Loss of a pet

[Goin Breakdown]

Maybe this is silly idk. I can't sleep and I don't have anyone really to talk to especially at this time of night. I don't do this kind of crap but I'm honestly feeling lost at the moment over my cat that passed today. I'm the kind of person that when anything gets lost around the house, something goes off in my head and I have to find it. I feel that way right now and I'll never get my dude back. Anyway I'm kinda just hoping that writing this helps. Thanks. 

[Buffalo716]

It always stings man

 

Prayers 

[Goin Breakdown]

18 minutes ago, Buffalo716 said:

It always stings man

 

Prayers 

I appreciate that

[Buffalo716]

1 minute ago, Goin Breakdown said:

I appreciate that

I’ve lost 2 dogs and 4 cats over the years 

 

my third dog is turning 8 and she’s amazing 

 

cherish every day and memory

[Beck Water]

1 hour ago, Goin Breakdown said:

Maybe this is silly idk. I can't sleep and I don't have anyone really to talk to especially at this time of night. I don't do this kind of crap but I'm honestly feeling lost at the moment over my cat that passed today. I'm the kind of person that when anything gets lost around the house, something goes off in my head and I have to find it. I feel that way right now and I'll never get my dude back. Anyway I'm kinda just hoping that writing this helps. Thanks. 

 

There's an ebook someone pointed me towards years ago when I lost a dog to cancer.  The author has edited it over the years, but in the original version he quotes someone who explains "for many people, the death of a pet can be harder than the death of a family member.  this is because many of us have complex and ambiguous relationships with our families, but straightforward and loving relationships with our pets"

 

Sorry about your loss

Edited May 16, 2023 by Beck Water

[Bad Things]

Sorry to hear about your loss, mate.

Kia Kaha.

 

 

[Augie]

3 hours ago, Goin Breakdown said:

Maybe this is silly idk. I can't sleep and I don't have anyone really to talk to especially at this time of night. I don't do this kind of crap but I'm honestly feeling lost at the moment over my cat that passed today. I'm the kind of person that when anything gets lost around the house, something goes off in my head and I have to find it. I feel that way right now and I'll never get my dude back. Anyway I'm kinda just hoping that writing this helps. Thanks. 

 

I get it, and I’m sorry for your loss. We had to put down my 13.5 year old Golden Gracie recently. She was the 6th Golden we have lost.  It is devastating, including for the now lonely pup we got to be her best friend. We are eagerly awaiting a litter coming in June. We can never truly replace Gracie, but we can get a new pal for our Scout. 

 

.

2 hours ago, Beck Water said:

 

There's an ebook someone pointed me towards years ago when I lost a dog to cancer.  The author has edited it over the years, but in the original version he quotes someone who explains "for many people, the death of a pet can be harder than the death of a family member.  this is because many of us have complex and ambiguous relationships with our families, but straightforward and loving relationships with our pets"

 

Sorry about your loss

 

This is true, and beautiful. 

 

EDIT: We’ve are traveling right now and last night we had dinner at a great restaurant in Paris, where many people had brought their dogs. We have some places that allow dogs on the patio, but this was inside the restaurant. I loved it! There was a super cute little dog heading out, and I offered her owner a little dog treat I had found in my coat pocket. You’d have thought I paid for her dinner. Her reaction said everything you need to know about how much she loves that little pup. Pets can enhance your life immeasurably. 

 

Sorry again for your loss. 

 

 

.

Edited May 16, 2023 by Augie

[Gregg]

Sorry for your loss.

[qwksilver]

Try to remember the funny things your cat did that made him special. Keep those memories. Know that you gave him a great life. Try to find some peace. When you are ready, and everyone's timeline is different, you'll adopt again. Pets add so much to our lives, the pain you are going through makes it so worthwhile.

 

Peace.

 

 

[The Jokeman]

8 hours ago, Goin Breakdown said:

Maybe this is silly idk. I can't sleep and I don't have anyone really to talk to especially at this time of night. I don't do this kind of crap but I'm honestly feeling lost at the moment over my cat that passed today. I'm the kind of person that when anything gets lost around the house, something goes off in my head and I have to find it. I feel that way right now and I'll never get my dude back. Anyway I'm kinda just hoping that writing this helps. Thanks. 

Losing a family member whether they have two or four legs is never easy man. Just remember them in your thoughts and words and they can live forever in your heart. 

[Royale with Cheese]

I've lost 2 in my life as an adult and it was devastating both times.  

 

My last one back in 2018, I was actually giving her chest compressions because she stopped breathing...she had a heart attack.

 

I have two more now that are about 5 and 2 and I hate that I am already thinking about that day. 

 

It hurts because you cared.  Your pet is only a small fraction of your life in terms on length but keep in mind you were his/her WHOLE life and that life was wonderful for them because of you.

8 hours ago, Beck Water said:

 

There's an ebook someone pointed me towards years ago when I lost a dog to cancer.  The author has edited it over the years, but in the original version he quotes someone who explains "for many people, the death of a pet can be harder than the death of a family member.  this is because many of us have complex and ambiguous relationships with our families, but straightforward and loving relationships with our pets"

 

Sorry about your loss

 

100%.

 

It was so much harder on me when my dog died than my grandmas.  It wasn't that I had a bad relationship with my grandmother, she was great.  We never really connected because she didn't speak english so we never communicated.  It was head nodding and calling my mom to translate anything important.  
I was just sort of around.

 

I was so much more emotionally connected with my dog.

[Logic]

“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.”

