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Young American men in decline


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4 hours ago, Doc said:

 

We were mostly apolitical for the first half of my sons' lives and areligious (although my in-laws practiced Hinduism so they were around it).  But we raised them to follow the Golden Rule, study hard and with boundaries.  One just started law school and the other is hopefully headed to med school in 2 years.  My mother, a Dem, used to bristle at the way we raised them, but now says we did it right compared to my brother's (used to be a conservative, now a lib and raised his kids that way) kids.

Doc, not another lawyer?😁

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This is an interesting topic that spans across party lines. The issue is real but I suspect there are multiple causes.
 

People now spend more time in internet communities rather than participate in groups, clubs, attend church, etc where they can meet partners. 
 

Some women and men are just very picky with the attitude of “I’m not settling for anyone unless they meet all my requirements.” Many people have superficial standards based upon people’s appearance or financial wealth. Instagram images of perfect people may influence this. 
 

American culture does not celebrate the academic achievements of young people. Sports achievements are what we celebrate as a culture in our high schools and colleges. Meanwhile, the high school nerds are ruling the world. I wonder if this young male problem is present in other cultures which place higher emphasis on academic achievement. 
 

 Obviously as women have more options for employment and careers, they no longer feel a need to be attached to a man for financial support. America has a culture of independence so women are doing what they need to do to not be dependent upon men. I know alot of men who earn less than their professional wives. It’s not a problem if they understand each other. 
 

Young people often move away from home for jobs in distant cities where they are on their own. Student loan debt, stupidly expensive cars, increased housing prices all make it hard for young adults. Child care, if you can find it, is crazy expensive.

If you are worried about your bills, you may not be as interested in finding a partner. As Scott mentions in the video, most of the wealth accumulation has gone towards older generations. We need policies that help all young people. We are leaving our kids with some crappy issues to deal with as we refuse to address hard issues like the federal debt. It’s hard to think that they will be better off financially than previous generations. 


 

 

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1 hour ago, Andy1 said:

This is an interesting topic that spans across party lines. The issue is real but I suspect there are multiple causes.
 

People now spend more time in internet communities rather than participate in groups, clubs, attend church, etc where they can meet partners. 
 

Some women and men are just very picky with the attitude of “I’m not settling for anyone unless they meet all my requirements.” Many people have superficial standards based upon people’s appearance or financial wealth. Instagram images of perfect people may influence this. 
 

American culture does not celebrate the academic achievements of young people. Sports achievements are what we celebrate as a culture in our high schools and colleges. Meanwhile, the high school nerds are ruling the world. I wonder if this young male problem is present in other cultures which place higher emphasis on academic achievement. 
 

 Obviously as women have more options for employment and careers, they no longer feel a need to be attached to a man for financial support. America has a culture of independence so women are doing what they need to do to not be dependent upon men. I know alot of men who earn less than their professional wives. It’s not a problem if they understand each other. 
 

Young people often move away from home for jobs in distant cities where they are on their own. Student loan debt, stupidly expensive cars, increased housing prices all make it hard for young adults. Child care, if you can find it, is crazy expensive.

If you are worried about your bills, you may not be as interested in finding a partner. As Scott mentions in the video, most of the wealth accumulation has gone towards older generations. We need policies that help all young people. We are leaving our kids with some crappy issues to deal with as we refuse to address hard issues like the federal debt. It’s hard to think that they will be better off financially than previous generations. 


 

 

Agree. One real issue the young people have is financial, loaded with student debt then being able to settle down in a home. 50 years ago, the older used 2 bedroom home in a city or town, perhaps what was called war time housing etc, was the place a young couple could start, build some time together, play at life a bit, maybe a child or not, certainly a dog or cat.

Those types of neighborhoods are now gone and off limits. They are crime and drug infested, not a good investment and the young folks expectations of safety and security provided by their parent cannot be met. 

So where do they go to play at marriage, they don’t. They can more safely huddle in groups of male or females, 3 to an apartment and just have FWB. 

Crime and drugs...in my young age I never had to deal with that. 

