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Posted

Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" & "My Life" by Bill Clinton. One smart ass student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories.

 

Titanic: $29.99

Clinton: $29.99

 

Titanic: Over 3 hours to read

Clinton: Over 3 hours to read

 

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

 

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.

Clinton: Bill is a bull sh-- artist.

 

Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.

Clinton: Ditto for Bill.

 

Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.

Clinton: Ditto for Monica.

 

Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.

Clinton: Let's not go there.

 

Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.

Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.

 

Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.

Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

 

Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.

Clinton: Monica...ooh, let's not go there, either.

 

Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.

Clinton: Bill goes home to Hillary...basically the same thing.

Posted
Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" & "My Life" by Bill Clinton. One smart ass student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories.

 

Titanic: $29.99

Clinton: $29.99

 

Titanic: Over 3 hours to read

Clinton: Over 3 hours to read

 

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

 

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.

Clinton: Bill is a bull sh-- artist.

 

Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.

Clinton: Ditto for Bill.

 

Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.

Clinton: Ditto for Monica.

 

Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.

Clinton: Let's not go there.

 

Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.

Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.

 

Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.

Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

 

Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.

Clinton: Monica...ooh, let's not go there, either.

 

Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.

Clinton: Bill goes home to Hillary...basically the same thing.

590300[/snapback]

:(;):lol:

Posted

Pretty funny! The other night, on the "Daily Show" recap of the state of the union address, the camera panned to Hillary in the audience, with a disapproving look on her face ....the picture freezes, John Stewart says "Where boners go to die..."

 

 

It was one of the funniest things I had seen in a while...

Posted
Pretty funny!  The other night, on the "Daily Show" recap of the state of the union address, the camera panned to Hillary in the audience, with a disapproving look on her face ....the picture freezes, John Stewart says "Where boners go to die..."

It was one of the funniest things I had seen in a while...

593101[/snapback]

I laughed pretty hard at that too.

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