OT - How hard would it be...

[Cripes]

This has to be the oddest advice column letter ever written. From slate.com, it's about a guy who is in love with a girl...but he's since found HE killed her father in in a stupid roadside stunt he did when he was 12. (and was never caught): :

 

I Killed My Lover's Dad with an Ear of Corn

 

Dear Prudence,

I have fallen in love with a woman I knew from childhood and ran into again after not seeing her for 20 years. As kids we hardly noticed each other, but when we met again after all these years we felt an immediate attraction. The problem is that when I was 12 years old I did something terrible that caused an accident that killed her father. No one ever found out it was me and I've never told anyone after all these years. I feel horrible about what happened, but it was a long time ago and I've gotten on with my life. But now what? Should I tell this woman that I caused her father's death many years ago? I'm afraid it would ruin our relationship and we love each other a great deal. The accident occurred when I was in a cornfield at night—we were throwing corn at cars when they drove by. We couldn't see the cars because we were hidden in the field. An ear of corn I threw went through the open car window and struck her father in the head, causing him to lose control of the car and crash into a tree. I ran from the scene and was never implicated.

 

—Guilty and Confused

 

Dear Guilty,

History and literature are full of great loves doomed because of circumstance and fate. I'm afraid that being responsible for the death of your girlfriend's father—and having kept this terrible fact a secret—adds you to the list. You are contemplating keeping quiet in order to keep the girl. That is cruel and untenable. Do you hold her hand and nod sympathetically every time she says, "After my father died …"? You cannot build a healthy relationship on such deceit. You mentioned there was at least one other person with you in the field. Imagine how your girlfriend would feel if whoever was with you that night finds out about your romance and sends her a letter about what you did. There's no undoing the heartbreak caused by your childhood prank, but you have the power to at least answer the question for this woman (and her family) about what happened to her father that night. Telling her is the right and moral thing, and you have to accept that doing so in all likelihood will cause her to end your relationship. Before you tell, you also need to be prepared for the legal consequences of confessing. I talked to several law professors and they all said you should consult an attorney to find out your possible criminal and civil liability (and just to add to your dilemma, each said if you came to them as a client, they would advise you to keep your mouth shut). If you do decide that you can keep the secret and still live with yourself, then you must break off the romance. Her father died because of what you did accidentally; don't destroy your own decency because of what you're doing deliberately.

 

 

 

What are the odds this has just outed himself? He was a little light on the details (like, does she think it was just an accident?). But I bet the truth likely came out when the cops probably found an ear of corn in the floorboard of the dead guy's car, and there were a dozen complaints that night about kids throwing corn at cars. Two plus two. Think of all the cops, newspaper readers, family members, etc., who remember some freaky accident like this -- and how easily the cops could figure out who this guy is. "Ma'am, we've found out who threw that corn at your father 20 years ago. Who do you sleep with?"

 

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What a corny story