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16 hours ago, Doc said:

 

We were mostly apolitical for the first half of my sons' lives and areligious (although my in-laws practiced Hinduism so they were around it).  But we raised them to follow the Golden Rule, study hard and with boundaries.  One just started law school and the other is hopefully headed to med school in 2 years.  My mother, a Dem, used to bristle at the way we raised them, but now says we did it right compared to my brother's (used to be a conservative, now a lib and raised his kids that way) kids.

Good for you well done.  

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6 hours ago, Andy1 said:

This is an interesting topic that spans across party lines. The issue is real but I suspect there are multiple causes.
 

People now spend more time in internet communities rather than participate in groups, clubs, attend church, etc where they can meet partners. 
 

Some women and men are just very picky with the attitude of “I’m not settling for anyone unless they meet all my requirements.” Many people have superficial standards based upon people’s appearance or financial wealth. Instagram images of perfect people may influence this. 
 

American culture does not celebrate the academic achievements of young people. Sports achievements are what we celebrate as a culture in our high schools and colleges. Meanwhile, the high school nerds are ruling the world. I wonder if this young male problem is present in other cultures which place higher emphasis on academic achievement. 
 

 Obviously as women have more options for employment and careers, they no longer feel a need to be attached to a man for financial support. America has a culture of independence so women are doing what they need to do to not be dependent upon men. I know alot of men who earn less than their professional wives. It’s not a problem if they understand each other. 
 

Young people often move away from home for jobs in distant cities where they are on their own. Student loan debt, stupidly expensive cars, increased housing prices all make it hard for young adults. Child care, if you can find it, is crazy expensive.

If you are worried about your bills, you may not be as interested in finding a partner. As Scott mentions in the video, most of the wealth accumulation has gone towards older generations. We need policies that help all young people. We are leaving our kids with some crappy issues to deal with as we refuse to address hard issues like the federal debt. It’s hard to think that they will be better off financially than previous generations. 


 

 

When I read this line from your post Some women and men are just very picky with the attitude of “I’m not settling for anyone unless they meet all my requirements.” I thought of this joke.

 

 

image.png.95b362d301736c18515801c1490ee1eb.png

Edited by All_Pro_Bills
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6 hours ago, Niagara Bill said:

Those types of neighborhoods are now gone and off limits. They are crime and drug infested, not a good investment and the young folks expectations of safety and security provided by their parent cannot be met. 

And that's partly driven by the desire for homes much larger than the one I grew up in. Maybe we need to bring back the 1,100 sq ft starter home?

 

6 hours ago, Niagara Bill said:

Crime and drugs...in my young age I never had to deal with that.

Not sure when you grew up, but the late 70s/early 80s of my youth weren't exactly known for lack of drugs and crime.

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3 hours ago, All_Pro_Bills said:

When I read this line from your post Some women and men are just very picky with the attitude of “I’m not settling for anyone unless they meet all my requirements.” I thought of this joke.

 

 

image.png.95b362d301736c18515801c1490ee1eb.png


It’s even sadder when you get to your mid/late 30’s and start meeting women who divorced their husband but readily admit he was a good man and good father… they just wanted “more”.  
 

Now they’re 35 years old with kids and think all the 35-45 year old men are going to want them…

 

We do.. as a hook up, while we search for a younger woman who has never been married & still wants kids.  They quickly realize the men they want aren’t trying to commit to them.

 

So they just become single moms, co-parenting kids, who get into situationships with men who see them as a recreational option until the guy ghosts them or they finally tire of being strung along and go find another guy who is going to do the same thing. 
 

This is what nobody wants to tell them, because how dare our culture speak realities to women’s empowerment, but it’s very .. very real. 
 

Men aren’t without fault, we own a lot of societal relationship issues as well… but with the advent and rise of online dating/apps.. the power men have has drastically lowered for 90% of the population. 
 

 

Edited by SCBills
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3 hours ago, The Frankish Reich said:

And that's partly driven by the desire for homes much larger than the one I grew up in. Maybe we need to bring back the 1,100 sq ft starter home?

 

Not sure when you grew up, but the late 70s/early 80s of my youth weren't exactly known for lack of drugs and crime.

Earlier times  I was the perfect age for the British Invasion, mixed with Jan and Dean, early Dylan and even Wilmer Alexander and the Dukes.

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