EasternOHBillsFan Posted January 6 Posted January 6 (edited) My sister, in the middle of a contentious divorce, received the terrible news that her childhood friend is dying of liver failure at 42. I knew him even though I was older through our church, and he is in hospice now. For many years, he has basically been drinking himself to death because of a secret he could not face as an employee of a Christian school and churchgoer, which is that he was homosexual. This isn't about religion or sexual orientation, but a human being who felt so terrible about this that he drank an insane amount of alcohol which led to liver failure at 42 years old. If you are a person that drinks to excess daily to ease your pain, you don't need to respond to this, just read... PEOPLE CARE ABOUT YOU AND YOU CAN REACH OUT WITH ZERO JUDGMENT. YOUR LIFE MEANS SOMETHING. LET PEOPLE HELP YOU BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE. Please... If you know someone who has drank to excess daily in the past and say they are good, follow up with them... don't take their words at face value. Check them out. You may just save a life. Edited January 6 by EasternOHBillsFan 5 2 3 Quote
muppy Posted January 6 Posted January 6 33 minutes ago, EasternOHBillsFan said: My sister, in the middle of a contentious divorce, received the terrible news that her childhood friend is dying of liver failure at 42. I knew him even though I was older through our church, and he is in hospice now. For many years, he has basically been drinking himself to death because of a secret he could not face as an employee of a Christian school and churchgoer, which is that he was homosexual. This isn't about religion or sexual orientation, but a human being who felt so terrible about this that he drank an insane amount of alcohol which led to liver failure at 42 years old. If you are a person that drinks to excess daily to ease your pain, you don't need to respond to this, just read... PEOPLE CARE ABOUT YOU AND YOU CAN REACH OUT WITH ZERO JUDGMENT. YOUR LIFE MEANS SOMETHING. LET PEOPLE HELP YOU BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE. Please... If you know someone who has drank to excess daily in the past and say they are good, follow up with them... don't take their words at face value. Check them out. You may just save a life. mental illness or addiction are no joke. The isolation and silence is indeed a symptom of the disease of mental illness. Yeah Drinking cn be the devil I will pray that your writing reaches its intended recipient and beyond . I plan on posting it to my feed. BRAVO by posting this You are practicing what I call Love in Action. Indeed. Gracias. m 1 Quote
EasternOHBillsFan Posted January 6 Author Posted January 6 3 minutes ago, muppy said: mental illness or addiction are no joke. The isolation and silence is indeed a symptom of the disease of mental illness. Yeah Drinking cn be the devil I will pray that your writing reaches its intended recipient and beyond . I plan on posting it to my feed. BRAVO by posting this You are practicing what I call Love in Action. Indeed. Gracias. m Thank you. Alcoholism runs through both sides of my family and I made a decision when I was younger to not drink, and yet now it seems I have been using sugar as a substitute for so long and I now am on a regimen to prevent full blown diabetes, so I am guilty and I needed help and got it. Just trying to prevent more needless death for something that is preventable. 2 Quote
boater Posted January 6 Posted January 6 Alcoholics Anonymous is very successful in getting people off alcohol. https://www.aa.org/ Though, some people find AA is not a fit for them. Some don't like the "belief in a higher power" business, some find AA meetings overwhelming. For those people I suggest looking at Smart Recovery. https://smartrecovery.org/ They have an in-person meeting in Buffalo, and you can also attend several on-line options. Sober life after being a boozer is pretty great. 2 Quote
coloradobillsfan Posted January 6 Posted January 6 My best friend from college, a Bills fan who regularly read and occasionally posted here in this forum, passed away last month from kidney and liver failure from years of alcohol abuse. Even during a recent hospital stay he was told if he didn't drink any more he still stood a decent shot at living a long life. But he couldn't do it. I'm still coming to terms with losing him - it's particularly hard during Bills games because we watched them together going all the way back to the Super Bowl years. Watching the Bills win these last games since he passed has proven difficult for me - I always want them to win but after each game I'm left with that sinking feeling that he's not here to enjoy them with me and I'm almost scared they will make a big run now. Regardless of whether or not you view alcoholism as a disease, please do what you can to help your friends and family avoid this fate, even if it means having the uncomfortable conversations that I'm wishing now I would have had with him. 2 1 Quote
