Dealing with losing a dog?

[Joe Ferguson forever]

PUPPIES....will change your life mostly for the better.  get some blue pads.

[BarleyNY]

14 hours ago, Simon said:

 

I'm 55 and have been a dog whisperer ever since I was a kid; I just get them for some reason.

Despite that I never actually owned one until the first time about 10 years ago when we got a Golden puppy and named her Stella.

Saturday night she unexpectedly died in my arms (burying her out at camp at midnight under a full moon on Halloween weekend was not a treat) after almost 10 years of being a constant companion, hiking partner, perfect friend, etc.

I've buried too many people over the years and have carried far more than my share of caskets but I can't recall a time when I've ever been this rattled about losing someone. Half the time I want to sit on the couch with a thousand yard stare and the other half I want to beat somebody senseless for looking at me sideways. I literally had to walk out of an auto parts store empty-handed today because I was afraid I was going to drag a guy over the counter for being too friendly.

How in the hell do y'all deal with this ****?

 

I’m so sorry. 

[Bermuda Triangle]

This sucks.  I'm sorry - it's a day that no pet owner wants to have to face, yet we all know it's inevitable.

[muppy]

Each person is different. I think  doing this, meaning sharing your grief and thoughts with others who 100% empathize at least tells you its normal to be rattled,  Mad, sad, all of that.

 

The shelters and animal rescues are all filled to the brim. And the overflow are euthanized. That too is heartbreaking.

 

You can find all sorts of pitties, shepherds and huskies especially in the shelters is what my GF just shared with me recently.

 

Whenever you are ready amigo. You are young enough to even get a puppy if you would want.

 

God Bless you

 

RIP Stella

 

You were LOVED.

[WhoTom]

Sorry for your loss, Man.

 

As others have suggested, allow yourself time to grieve and, when you're ready, go to a shelter and adopt a dog. We've gotten two dogs as puppies (one was a stray that someone found on the roadside, the other a "failed foster" from a shelter) and two as adults from a shelter. (A failed foster is when you start out fostering a dog and then become attached and adopt him/her.) There are pros and cons to both, but taking a dog out of a shelter and giving them a real home will give you a warm fuzzy feeling that will help to heal the pain of losing Stella.

 

Edited November 2, 2023 by WhoTom

[Joe Ferguson forever]

1 hour ago, muppy said:

Each person is different. I think  doing this, meaning sharing your grief and thoughts with others who 100% empathize at least tells you its normal to be rattled,  Mad, sad, all of that.

 

The shelters and animal rescues are all filled to the brim. And the overflow are euthanized. That too is heartbreaking.

 

You can find all sorts of pitties, shepherds and huskies especially in the shelters is what my GF just shared with me recently.

 

Whenever you are ready amigo. You are young enough to even get a puppy if you would want.

 

God Bless you

 

RIP Stella

 

You were LOVED.

better to have loved and lost than not to love at all...

[CountDorkula]

I’m terrified of this. 
I rescued two pits who I’ve had since 2015. 
 

the dogs have been through hell and back with me divorce, death, job loss, moving across country. 
 

I can see they are getting older(9 and 10)  and slowing down 

 

I can’t imagine a day where I don’t pull in the driveway and I see the two heads poke out the window curtain and they do their happy dances and I come in the house.

 

 

add - sorry for your loss. It’s the hardest thing to do from all accounts. Grieve your way as much as you want. Don’t let others tell you when and how! 
 

as other have echoed dogs ask for very little (unless they are treat driven like mine). It’s why I think it’s the hardest thing to do. 

 

 

Edited November 2, 2023 by CountDorkula

[Augie]

5 hours ago, CountDorkula said:

I’m terrified of this. 
I rescued two pits who I’ve had since 2015. 
 

the dogs have been through hell and back with me divorce, death, job loss, moving across country. 
 

I can see they are getting older(9 and 10)  and slowing down 

 

I can’t imagine a day where I don’t pull in the driveway and I see the two heads poke out the window curtain and they do their happy dances and I come in the house.