― Jamie Anderson


I've always liked that quote, except...I'm not sure I agree that the love has no place to go. I think you still feel it deeply, still beam it out into the cosmos in the direction of your departed loved one, and -- if you're like me -- have a little bit of faith that they're receiving that love in some way. 

Your relationship with your pet in their physical form is over, but your relationship with what your pet really is has not ended, it's just changed in nature. You can go into that heart space any time, the place where the good memories and the deep love abide, and be with your loved one. They'll always be there.

I hope you find strength and healing in your difficult time.

[Goin Breakdown]

Thank you all. I appreciate the perspective and kind words. It Mean a lot to me. 

[muppy]

Quote

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, your pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water, and sunshine, and friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who have been ill and old are restored to health and strength, those who were hurt are made better and strong again, like we remember them before they go to heaven. They are happseonter suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are shining, his body shakes. Suddenly he begins to run from the herd, rushing over the grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cuddle in a happy hug never to be apart again. You and your pet are in tears. Your hands again cuddle his head and you look again into his trusting eyes, so long gone from life, but never absent from your heart, and then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together.

 a fellow pet lover wrote a poem called he Rainbow Bridge. It has comforted millions of people. As I'm writing this my foster dog Tilly is next to me giving me a tongue bath like saying Yes Momma Yes.  It hurts so badly when we lose our furry family members. you can look at rainbowbridge.com for grief resources and support to help you through your grief. Please know that all pet owners feel and understand your pain.

 

Im very sorry for your loss. 

Edited May 16, 2023 by muppy

[gonzo1105]

I think it stings more to me when they are lost quickly or unexpectedly. I had two Husky brothers, Oreo and Zorro, from the same litter and we raised them both since they were puppies. 

 

Oreo was 12 years old when he passed. Up until a month before he was energetic, his normal self and loving life. The next month he had dropped significant weight, jaundice started and he had liver cancer. Due to his age we had him pass to stop any future suffering. My wife and I balled our eyes out for days due to the unexpected nature of it because we had seen him as his normal self until it happened. 

 

Zorro was almost 15 when he passed this past October. He was a shell of his former self. He had lost a ton of muscle mass, slept all day, and started to lose his bodily functions while struggling to walk. While I was sad to see him go for sure, it was his time and probably beyond his time with us. I was more empathetic for him and knew I was doing the right thing for him. I miss him but the situations were vastly different and the emotional side of things were handled very different. 

[teef]

I always find these post so difficult.  we've all been there and know how hard it is.

 

i'm on the cusp of this now.  i have a 17 year old black cat, and a 12 year old yellow lab.  my cat while old is still fairly feisty.  i can feel his spine when i pet him, but he still runs around a bit and likes to play.  my dog is really starting to show signs of age.  his face is old, he has a number of sebaceous gland and fatty tumors, but they don't seem to bother him.  even my mother in law stated that he always looked, "tired" recently. 

 

when their time comes, i think it will be the routine that will hit me the most.  i wake up at 5:30 during the weekdays just so i can spend the first half hour of my day with them.  feed them, let them out, play some ball to move around.  same with the evening.  my cat will sit with me when i do paperwork, and my dog is in his bed in my office.  we always start the day and end the day together...for the last 12 plus years.  

 

i think about them not being here more and more lately, but i've taken the attitude that a lot of other posters have....animals have a short life.  it's our responsibility to show them love, fun, and to take great care of them during this time.  i can honestly say i've done this for my friends, and will do this every day further that they're here.  it will hurt when they're gone, but i know i'll have done the right thing.

 

to remember them, i already had paintings made of both that hang in my home office right above their bed.  i'll have them forever to remember in their best points of life.

[DrDawkinstein]

Sorry for your loss, OP (and everyone else who is sharing in here). Never easy. Hang in there.

[PromoTheRobot]

12 hours ago, Goin Breakdown said:

Maybe this is silly idk. I can't sleep and I don't have anyone really to talk to especially at this time of night. I don't do this kind of crap but I'm honestly feeling lost at the moment over my cat that passed today. I'm the kind of person that when anything gets lost around the house, something goes off in my head and I have to find it. I feel that way right now and I'll never get my dude back. Anyway I'm kinda just hoping that writing this helps. Thanks. 

 

I've had to put down a pet 4 times. The hardest was one dog who was healthy but became a psycho; sweet and loveable one minute, a snarling beast the next. We couldn't risk him biting someone so we did him in. I found that really hard because the damn dog trusted me and I took him to his death. The others were all really sick and it was the right thing to do.

[Dr. Who]

Below is a quote from Father Martin D'Arcy in his book, Death and Life. I personally believe it.

 

"God, who has done so much greater, turned sin and death into a triumph and restored the dead to life, will not withhold what is less, namely, to restore the experiences which made us what we are and bound friends to us by affection and vow.  Nor will those experiences be just memories . . Our pets, our animal friends, I fervently believe, will be there when we awake in that undiscovered country.  If they can touch us so profoundly with a love that is so pure, so innocent, I know they'll survive death and share with us in God's eternal love."

Edited May 16, 2023 by Dr. Who

[aristocrat]

Sorry man that’s tough. We lost our puggle in December. She was 14 and it was tough.  Funny thing was I was ok the first couple months maybe cause we put her down as she was in pain. Then out of nowhere I was missing the hell out of her. Just all these little things reminding me.  My pit is coming up on 12 or so and he’s still doing good but it will kill me when he goes. He’s been with me through so much.