EasternOHBillsFan Posted January 6 Author Posted January 6 24 minutes ago, coloradobillsfan said: My best friend from college, a Bills fan who regularly read and occasionally posted here in this forum, passed away last month from kidney and liver failure from years of alcohol abuse. Even during a recent hospital stay he was told if he didn't drink any more he still stood a decent shot at living a long life. But he couldn't do it. I'm still coming to terms with losing him - it's particularly hard during Bills games because we watched them together going all the way back to the Super Bowl years. Watching the Bills win these last games since he passed has proven difficult for me - I always want them to win but after each game I'm left with that sinking feeling that he's not here to enjoy them with me and I'm almost scared they will make a big run now. Regardless of whether or not you view alcoholism as a disease, please do what you can to help your friends and family avoid this fate, even if it means having the uncomfortable conversations that I'm wishing now I would have had with him. My sister tried to intervene but she really didn't know the extent of the damage until it was too late. I had to tell her that she cannot blame herself for not doing more or feel guilty, and I am sure you need to hear that as well. Some people are self destructive and no matter how much you try some battles are lost but we never stop trying. Don't be scared... you're carrying on the tradition and making a positive impact by remembering them and telling their story here. That's huge! 1 Quote
EmotionallyUnstable Posted January 6 Posted January 6 We all have our vices, some worse than others. For myself, I’m in a dry January stretch, actually after too much fun in the weeks leading up to Christmas. Definitely my battle, and a constant struggle in my own life. These stories are always good to hear. For many of us, moderation is a challenge. Something im still and likely always will be working on. Its part of my obsessive personality that I have with many facets of my life. Curious if anyone else on the board is in for dry January? 1 Quote
Simon Posted January 6 Posted January 6 14 minutes ago, EmotionallyUnstable said: Curious if anyone else on the board is in for dry January? I don't do it consciously, but it seems that every year after the holidays I tend to go anywhere from a few weeks to a few months without any alcohol. 3 Quote
Buffalo716 Posted January 6 Posted January 6 (edited) Alcohol is a huge problem for lots... I have had my fair share of problems Edited January 6 by Buffalo716 4 Quote
BuffaloBill Posted January 6 Posted January 6 4 hours ago, EasternOHBillsFan said: My sister, in the middle of a contentious divorce, received the terrible news that her childhood friend is dying of liver failure at 42. I knew him even though I was older through our church, and he is in hospice now. For many years, he has basically been drinking himself to death because of a secret he could not face as an employee of a Christian school and churchgoer, which is that he was homosexual. This isn't about religion or sexual orientation, but a human being who felt so terrible about this that he drank an insane amount of alcohol which led to liver failure at 42 years old. If you are a person that drinks to excess daily to ease your pain, you don't need to respond to this, just read... PEOPLE CARE ABOUT YOU AND YOU CAN REACH OUT WITH ZERO JUDGMENT. YOUR LIFE MEANS SOMETHING. LET PEOPLE HELP YOU BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE. Please... If you know someone who has drank to excess daily in the past and say they are good, follow up with them... don't take their words at face value. Check them out. You may just save a life. Thank you for your words and prayers for your sister and her friend. I gave up drinking nine or so years ago. Just saw too many people around me ending up with too many problems and I had my own due to frequent excessive drinking. I was lucky because I could and did make a simple choice to stop. I have no idea if I qualified as an addict and don’t care. Giving it up was the right thing to do and I do not miss it at all. 3 1 Quote
stuvian Posted January 6 Posted January 6 any of us can succumb to addiction or mental illness. Go forth in humility and protect your mental health 3 1 Quote
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