 

 

add - sorry for your loss. It’s the hardest thing to do from all accounts. Grieve your way as much as you want. Don’t let others tell you when and how! 
 

as other have echoed dogs ask for very little (unless they are treat driven like mine). It’s why I think it’s the hardest thing to do. 

 

 

 

When they are gone, even just to the groomer, there is almost a palpable difference in how the house feels. Some kind of energy is missing.  When they are gone and not coming back, that loss takes on a greater intensity for a while. It is so empty and quiet.

 

I know people who never got another dog because it was so hard to face the loss. We take the opposite approach and look forward to adding a new member to the family after some proper time. We usually have had two at a time, and they are truly best friends. 

 

I won’t suggest what is best for anyone else. That is far too personal. But I will say that time helps quite a bit. It’s a bit too slow and gradual, but it happens. 

 

Like so many things in life, make a point of enjoying what we have in the here and now. I just took our girls into the newly upgraded backyard, where they proceeded to do their best to trash everything planted over the last two days by a large crew. The puppy can’t be trusted, but even the 3 year old gave me the finger, I think! They were running thru all these cool new plants like a drag race thru a long car wash! What a great new game! They probably couldn’t hear me yelling to stop for the sound of all the snapping plants going off in their ears.

 

Hey! It ain’t ALL perfect!   😂 

 

[DrDawkinstein]

21 hours ago, Simon said:

 

I'm 55 and have been a dog whisperer ever since I was a kid; I just get them for some reason.

Despite that I never actually owned one until the first time about 10 years ago when we got a Golden puppy and named her Stella.

Saturday night she unexpectedly died in my arms (burying her out at camp at midnight under a full moon on Halloween weekend was not a treat) after almost 10 years of being a constant companion, hiking partner, perfect friend, etc.

I've buried too many people over the years and have carried far more than my share of caskets but I can't recall a time when I've ever been this rattled about losing someone. Half the time I want to sit on the couch with a thousand yard stare and the other half I want to beat somebody senseless for looking at me sideways. I literally had to walk out of an auto parts store empty-handed today because I was afraid I was going to drag a guy over the counter just for trying to be too friendly.

How in the hell do y'all deal with this ****?

 

 

Sorry to hear, my man. It's definitely not easy. As others have said, it just takes time. Which also kinda stinks because after a few weeks, I caught myself feeling a little better or at least not thinking about it constantly, and thought to myself "well, at least I'm starting to get over it and feel better", but then immediately thought "wait, I dont WANT to feel better about it, I want my freaking dog back!". And then put myself right back in to the funk. Which was fine because I needed more time.

 

So dont feel bad about feeling bad about it.

 

Dogs arent here for a long time, theyre here for a good time. So remember the good times. Know that you gave her a great life, and she was totally grateful. And now she can rest easy, like dogs love to do.

[UConn James]

We’re taking my little boy to the Rainbow Bridge this evening. Tuft’s vet ER last night said based on history, examinations that it is highly likely a brain tumor and it’s reached end stage. I’ve been a wreck.

 

This is a pre-publishing version of my write-up post to FB to announce it, tho I have told several close friends and fam:

 

Our house has lost its joyful heart and wagging tail.

 

This evening, a day and two months shy of 14 years old, Ruff Ruffman passed over the Rainbow Bridge to meet Sara, Mack, Sammy, his girlfriend from across the street, Elsie, and into the waiting arms of his Nana who was always generous with love, treats & cookies.

 

We tried a few different Rx medications as ‘throwing the gun’ in movie parlance and a trip to Tuft’s yesterday evening where they said because of the progression abdominal their examination, it’s most likely a brain tumor. He has had a rapid decline in neurological condition since my post last month and it has been painful to watch as his body betrayed him…. It’s as if the neuro symptoms stole Ruff’s black & white fur coat and were wobbling, stumbling, and falling around, pretending to be him, belied by that unique Ruff spark missing from his eyes & spirit. 

