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Poop Assessment


Irv

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I should start a new thread, titled "Poop Tests......love em or hate em".

 

I mean, i don't care either way. If someone wants me to **** in a bucket and then inspect it, well have at it buddy. Tell me if you see anything you like in there.

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7 hours ago, Steve O said:

Admittedly I do too. But I save discussion of said analysis for the Dr's office. Where do you draw the discussion line, at a Bills message board? At dinner when there's a lull in the conversation?


You seem constipated.

Edited by Johnny Hammersticks
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On 10/21/2024 at 4:41 PM, Mike in Horseheads said:

Can you imagine working at Coliguard and opening up containers of sh1t all day and running tests on them?  Who has to flush the remains?  when the UPS truck pulls up with pallets of tests who gets them in mail room and dollops them out?

Deep thoughts here making me appreciate my gig now. 

5 hours ago, Mike in Horseheads said:

Imagine the conversation in the breakroom at the Coliguard plant,  Yup I got another one that had corn last night.

…As he slowly picks corn from his teeth

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On 10/21/2024 at 4:17 PM, Irv said:

I admit it.  I analyze almost every poop I take.  I take great pride in a solid, one or two-section, dark brown coil that seems to be more and more elusive as I age.  I will even try to use as little TP as possible to get a good look.  If you don't do it, you should!

 

I too am a Poop Analyst

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On 10/22/2024 at 10:46 PM, Mike in Horseheads said:

At least the other person saying, you think thats bad I got one that I thought was hemorrhaging but it was just beets

 

That was my uncle.  Years ago, thought he had blood in his stool.  Nope, it was the entire can of pickled beets he had eaten the night before. 

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On 10/21/2024 at 4:41 PM, Mike in Horseheads said:

Can you imagine working at Coliguard and opening up containers of sh1t all day and running tests on them?  Who has to flush the remains?  when the UPS truck pulls up with pallets of tests who gets them in mail room and dollops them out?

 

It’s a ***** job.

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On 10/21/2024 at 4:41 PM, Mike in Horseheads said:

Can you imagine working at Coliguard and opening up containers of sh1t all day and running tests on them?  Who has to flush the remains?  when the UPS truck pulls up with pallets of tests who gets them in mail room and dollops them out?

 

We went to Clearwater FL for a little weekend getaway. After a long day in the hot sun we had to wait in the bar for a spot at a communal dining table. We were drunk and wearing foam hats shaped like antlers and all kinds of crazy stuff. A guy and his wife join us at the table. He’s in town for the bull ***** convention. This led to numerous questions about how the ***** is collected and if you have a favorite bull, that kind of thing. We are in tears! 

 

Before long a young couple on their Honeymoon joins us at the table. I’m quick with “Hi! I’m Augie and this is my wife. We are bankers. This is Bill and Mary. Ask him what he does for a living!”  😂  It turns out the bride has a thing for cows and is wearing some cow themed jewelry. We were just getting started! 

 

After dinner we went to a comedy show, but we laughed much harder at dinner. 

 

 

.

Edited by Augie
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Okay, so we went there.  Cool.  HAHA

 

Years ago (decades ago, frankly), when the "am I hot or not" website became a phenomenon, I randomly joked with friends that there was probably a market for a scat-related "am I pooped or not" website.  They told me that they disagreed, like strongly (I can totally understand why).

 

Then the "rate my poo" website emerged.  Rumor has it that the founder/founders did well as a result of their ad proliferation.

 

We all make mistakes.

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