The OFFICIAL American Idol 2006 Thread

[ajzepp]

Thats it. I love that song too. That kind of music must sound great on your high falutin stereo system.

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lol, right you are....that's exactly the sort of thing that tends to sound best on a good system. It can really approach a live performance if it's a good recording. Borders had a free Bocelli sampler disc last time I was there, but there were none left I would have loved to see how good the recording was, and then maybe purchase one of his CDs. But yeah, that duet with Brightman was beautiful.....both amazing talents.

 

In fact, I think AI should do musical night.....let them sing some of the more popular stuff from the better musicals. You could have one of my favorite singers - Sam Harris - come and pull a 'barry'. He's been on Broadway for years and has a really good, powerful voice. I think it's especially pertinent, cause two of the contestants from the show are on Broadway right now - Diana DeGarmo and Jennifer Hudson. It's clearly a genre that is viable for someone like Katharine, and maybe a couple of the others.

 

And I definitely agree about Stones night, too That would ROCK

[Tcali]

The moment we’ve all been waiting for has finally arrived.  The Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes science experiment has produced a silent scream and a baby girl.  Reports are daughter and human incubator are doing just swell.  They’ve named the little bundle of joy “Suri”, which I’m told means “red rose” in Persian, “princess” in Hebrew, and “Devourer of Worlds” in Alpha-Centaurian.  So, while Tom munches away on his placenta sandwich, and reptilian stormtroopers whisk away the vessel formerly known as Katie Holmes, we’ll toast the newest “Louise Brown”-esque addition to the third rock from the sun and make fun of some lesser known singing bags of meat.

 

Idol has deemed it necessary to eliminate all of the interesting contestants, leaving us with boring wannabes of varying shades of the same water-colored talent.  This makes it pretty freaking hard to dole out the trashy comments and anecdotes, and we’ve almost burned through our entire copy of “The Big Book of Entertainment Clichés, Innuendos, and Insults” with a month-and-a-half of top-notch AI programming left.  But, I’m willing to pour a Cocktail, take on this Mission Impossible and keep the Collateral damage to a minimum, if you’ll promise that there’ll be no Risky Business on your end (groan).

 

It’s Rod “The Mod” Stewart night on Idol.  I’m not a huge fan of the guy who sang “Young Turks” and “Do you want my Body”, and I mostly remember him for loudly-colored hot pants and the mid-70s rumor about him going to the ER to have a gallon of semen pumped from his stomach.  Questionable dietary proclivities aside, he’s another old singer who’s got a new-ish CD collection out, so in the minds of the AI producers he’s a perfect choice to trot out before a group of kids who don’t know him and don’t want his feedback, but will pretend this is the greatest moment of their lives and he’s been their jukebox hero the whole time they were growing up.  To further reduce his relevance to the show, the Idol kids can only pick covers of old classics that he sang and released on the collection.  But, whatever the reason was for knocking on his crypt door and inviting him on the show, we’re stuck with him and his bad dye-job, so here we go….

 

Chris Daughtry "What a Wonderful World":

Pretty easy song-choice for Ed Kowalczyk, I mean Chris Daughtry.  I thought it was a bit weak, as I prefer the versions done by Joey Ramone and The Flaming Lips.  But the judges thought he was great (big surprise there…the ushers had to mop under Paula’s chair during the break), and this Top Gun is undoubtedly safe.

 

Holy Cow!?!  A Marilu Henner sighting!  Must be a new Fox miniseries in the works about a used up divorcee getting passed around like a party favor on the set of a sitcom.  Bottoms up, Marilu.

 

Paris Bennett "These Foolish Things”:

Little Miss Thing got to do The Ryan Seacrest Interview before she sang, and we got to see Little Miss Thing’s mom shed some tears (yawn).  Her salmon (silent “L”, for the Pickler-posse) colored dress was a welcome change from last week’s frightening bondage get-up, and she nailed the song.  Unfortunately the Report on this Minority is someone’s gotta be in the bottom three, and I wouldn’t be shocked if she was forced to stand in the Spotlight of Anxiety this week.. 

 

Talyor Hicks "You Send Me":

Taylor looked mighty old standing next to the vampire playboy Rod The Mod, and it’s a testament to Rod’s plastic surgeon and all the blood he sucked out of Rachel Hunter that he looks so damned good for his age.  Compared to Manilow’s “taut as the head of a drum” face and Kenny Rogers’ weathered visage, Rod looked positively youthful.  Hicks’ rendition of the Sam Cook hit was pretty dull until about halfway through when he panicked and started to bust out the seizure-inspired gyrations he’s known for.  That probably saved his fat ass, because even though he showed he could in fact sing a little tonight, the audience doesn’t want Taylor Hicks…they want a drunken Chris Farley imitator.  He made All The Right Moves, and he’s safe.

 

Elliott Yamin “It Had to Be You”:

It has to be someone, all right.  And this week it could be Elliot to hit the road.  His singing was ok…(he got to toss in his signature Yo MTV Raps Karate Chop) but it had an MS telethon feel to it.  Replace the band with C-level “stars” manning the phone-banks and trot out a few kids, and he could have been Jerry Lewis minus the sweat and the ring around the collar.  Vanilla “Sky” Ice could be in the bottom three, and very well could be singing The Song of Shame as a lead-in to your local news.

 

Mimi Rogers!!!!! Nice to see one of Cruise’s former beards in the audience on a night when his Offspring of the Damned emerges.  Serendipity abounds!