 

This is the decision every dog parent never wants to have to make. You worry that you’ve made the wrong choice for your best friend but you simultaneously know it was the right choice to give them dignity, peace, and relief. It is downright cruel how short their lifespan is compared to ours; if there is a God, he has a lot of explaining to do. This is going to wreck me, just as losing our previous pups did.

 

I was so lucky to have this little boy brought to me in spring 2010 two years after losing my grandfather and Sammy in the same week. I didn’t want another for two years after and those were the saddest and emptiest two years of my life. Speaking as someone who is autistic… the companionship that comes with having a pet is hard to overstate in its importance of social value, connection with another being in a deeper & more trusted way than with other humans, comfort, and keeping me in a routine / getting me up and going through a day.

 

German shorthaired pointers are a unique breed, high-strung, always need to be 1/4 mile ahead working in the field or by pulling on a leash (I tried ‘bout everything to keep him from near pulling arms out of sockets), always on the lookout for birds and posing with raised front paw and straight tail when they see anything with a heartbeat. The inquisitive head tilts, the 50-a-day full-body shake-outs, the endless running around the yard. Ruff had a rough start at 1 year of age when we were attacked and bitten by two dogs while we were walking home on a neighborhood dirt road. He was never really good / at ease with many dogs afterward and missed out on the joy of that kind of play. Losing him means another link to my mum is now gone — how he lay with her after treatments and on her last night and let out an uncharacteristic howl immediately after she passed as if he knew or saw something at another plane than we experience. We have dearly missed our ice cream walks to the corner store with my niece Madeline, who was always his favorite person and with whom he was so gentle; when going to Jerry’s house, he would always first race to her room hoping she would be there, instead of ripped away by 8 years of stall tactics by lawyers, family courts, and alienation. I will miss so many little things. I will miss making an extra egg in the morning to feed him at the table. I will miss cuddling with him on the sofa and bed; he was a first rate snuggler and on cold nights was a portable cordless heater. He was so loved and was so loving. I was so lucky to have him with me. Uncle Duff gave us a small ceramic plate that still hangs over the fireplace that reads, “Heaven is where you meet all the dogs you ever loved.” I hope so and I hope Ruff is first in that line. My beautiful boy. And not just a good boy — the best boy there is.

 

 

[teef]

this thread is killing me.  i have an 18 year old cat and a 13 year old yellow lab.  everyday they seem to get older, and boy is that tough.  my dog doesn't even realize when i come home, so no more running up to me to give me kisses.  they're still happy and loved, but i know what's coming very soon.  i'm maximizing my time with them now, just bought them both new beds, and an trying to soak it all in before it's too late.  i have paintings of both of my buddies hanging in my home office, so they'll always be remembered, but i had to close my office door after reading this thread.

[Augie]

1 hour ago, UConn James said:

We’re taking my little boy to the Rainbow Bridge this evening. Tuft’s vet ER last night said based on history, examinations that it is highly likely a brain tumor and it’s reached end stage. I’ve been a wreck.

 

This is a pre-publishing version of my write-up post to FB to announce it, tho I have told several close friends and fam:

 

Our house has lost its joyful heart and wagging tail.

 

This evening, a day and two months shy of 14 years old, Ruff Ruffman passed over the Rainbow Bridge to meet Sara, Mack, Sammy, his girlfriend from across the street, Elsie, and into the waiting arms of his Nana who was always generous with love, treats & cookies.

 

We tried a few different Rx medications as ‘throwing the gun’ in movie parlance and a trip to Tuft’s yesterday evening where they said because of the progression abdominal their examination, it’s most likely a brain tumor. He has had a rapid decline in neurological condition since my post last month and it has been painful to watch as his body betrayed him…. It’s as if the neuro symptoms stole Ruff’s black & white fur coat and were wobbling, stumbling, and falling around, pretending to be him, belied by that unique Ruff spark missing from his eyes & spirit. 

