Jack_USN Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 1. Teddy Bruschi showed me a video of him making love to my wife, and it was the most beautiful thing I ever saw. 2. I was once in the back of a pickup truck with Teddy Bruschi and a dead deer. Bruschi went up to the deer and said "Im Teddy Bruschi..SAY IT!" Then he manipulates the deers lips in such a way as to say Teddy Bruschi. It wasn't perfect. But it was pretty good for a deer. 3. His favorite movie is One on One with Robby Benson. 4. He once punched a hole in a cow to see who was coming up the road. 5. He orchestrated the merger of UNICEF and Smith & Wesson. 6. He went public with his own buttocks and made $7 million. 7. His poop is used as currency in Argentina. 8. Did I ever tell you about the time Bruschi went hunting. Bruschi decides he is going to hunt down all four banana splits. He stalks and kills every one of them with a machete..They all begged for their lives, except Fleagle. 9. We once had a bachelor party for Teddy Bruschi. He ate the entire cake before we could tell him there was a stripper inside it. 10. He has a toenail on the end of his penis. 11. They use Bruschi's foreskin as a tarp to cover the field at Fenway Park. 12. He once breast fed a flamingo back to health. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Navy Chief Navy Pride Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 We're not worthy!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. K Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 Hilarious and surreal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan Gross Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 What a "Dawgged" post... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnny Coli Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 10. He has a toenail on the end of his penis. 498393[/snapback] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buffalo Baumer Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 That is THE FUNNIEST post I have EVER read!!!! Nice Work!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TigerJ Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 I thought you were going to say the deer came back to life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NavyBillsFan Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 Where you stationed at Jack? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawgg Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 This is the funniest post I have ever read. THE funniest. And no, TeddyB jokes do not get old. They never do!!!!! What a "Dawgged" post... 498477[/snapback] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dean Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 1. Teddy Bruschi showed me a video of him making love to my wife, and it was the most beautiful thing I ever saw. 2. I was once in the back of a pickup truck with Teddy Bruschi and a dead deer. Bruschi went up to the deer and said "Im Teddy Bruschi..SAY IT!" Then he manipulates the deers lips in such a way as to say Teddy Bruschi. It wasn't perfect. But it was pretty good for a deer. 3. His favorite movie is One on One with Robby Benson. 4. He once punched a hole in a cow to see who was coming up the road. 5. He orchestrated the merger of UNICEF and Smith & Wesson. 6. He went public with his own buttocks and made $7 million. 7. His poop is used as currency in Argentina. 8. Did I ever tell you about the time Bruschi went hunting. Bruschi decides he is going to hunt down all four banana splits. He stalks and kills every one of them with a machete..They all begged for their lives, except Fleagle. 9. We once had a bachelor party for Teddy Bruschi. He ate the entire cake before we could tell him there was a stripper inside it. 10. He has a toenail on the end of his penis. 11. They use Bruschi's foreskin as a tarp to cover the field at Fenway Park. 12. He once breast fed a flamingo back to health. 498393[/snapback] This whole Bruschi thing...and especially this post, remind me of the SNL skit with John Goodman when the guys are in the bar singing the praises of a guy who's name escapes me (but it sounds a LOT like Brew-ski). I think this is lifted directly from than skit...no? Good job, either way, BTW> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gavin in Va Beach Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 This whole Bruschi thing...and especially this post, remind me of the SNL skit with John Goodman when the guys are in the bar singing the praises of a guy who's name escapes me (but it sounds a LOT like Brew-ski). I think this is lifted directly from than skit...no? Good job, either way, BTW> 498596[/snapback] To Bill Brasky! Second: Did I ever tell you about the time Bill Brasky sold me into slavery? First: Well, if you're talking about Bill Brasky, I believe it! Second: Oh, yeah! He puts me on a ship to Thailand, right? And I'm chained to a pipe. Meanwhile, ol' Brasky, he's back in the States siring three beautiful children with my wife! First: I hate Bill Brasky.. but I respect him! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dean Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 To Bill Brasky! Second: Did I ever tell you about the time Bill Brasky sold me into slavery? First: Well, if you're talking about Bill Brasky, I believe it! Second: Oh, yeah! He puts me on a ship to Thailand, right? And I'm chained to a pipe. Meanwhile, ol' Brasky, he's back in the States siring three beautiful children with my wife! First: I hate Bill Brasky.. but I respect him! 498611[/snapback] Dat's it! Thank you so much! Jack's post reminds me so much of that sketch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gavin in Va Beach Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 To Bill Brasky! Second: Did I ever tell you about the time Bill Brasky sold me into slavery? First: Well, if you're talking about Bill Brasky, I believe it! Second: Oh, yeah! He puts me on a ship to Thailand, right? And I'm chained to a pipe. Meanwhile, ol' Brasky, he's back in the States siring three beautiful children with my wife! First: I hate Bill Brasky.. but I respect him! 498611[/snapback] Wikipedia Link -Bill Blasky Oh man I'm reading the quotes in tears from laughing so hard... "Did I ever tell you about the time Bill Brasky forced me to wear a woman's bikini around the office? Brasky tears off my clothes and makes me wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily. But at the end of the quarter, I'll be damned if my sales hadn't tripled." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeeRay Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 Yes, Tedy is a great guy. Just this past week at our mid week Bible study (at the Church of Tedy Bruschi and the Latter Day Pats), Tedy himself alluded to some Biblical misconceptions. Now, the one thing that I did not realize that Rev. Tedy set me straight on is that passage of scripture from Matthew 5:5. Rev. Tedy says that in the interpretation from Hebrew to the King James Version, "Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth", should really be "Blessed is the geek: for he shall inherit the earth". Thus, as Rev. Tedy explained, that is why Bill Gates owns practically everything. Bill Gates was God's chosen heir to inherit the earth. Since Tedy shared this with me, a sense of peace and tranquility has engulfed me. My shares in Microsoft have mulitiplied ten fold. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CoachChuckDickerson Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 Wikipedia Link -Bill Blasky Oh man I'm reading the quotes in tears from laughing so hard... "Did I ever tell you about the time Bill Brasky forced me to wear a woman's bikini around the office? Brasky tears off my clothes and makes me wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily. But at the end of the quarter, I'll be damned if my sales hadn't tripled." 498619[/snapback] He wears a live rattlesnake as a condom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clumping platelets Posted November 10, 2005 Share Posted November 10, 2005 I'm honored to have read Jack's post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chilly Posted November 10, 2005 Share Posted November 10, 2005 Tedy Bruschi was once rescued me from a pit of alligators and quicksand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts