MartyBall4Buffalo Posted January 18, 2007 Posted January 18, 2007 Got this off aol news thought it was amusing. http://sports.aol.com/nba/story/_a/man-cla...117185009990001 Man Claims Lakers' Brown Stole His Cake Player Allegedly Threw Birthday Treat Before Leaving AP Sports HERMOSA BEACH, Calif. (Jan. 17) - A man walking down the street at bar-closing time with a $190 cake in his arms claimed Los Angeles Lakers center Kwame Brown swiped his birthday treat. But authorities said the cake caper won't be prosecuted. In a police report, Alexander Martinez said he left his 30th birthday celebration at the Shore Restaurant and Lounge at about 1:45AM Saturday with the uneaten 2-by-2-foot cake and walked north toward the Blue 32 nightclub. Martinez told police he first came upon Lakers forward Ronny Turiaf , who he said agreed to pose for a photograph with him and the chocolate cake. But outside of Blue 32, the 6-foot-11, 270-pound Brown came along, grabbed the cake and threw it at Martinez, according to the report. Brown got into a white limousine and left, Martinez claimed in the report, although he didn't suggest any reason for the cake toss. Martinez reported that he then walked up to Lamar Odom as the Lakers forward left Pedone's Pizza and confronted him about the cake, which was splattered on the birthday man's back. A man believed to be Odom's bodyguard pushed Martinez into the street, yelling at him to get away from Odom, the police report said. "Calm down, he didn't do anything," Odom told the man believed to be his bodyguard, the report said. Everyone then went their separate ways and Martinez filed a police report 12 hours later. Detectives presented a possible "grand theft of a person" case to the city attorney's office, which decided not to prosecute. Brown wasn't talking, but Lakers spokesman John Black said the team was aware of the alleged incident and had been told prosecutors were not filing charges. Black had no other comment. The Lakers are on a three-game road trip through Saturday. In July of 2006, a woman accused Brown of sexual assault. The district attorney's office dropped the case after a medical exam of the alleged victim was reviewed and revealed no signs of forcible sexual assault. Brown, averaging 8.7 points and 6.6 rebounds, has been sidelined since spraining his right ankle on Dec. 31. He is expected back in about two weeks. Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. The information contained in the AP news report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or otherwise distributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press. All active hyperlinks have been inserted by AOL. 2007-01-17 18:50:53
Cugalabanza Posted January 18, 2007 Posted January 18, 2007 Detectives presented a possible "grand theft of a person" case... What the hell is that? And what does that have to do with throwing a cake at somebody. Any lawyer will tell you that it is legal to throw baked goods at a person as long as it is funny. This is one of the fundamental laws of comedy. Also, there is legal precedent that it is a perfectly legitimate comedic device to deny throwing baked goods at someone even though everybody knows you did it. This precedent extends to pies, cakes and any sufficiently frosted cupcake-type dessert which is generally deemed capable of ruining someone's fancy good time or otherwise making them look like a silly little jerk.
Phlegm Alley Posted January 18, 2007 Posted January 18, 2007 I think what it means is grand theft not of a person themselves, but of property that they had in their possession that exceeds a certain value. It is pretty !@#$ing funny though, but do I believe him??? Absolutely not. I think he probably dropped the $190 cake, felt bad that he did so, then rolled in it to try and blame some prominent athletes.
stuckincincy Posted January 18, 2007 Posted January 18, 2007 What the hell is that? And what does that have to do with throwing a cake at somebody. Any lawyer will tell you that it is legal to throw baked goods at a person as long as it is funny. This is one of the fundamental laws of comedy. Also, there is legal precedent that it is a perfectly legitimate comedic device to deny throwing baked goods at someone even though everybody knows you did it. This precedent extends to pies, cakes and any sufficiently frosted cupcake-type dessert which is generally deemed capable of ruining someone's fancy good time or otherwise making them look like a silly little jerk. That's true. Soupy Sales was never indicted. And there is also the Twinkie Defense, if somehow, charges are brought. And remember, this man was given a $190, 2ft x 2ft cake...and he didn't share.
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