking, trying to reclaim/replace what he had with his wife including the same kind of dog (which he was not ready to take care of) and dating someone who was her spitting image, then moving to her place, moving out, then back in, then back out, then back in, then back out. I try not to judge and to just be there for him. At times it's like watching the seconds before a car accident, and you want to scream out to prevent it but they just won't hear you. Things now seem to be getting back on track, tho, but it's a daily struggle. That sucks. I hope your brother gets better. He is better off without that pathetic wife of his. I wish him the best. My buddy did a few tours and he lived with the girl he loved for 7 years. While he was over there my scumbag ex-boss, father of 5 who puts up this facade that he is a church going, moral person- he started an affair with my buddies girl. My buddy got three different concussions. He received an honorable discharge and a purple heart. He too has PTSD. When we are out sometimes he hears a noise and goes into a roll, other times he gets startled and needs to get out. He is messed up from the war, and he is messed up from his girl. He is a tough kid and crazy now, and a few times he went after my POS ex-boss- but was it was broken up. I would be afraid if I were the POS, and he deserves whatever is coming his way. But I hope my buddy does not do something stupid. He is not right in the head right now. If I were fighting for my country and my "friend" had an affair with my girl- I would beat him to death Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 Assshole That's MR. Assshole to you! Lighten up Francis... A little too would, I understand that or I would go tell you to go eat a bowl of phuck. Wow... The new kinder, gentle EIL. Gotta love it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
/dev/null Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 Okay... What is the secret handshake? linky Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 My brother was diagnosed with PTSD after coming back from Afghanistan last year, his third tour in the GWOT after also serving in Bosnia, etc. There were marital problems before he even got back.... We tried to reach out to his now-ex-wife during the deployment and rarely got a response and it turned out she'd been cheating --- the third-oldest story in the book. She complained that he didn't call her enough and othersuch bullsh-- like that (he was stuck eating goat in villages where no one had ever seen an American before... some people really don't ing get it!), trying to rationalize her selfishness (which was only confirmed by her --- out of the blue --- withdrawing his entire savings account balance "to protect herself" and further in the divorce negotiations). You can talk all you want about $, but the most weighing thing on the men and women serving 'over there' is leaving their lives in limbo back here and not being able to do much of a damn thing about it. It's a hell of a thing to come back and be a stranger in your own home. Combine that with all the things he had to do like shooting people who didn't pull their cars over for convoys, drawing O+ on every piece of your clothing, that mental state you get in when you can imagine what your own death might be like, including days when he, as an E-8 volunteered for Humvee gunner duty, actually hoped to die.... This sh-- stays with you. You don't just shake it off. Same damn thing actually happened to a guy in his unit. At the funeral the wife and kids cried, etc. but the quotes from them in the newspapers just seemed off-color, like 'Oh well. These things happen.' I remember myself thinking it very odd at the time and then got the full story when my brother returned home that this KIA was tantamount to suicide. People back here, even in the families of the soldiers, have NO CLUE. A 20-year non-comm who'd somehow never been deployed before asked him what to expect... Ninety percent of the guys in his unit have been divorced w/in a year of returning from a deployment, many of whom have small children and are getting utterly shafted in divorces. 11 out of 15 of the kids in his old platoon failed a drug test last month. It's unbelievable the human toll that's being levied. I have taken to just listening to what he has to say. Speaking, writing about what he went through that got him to where he is now is probably the best therapy there is. So I listen. He stayed here off-and-on for about 2 months while he was closing on a new house. He broke a halogen lamp during one flashback nightmare, would often shout in his sleep (at 4 a.m., mind you... when he did manage any sleep), and he's making gross mistakes in his personal life --- drinking, trying to reclaim/replace what he had with his wife including the same kind of dog (which he was not ready to take care of) and dating someone who was her spitting image, then moving to her place, moving out, then back in, then back out, then back in, then back out. I try not to judge and to just be there for him. At times it's like watching the seconds before a car accident, and you want to scream out to prevent it but they just won't hear you. Things now seem to be getting back on track, tho, but it's a daily struggle. Uconn... I have read your post. Just to let you know... I agree, it is not just all about "money." Money is not the be all and end all... But, it helps even when the rest of people's world seems to be disrespectful to them. Great post! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UConn James Posted April 26, 2008 Share Posted April 26, 2008 That sucks. I hope your brother gets better. He is better off without that pathetic wife of his. I wish him the best. My buddy did a few tours and he lived with the girl he loved for 7 years. While he was over there my scumbag ex-boss, father of 5 who puts up this facade that he is a church going, moral person- he started an affair with my buddies girl. My buddy got three different concussions. He received an honorable discharge and a purple heart. He too has PTSD. When we are out sometimes he hears a noise and goes into a roll, other times he gets startled and needs to get out. He is messed up from the war, and he is messed up from his girl. He is a tough kid and crazy now, and a few times he went after my POS ex-boss- but was it was broken up. I would be afraid if I were the POS, and he deserves whatever is coming his way. But I hope my buddy does not do something stupid. He is not right in the head right now. If I were fighting for my country and my "friend" had an affair with my girl- I would beat him to death Yeah. Lots of feelings that are a mixture of anger, fear, constriction, betrayal, .... "Needing to get out" is a thing that I've noticed in almost every vet I know --- many from my family, worked in a construction crew owned by a Nam vet who hired many vets; the person is in a certain place, and if something goes the slightest bit wrong, or it might be an emotional trigger from a combat experience or it might be for no reason at all, they just need(!) to be somewhere else, in another place that is not this spot right now! Kind of like a 'move or die' mentality. I can't explain it any better than that. I remember helping him move out. At times it was like bipolar. We pulled out of the driveway with the UHaul and some c--t on her cellphone cut us off --- he leaned on the horn for (no exaggeration) 2 minutes, flipped her off and said "I'll !@#$ing kill you, B word!" That was a kind of day, for sure. Like I said, it has gotten better with the counseling at the VA and getting back into routine. But he says a lot of the guys aren't getting adequate help. Lot of guys getting into fights, doing drugs, drinking heavily, and some who are just f--ked in the head. On the way to move into his new place, we saw a kid a few times in the back and forth walking at furious pace down the street, in brown PT T-shirt and fatigue pants, unshaven, talking to himself. And the shi--y thing is these people can easily fall through the cracks until they !@#$ up bigtime; but it's impossible to reach them or get them help unless they want help. Uconn... I have read your post. Just to let you know... I agree, it is not just all about "money." Money is not the be all and end all... But, it helps even when the rest of people's world seems to be disrespectful to them. I'm not sure money is even in the top 5 when it comes to what causes the kind of things happening to returning vets. Sure, money is nice to have and it can alleviate some conditional needs; money can buy contentment, but it can't buy happiness and it can't buy mental health. Granted it can factor in to some of the situations of divorce that can lend toward mental health problems, but connecting money to mental health is tenuous at best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ExiledInIllinois Posted April 27, 2008 Share Posted April 27, 2008 I'm not sure money is even in the top 5 when it comes to what causes the kind of things happening to returning vets. Sure, money is nice to have and it can alleviate some conditional needs; money can buy contentment, but it can't buy happiness and it can't buy mental health. Granted it can factor in to some of the situations of divorce that can lend toward mental health problems, but connecting money to mental health is tenuous at best. It is like you say. One also can't get away with paying them a pitance, you are just inviting trouble... Like adding gas to a fire. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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