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Best Christmas Ever


ieatcrayonz

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It is pretty liklely that my Christmas's are better than most everyone elses due to my sheer wealth, but yesterday was the best Christmas I ever had.

 

As the gifts arrive during December I put them under my tree and open them in the morning. I can't tell you the real names of the gift givers but you know them from TV, Sports, Business and other places of fame.

 

They all gave me great gifts for yesterday, but the best gift of all came straight from heaven. Sure, the pictures from London M were ok, the Rolls from the "Rockefemmers" will be good for a Thursday car, and the stock certificates from Gill Bates will be worth a lot, but the best gift was yet to come.

 

As I opened another pair of Goochy shoes from Lou Leffner I heard a rustling under the tree. It is a very big tree and it could be anything under there. I thought it was probably that pathetic Jenny, begging for more after Bradley and Vinny dumped her. I was gong to have to give her my "come back tomorrow, we are closed on Christmas" speech but it wasn't Jenny after all.

 

IT WAS SAMMY. IT WAS SAMMY. There he was, right under my tree. He was a little weak and when he tried to talk and he looked hungry. I scooped him up, hugged him and brought him to his cage. I never had given up hope and kept his cage just like it was when he left. I took some silica from the shoe box Leff gave me and got some water and put it all in his cage.

 

He is sleeping right now but I hope he is regaining his strenth and can still talk. I want to hear about what happened to him.

 

You would think I would be in a great mood and I am, but sure enough, Canada manged to try and ruin my day. I know they don't celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas up there but to they have to ruin everything for us?

 

As I looked in my appointment book for today I noticed that it is "Boxing Day" in Canada. I think this just plain sucks. Christmas is all about peace on Earth. The Christians teach tolerance on Christmas and even to people of other religions like Jews, Islams, Catholics, and Buddahs. Then the Canadians want to ruin it the VERY NEXT DAY by having a holiday for the most violent sport on Earth? What disgusting sabotage. Isn't the world violent enough without encouragement from these toothless cretins? Can't we try to hold on to the Christmas spirit for longer than one day?

 

I won't let them ruin the day for me and Sammy. Don't let them ruin yours either.

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Don't let the Canadians bring you down. As I understand it, Canadian boxing is not very violent at all. It has evolved into a sort of drunken spectacle of homoerotic posturing. The winner is judged, not so much for athletic prowess, but based on the magnificence of his moustache and tight pants.

 

The Aussies celebrate Boxing day too. Many of them lying topless on the beach.

 

:thumbsup:

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Check with Guffalo.  He just spent a couple of weeks over there.  :doh:

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I can certainly attest to the toplessness of the inhabitants of both Bondi and Manly beaches. However this was late October through late November, I can only assume that by Christmas and "all-over-tan" could certainly be possible.

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I can certainly attest to the toplessness of the inhabitants of both Bondi and Manly beaches. However this was late October through late November, I can only assume that by Christmas and "all-over-tan" could certainly be possible.

878674[/snapback]

 

As can I. Spent ANZAC day on Byron Bay with swimming with a bunch of topless teenagers taking the day off from school. Thank god for waist deep water. :doh:

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I can certainly attest to the toplessness of the inhabitants of both Bondi and Manly beaches. However this was late October through late November, I can only assume that by Christmas and "all-over-tan" could certainly be possible.

 

 

As can I. Spent ANZAC day on Byron Bay with swimming with a bunch of topless teenagers taking the day off from school. Thank god for waist deep water. :thumbsup:

Thanks, added them to my list of places to see when we're there in Feb.

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Oooh! Fried eggs! <_<

 

Reminds me of a story. Was working in my Dad's restaurant a long time ago. I was probably 14 or 15. An old guy comes in for breakfast and orders two eggs. I ask how he wants them cooked. He says, "staring at me like a naked lady." I gave him a long confused look after which he responded with, "sunnyside up, boy, sunnyside up!"

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  • 2 weeks later...
Reminds me of a story. Was working in my Dad's restaurant a long time ago. I was probably 14 or 15. An old guy comes in for breakfast and orders two eggs. I ask how he wants them cooked. He says, "staring at me like a naked lady." I gave him a long confused look after which he responded with, "sunnyside up, boy, sunnyside up!"

 

One of those "how do you like your wimmen questions"? :rolleyes:

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