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Lindsay Lohan writes an email

SilverNRed

By SilverNRed
in Off the Wall Archives

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SilverNRed Veteran

SilverNRed

Posted
Posted

Link to the most incoherent text ever (including TSW).

 

Apparently Lohan plans to enlist Al Gore and Bill Clinton to help her stop people from writing "lies" about her. Oh, and this is the "Way of the future." DeLuca could drop acid and make more sense than this.

 

Subject: The way of the future-Howard Hughes once said. I am willing to release a politically/morally correct, fully adequite letter to the press if any of you are willing to help. Simply to state my oppinions on how our society should be educated on for the better of our country. Our people. Also because I have such an impact on our younger generations, as well as generations older than me. Which we all know and can obviously see. People are just mean. I am going to proceed with putting LR to court if need be for what she's done to me. Its my life. I want to live it. People cannot lie and think that it is okay to continue on having done so. Simply because they will do it again to someone else, and that is not alright with me. I have had many ups and downs, as do we all.

 

 

But to make false accusations to one girl is unjust in my oppinion. Having said this, I am willing to do anything I need to get my life the way it should be and the way I work for it to be.. And have thus far in my career. Let's sue the tabloids for saying the things they say. Defamation of character. Amongst other illegal accusations, I will repeat this over and over to make my point. I am not fully aware of what these, again, accusations are, but I am fully and eagerly prepared to learn them. Have harvey and all lawyers help me please. If he is willing. Al Gore will help me he came up to me last night and said he would be very happy to have a conversation with me. If he is willing to help me, let's find out. Hilary Clinton, Bill Clinton, and Evan metroplis, and John Daur who works with them would be willing, if we just ask. If we just ASK. I'd really like to fix things and refuse to stop on any account for these unintelligent, vulgar people who like to hurt other people. Not just me, but everyone. I'm willing to hold a press conference and I will do anything necessary to do so. In putting an end to 'these people' trying to put an end to me and belittle me as well as try to be the demise of me after all I've gone through and done at such a young and tender age in a womans life. Its enough already, I've had enough and I am going to be the one to make a change. For all of my fellow actors, friends, people I admire and for those I've lost in the recent days, years, months. I do believe the focus in the world has misplaced and directed in the wrong directions and I am willing to be the one to help change that and use my celebrity status to move the focalpoint /(s) of the press to the real issues that we have going on as we speak. Anyone that is willing to help and has a family member or friend, even co-worker that is in a position to be involved in any way, shape or form, please contact me, Jenni Muro, Leslie Sloane, Michael Heller, Jason Sloane, Jason Weinberg as soon as you can or are willing. Just ask them, it doesn't hurt to ask. So let's start now, rather than waste time. Do you agree? Because I'm doing it either way. The way of the future. Thank you for your time. Your Entertainer, Lindsay Lohan Sent wirelessly via BlackBerry from T-Mobile.

I put my two favorite parts in bold. I'd like to know how much of this was because of the cocaine and how much was because of the alcohol. :wallbash:

TheMadCap Veteran

TheMadCap

Posted
Posted

"Let's sue the tabloids for saying the things they say. Defamation of character. Amongst other illegal accusations, I will repeat this over and over to make my point. I am not fully aware of what these, again, accusations are, but I am fully and eagerly prepared to learn them. Have harvey and all lawyers help me please."

 

MY favorite part...

apuszczalowski All Pro

apuszczalowski

Posted
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In other words, I want to be rich and famous and do whatever I want, but please don't write anything bad about me or else I will sue you because your mean to me.

 

You want to be able to have the spotlight and be famous, but don't want the bad things that come with it like the lack of privacy and the tabloids making up stories about you. if you don't like it so much, move to wyoming, get a real job working in a store and live a normal life, if not quit bitching because you make millions, can do what you want, but have people wanting to know stuf about you

 

But who would have guessed it, She knows how to write

apuszczalowski All Pro

apuszczalowski

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It's that controversial Paris Hilton Diet (nothing but cocaine, valium, vodka and semen) she's been on.  You'd be a little light-headed too.

860704[/snapback]

Oh great, now SDS is going to be in trouble, she is going to file one of those things where she gets one of those guys she pays who wears a suit to write some papers and go to that old building with the guy with the hammer that can make you pay her money or send you to that place where her daddy lives just because you said something bad about her

ajzepp Hall of Famer

ajzepp

Posted
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It's that controversial Paris Hilton Diet (nothing but cocaine, valium, vodka and semen) she's been on.  You'd be a little light-headed too.

860704[/snapback]

:wallbash:

Cugalabanza All Pro

Cugalabanza

Posted
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Oh great, now SDS is going to be in trouble, she is going to file one of those things where she gets one of those guys she pays who wears a suit to write some papers and go to that old building with the guy with the hammer that can make you pay her money or send you to that place where her daddy lives just because you said something bad about her

860705[/snapback]

:wallbash:

She's so out of her freaking mind! She's about 6 months away from being that crazy old cat-throwing lady from The Simpsons.

BoondckCL Veteran

BoondckCL

Posted
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This is gonna be the BEST. SUICIDE. EVER!

860737[/snapback]

 

:wallbash::w00t::doh:

 

I actually want to hear her ideas about political reform, they have got to be genius.

Nanker Hall of Famer

Nanker

Posted
Posted
It's that controversial Paris Hilton Diet (nothing but cocaine, valium, vodka and semen) she's been on.  You'd be a little light-headed too.

860704[/snapback]

Not to mention, she's a girl and it's a well known fact that girls don't fart.

Lord, the compression has to be something awful.

stuckincincy Hall of Famer

stuckincincy

Posted
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Not to mention, she's a girl and it's a well known fact that girls don't fart.

Lord, the compression has to be something awful.

860977[/snapback]

 

There is an archaic slang term to describe some peoples' attitude and appearance - "pinchfart".

 

It pictures well... :nana:

RuntheDamnBall All Pro

RuntheDamnBall

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Just further proof that we elevate stars far more than they deserve. What has LL done besides act - maybe - in - maybe - two hit movies?

 

I have infinitely more respect for someone like Natalie Portman who put her time in in school not because she had to, but because she felt it would make her a better person and give her another option in life outside of the circus.

ajzepp Hall of Famer

ajzepp

Posted
Posted
Just further proof that we elevate stars far more than they deserve.  What has LL done besides act - maybe - in - maybe - two hit movies?

 

I have infinitely more respect for someone like Natalie Portman who put her time in in school not because she had to, but because she felt it would make her a better person and give her another option in life outside of the circus.

860997[/snapback]

 

I love Natalie Portman :nana:

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