 

This is the decision every dog parent never wants to have to make. You worry that you’ve made the wrong choice for your best friend but you simultaneously know it was the right choice to give them dignity, peace, and relief. It is downright cruel how short their lifespan is compared to ours; if there is a God, he has a lot of explaining to do. This is going to wreck me, just as losing our previous pups did.

 

I was so lucky to have this little boy brought to me in spring 2010 two years after losing my grandfather and Sammy in the same week. I didn’t want another for two years after and those were the saddest and emptiest two years of my life. Speaking as someone who is autistic… the companionship that comes with having a pet is hard to overstate in its importance of social value, connection with another being in a deeper & more trusted way than with other humans, comfort, and keeping me in a routine / getting me up and going through a day.

 

German shorthaired pointers are a unique breed, high-strung, always need to be 1/4 mile ahead working in the field or by pulling on a leash (I tried ‘bout everything to keep him from near pulling arms out of sockets), always on the lookout for birds and posing with raised front paw and straight tail when they see anything with a heartbeat. The inquisitive head tilts, the 50-a-day full-body shake-outs, the endless running around the yard. Ruff had a rough start at 1 year of age when we were attacked and bitten by two dogs while we were walking home on a neighborhood dirt road. He was never really good / at ease with many dogs afterward and missed out on the joy of that kind of play. Losing him means another link to my mum is now gone — how he lay with her after treatments and on her last night and let out an uncharacteristic howl immediately after she passed as if he knew or saw something at another plane than we experience. We have dearly missed our ice cream walks to the corner store with my niece Madeline, who was always his favorite person and with whom he was so gentle; when going to Jerry’s house, he would always first race to her room hoping she would be there, instead of ripped away by 8 years of stall tactics by lawyers, family courts, and alienation. I will miss so many little things. I will miss making an extra egg in the morning to feed him at the table. I will miss cuddling with him on the sofa and bed; he was a first rate snuggler and on cold nights was a portable cordless heater. He was so loved and was so loving. I was so lucky to have him with me. Uncle Duff gave us a small ceramic plate that still hangs over the fireplace that reads, “Heaven is where you meet all the dogs you ever loved.” I hope so and I hope Ruff is first in that line. My beautiful boy. And not just a good boy — the best boy there is.

 

 

 

That is one beautiful dog, and he had a great long run with you. Enjoy the wonderful memories. 

 

My first two dogs as a little kid were German shorthair pointers. It was too much energy for my family, but heaven is full of places for dogs to run full out to their hearts content. 

[May Day 10]

Its tough.  

 

With me, we had another dog and her companionship filled the void a bit and was a lifesaver.  

 

It also helped to think about the good times and funny stuff.  

[WhoTom]

1 hour ago, UConn James said:

We’re taking my little boy to the Rainbow Bridge this evening.

 

Sorry for the loss of Ruff. Sounds like you were both lucky to have each other.

 

[Mike in Horseheads]

On 11/1/2023 at 6:43 PM, Simon said:

 

I'm 55 and have been a dog whisperer ever since I was a kid; I just get them for some reason.

Despite that I never actually owned one until the first time about 10 years ago when we got a Golden puppy and named her Stella.

Saturday night she unexpectedly died in my arms (burying her out at camp at midnight under a full moon on Halloween weekend was not a treat) after almost 10 years of being a constant companion, hiking partner, perfect friend, etc.

I've buried too many people over the years and have carried far more than my share of caskets but I can't recall a time when I've ever been this rattled about losing someone. Half the time I want to sit on the couch with a thousand yard stare and the other half I want to beat somebody senseless for looking at me sideways. I literally had to walk out of an auto parts store empty-handed today because I was afraid I was going to drag a guy over the counter just for trying to be too friendly.

How in the hell do y'all deal with this ****?

 

I had two Dacshunds that lived to almost 15 and was heart broken over both dieing.  I haven't got a new dog since Buster the last one died, just can't deal with it again. My condolences on your loss