 

Kelli Pickler “Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered”:

Rod The Mod said she had great personality, which in the entertainment biz means “She’s an idiot, but she’s got good looks.”  How many Kelli Pickler’s (and A Few Good Men) has Rod Stewart used up in the course of his career?  Hundreds?  Thousands?  Rod knows how she got this far, and he knows it’s got nothing to do with what comes out of her mouth.  To prove the point that her fans aren’t voting for her because of her singing ability, girlfriend didn’t bother to sing at all, then batted her eye lashes and apologized for butchering it.  She’s almost daring you to not vote for her at this point.  She could end up in the bottom three this week, but it’s hard to believe that she won’t advance.

 

Ace Young “That's All”:

Ace cleaned up, wore a suit, pulled his hair back into a Last Samurai-like do, and added a lip quiver to his repertoire.  Now we have “gaze longingly”, “pout”, and “quivering lip” to look forward to until he’s eliminated, which could come this week, but probably won’t because America is stupid. 

 

Last up, the Kat the wasn’t kidnapped and impregnated by aliens….

Katherine McFee “Someone to Watch Over Me”:

She looked stunning, as usual, and totally nailed her song.  She is Far and Away the best singer in the competition and should win the whole thing, which means the producers of AI will put her in the bottom three again to induce hysteria in the voters next week.

 

The big winner tonight was Rod Stewart, who got to show off his trophy fiancée and new (normally conceived) son, and let us see that he’s never suffered from the effects of swallowing Mr. Microphone.

 

The real loser tonight is Katie “there’s no place like home…there’s no place like home” Holmes whose purpose is now over and is being dragged away from her posh lifestyle to get chained to a dungeon wall.

 

Bottom three:

Tough call…everyone but Pickler showed up tonight.  I’ll say Paris, Elliot and Ace get to stand under the hot lights, and Elliot gets booted .  I’ve been wrong almost every week, though, which means I thankfully can’t find the musical pulse of the viewers.

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Jonny------well done ..well done..gracias

[Rico]

Anybody but Daughtry & McFunbags as the final two would be a letdown.

 

BTW...I am the only one who feels that the theme nights suck this year?  Kenny Rogers, Rod Stewart(singing old songs), Bocelli, Barry Manilow?  Pick up the tempo and give Spaz something to get excited about...

 

50's night(The Twist)

Beatles night(Helter Skelter)

Stones night(Jumpin' Jack Flash)

Buddy Holly night(Rave On)

 

Now Spaz doing these songs would be "must see TV".

 

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I agree with you that those are the Final 2,

but I think Spazz vs. Pickler would be hard to beat for laughs!

If they had a Beatles night, Spaz would have to do I Am The Walrus (Goo Goo Ga Joob)

[Rico]

What does that have to do with my post? lol  You just making random statements about the show now?  

666511[/snapback]

Doesn't matter, it just adds to the post count.

 

3 away from 666.

[ajzepp]

 

I agree with you that those are the Final 2,

but I think Spazz vs. Pickler would be hard to beat for laughs!

If they had a Beatles night, Spaz would have to do I Am The Walrus (Goo Goo Ga Joob)

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LOL, there is a SNL sketch in there with the Spazz vs. Pickler thing.....that's got a LOT of potential

[ajzepp]

Doesn't matter, it just adds to the post count.  

 

3 away from 666.

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Dang, we're on page thirty fuggin FOUR, LOL I didn't even realize

[GoodBye]

Dang, we're on page thirty fuggin FOUR, LOL  I didn't even realize 

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There are also over 10,000 views!

[LabattBlue]

There are also over 10,000 views!

666685[/snapback]

This is because we aren't a bunch of LAMP'ers who need to start new threads on the same subject over and over again.

[Acantha]

This is because we aren't a bunch of LAMP'ers who need to start new threads on the same subject over and over again. 

667184[/snapback]

Well, this IS the "official" thread. Any other would just be pathetic.

[GoodBye]

This is because we aren't a bunch of LAMP'ers who need to start new threads on the same subject over and over again. 

667184[/snapback]

Good point! I hear that happens a lot over on the main board which I don't visit too often.

[Rico]

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

[ajzepp]

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

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Is that Paris???? She NEVER looks that hot....lol

[Rico]

Is that Paris????  She NEVER looks that hot....lol

668291[/snapback]

Here's a better one:

Kellie Pickler's Prom Picture

[ajzepp]

Here's a better one:

Kellie Pickler's Prom Picture

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wow, you know you'd hit that in a NY minute

[Alaska Darin]

Here's a better one:

Kellie Pickler's Prom Picture

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Thank God for not having daughters. No way I'd let my daughter go to a prom in that outfit. Bet she won "First Whore."

[Rico]

McFunbags bringing out the guns tonight!

Where's my freeze frame?

[cåblelady]

I've voted for Chris 4 times already tonight. I've never voted before. This is fun.

[Rico]

I vote for Paula's drugs, I want some of that stuff she was on tonight.

[cåblelady]

OK......I got thru 8 times. I'm done.

[ajzepp]

Did anyone else get the impression that there was some issue they had with David Foster?? I've never seen them hack on the arrangement so much before. Simon even said that Katharine got 'bad advice' I wonder if something happened that pissed them off or something.

 

McPhee was looking DAMN hot tonight, though....wowza