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The Patriots Play That Will Live in Infamy Needs A Name


wjag

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11 hours ago, NUT said:

Fail Marry

Pretty sure that title goes to Nathan Peterman, who we’ll see in the sidelines vs. the Bears this weekend.

 

Ironically, it was in 2018 AGAINST the bears where (if you don’t recall) he ended up TRYING TO SCRAMBLE IN A HAIL MARRY FROM THE 50 YARD LINE.

 

Hilarious. We lost that game 41-9 and haven’t played them since. 

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3 minutes ago, EmotionallyUnstable said:

Pretty sure that title goes to Nathan Peterman, who we’ll see in the sidelines vs. the Bears this weekend.

 

Ironically, it was in 2018 AGAINST the bears where (if you don’t recall) he ended up TRYING TO SCRAMBLE IN A HAIL MARRY FROM THE 50 YARD LINE.

 

Hilarious. We lost that game 41-9 and haven’t played them since. 

 

The Fail Mary was Seahawks and Packers with scab refs

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXGFZkIEMK0&ab_channel=NFL

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Thank God for karma. Back in the day when BB was still considered The Greatest Coach of All Time he got his team to the Super Bowl against Seattle in 2015. In the waning moments of the game the Seahawks, who had displayed a rugged ground game that day led by Marshawn Lynch (who was showing why his nickname was Beast Mode) were in perfect position to close the contest out with a touchdown. They had marched down the field with the innate inevitability and confidence of scoring the winning touchdown. The whole world could see it coming and astute observers like yours truly wondered why the Patriots* coach wasn't using his timeouts in order to give his team a chance, albeit slim, to come back and score. No, Billy was either perfectly happy to let the Seahawks win the game or had misread the clock and thought it was still the 3rd quarter. Anyway, the Seahawks had a first down with a yard to go and a couple of timeouts to give them 3 opportunities to breach the goal line with a back that hadn't been stopped all day. Pete Carroll let Belichick off the hook and the Seahawks threw a pass into the end zone that got intercepted and ended the game. It was another Super Bowl victory for The Grumpy One that helped cement his genius status and establish him as the greatest coach of all time.

 

Sometimes in life it takes a good deal of time for the story behind the story to come to life. Back at the turn of the century Bill Belichick had just recently been named head coach of the Patriots and had experienced a successful career as a defensive coordinator for various teams. Bill was worried that after his losing Cleveland HC experience he didn't have what it takes to be a head coach. After a relaxing night full of Sam Adams Winter Lager and a stimulating conversation about interior offensive line techniques and the different nuances of QB pre-snap cadence with his dog Taylor, he had a vision that turned his career around. Bill had an eerie visit from an apparition that looked just like that Al Pacino guy on the vcr tape he had recently rented from Blockbuster. It took him a minute but after looking at his late notice he deduced that the movie was named "The Devil's Advocate" and had that seductive little hussy in it played by Charlize Theron. The creepy looking guy that looked more like a gangster said to just call him Michael and made it a point to get down to business. "This is the deal" said Mike in a voice that could only be described as a cross between a raspy utterance and a whisper. "You want to be a successful head coach and I'm behind two of my assistants in buying souls. I'll make you an offer that you can't refuse. Sell me your soul and by the time you retire you'll be widely hailed as the GOAT". Bill, sensing that this was a watershed moment in his life hesitated and asked if he could have a little time to think it over. Mike, smiling like a benevolent father agreed to give him a week to return the contract. 

 

Five days after the meeting with the mysterious Mike, Head Coach Bill Belichick strolled the sidelines of a football game between his team and the New York Jets. During that game star quarterback Drew Bledsoe was seriously injured and some no name 6th round QB from the University of Michigan had to come into the game. After the game Bill deduced that his career was in doubt without sealing the deal with "Mike" and he rushed over to deliver the contract before Mike changed his mind. After shaking hands, Bill lamented the fact that he had just lost his starting QB and that was the catalyst for him agreeing to the deal. Mike, sporting his benevolent fatherly smile again chuckled and said "welcome to my world, nothing happens here by chance. I think your new QB will be a pleasant surprise." Over the next 20 years coach Belichick enjoyed widespread acclaim for his numerous Division Championships, playoff wins and Lombardi Trophies. Along with praise for his on field success his involvement with numerous cheating scandals was basically discounted by the press and his curt and rude comments were categorized as "cute" idiosyncrasies by the genius.

 

Flash forward 20+ years and Bill Belichick was once again sucking down Sam Adams Winter Lager and talking with his dog Taylor, who didn't seem to have aged a day since Bill's time with the Giants. Bill commented about the play of his linebackers in the recent beatdown by those "&#%$ing upstarts in Buffalo who have the audacity to think that they deserve to win my division. My guys are failing me", harrumphed Grumpy. "They let that farmboy from some hicktown in California who couldn't get a chance anywhere but at some college called Wyoming beat them all over the field".  Taylor, affectionately called "LT" by those in the know, responded with a whisperlike bark that sounded somewhat raspy. "I'm considered Man's Best Friend but I'm going to give it to you straight. For over 20 years I've been here by your side, making it possible for you to become the GOAT. Throughout those decades you gave me no respect and instead of showing confidence in my ability to help you, you chose to cheat your way to the top. You fed me that cheap dogfood from Dollar General and even kicked me after last year's playoff loss to the Bills. I stuck by you through thick and thin. I even caused the weather in last year's regular season game to give you guys a chance in Buffalo. All bets are off you fat bastard. The contract is cancelled." "You can't do that" cried Bill. "You promised that I'd be the GOAT." "Well, let's see", LT said with what sounded like a little snarl. "When is your next game?" "We play the Raiders this Sunday" said Bill looking smug again knowing that LT was giving in because of his stature. "All right Bill, no commitments for any future games, but I promise you that Sunday's game will solidify you as the GOAT". 

 

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