Kim Pegula Progressing Well

[YoloinOhio]

Jessie advanced  this morning to the next round at Wimbledon fwiw 

[Mr. WEO]

2 hours ago, Greg S said:

 

Probably to get it out there before any rumors or crazy speculation came out. In today's internet world the news would have come out one way or another. Being  co-owner of the Bills-Sabres makes her a "celebrity" type of person who is recognized by the general public.

 

 

It could only have the opposite result....

[leh-nerd skin-erd]

59 minutes ago, Irv said:

 

I had a-fib in January.  Heart rate was 170.  Normal is 60-100.  Felt like my heart was vibrating.  On blood thiners and a couple of other drugs to avoid stroke.  

What a mess! 
 

(Hope you’re on the right track now Irv!)

[MattM]

27 minutes ago, YoloinOhio said:

Jessie advanced  this morning to the next round at Wimbledon fwiw 

Very glad to see this, too.
 

Not to sound too "tin foil hatty," but with gambling allowed on Wimbledon matches, were I king I would check into whether any large wagers were made against Jessie for that match and see if there's any connection between any such wagers and those who started the rumors. The rumor just seemed a bit too oddly timed and weirdly specific to be totally random....

[4merper4mer]

42 minutes ago, Shaw66 said:

Well, just for conversation's sake, I'll disagree.  

 

Like pretty much all of us, I'm tremendously worried for Kim.   For Bills fans, the Bills are family, and Kim's the momma.  I'm not saying that's right or wrong or whatever, but that's the way it is.  We care about her like she's our family.  It's irrational, I know, but we do. 

 

Beyond that, she's a public figure.  She operates in a world where her actions and behaviors are reported and publicly known.  I'm not saying that's right or wrong, either, but that's the way it is.  Public figures simply cannot have the same expectations of privacy that everyone else has, and they have to work very hard to keep their private lives from becoming public.   Lots of people want to be famous, and one of the common complaints of people who have become famous is the loss of privacy.  

 

In that environment, I thought it was odd that the family would put out an announcement that Kim was being treated, ask for privacy, and then say nothing for however long it was.  Obviously, the family can choose to do whatever it wants - either be public about the fact that she's ill and seek to keep that information confidential.  But once they've decided they're going to make it public, it doesn't work very well then to say nothing.   That doesn't mean that once they've gone public they have to give hourly or daily updates, but I think it does mean that once they've gone public without giving details, they at least have to say something every few days, even if what they say continues to give no details.  When I say "they have to say," I don't mean there's any legal requirement; I just mean that for public figures, it's an unfair thing to do to the hundreds of thousands of people who have been made anxious and concerned by the first announcement.   

 

Look at Bruce Willis.  In March, his family announced that he had aphasia and is retired.   In that situation, they gave enough information for most reasonable people to understand that he has a serious problem, we know what it is, and we can read about it and make our own conclusions about his future.  We understand that it's time to back off and leave the guy alone.   In Kim's case, they haven't done any of that yet, which leaves the public hanging and worrying, and as evidenced by this thread, speculating.   That doesn't mean that the Pegulas have to give details; it just means that if they're not going to give details, they need to say something every few days or week to help us deal with our anxiety.   I'm just saying I think they waited too long to make the second announcement.  

 

Particularly because Kim feels like family.  Imagine that your father called and said your mother was in the ICU but she wants you to respect her privacy, so he's not giving you any more information.    Imagine he doesn't tell you any more for two weeks.   Sure, I get that Kim's NOT my mother, but that doesn't change the fact she feels like my mother, or my wife, or my daughter (ah, the fantasies!).  Whether she likes it or not, her position as a public figure has created those feelings.  It would be different of course, if she was a traditional 19th century wife, outside the public eye - nobody ever paid a lot of attention to Mrs. Wilson all those years, because it was clear that Ralph was the owner and she was just his wife.   But Kim took on a much different role, and once she does that, she occupies space in the minds of Bills fans that causes us to become upset when they announce she's been hospitalized.  

 

I'm thrilled she's improving, and so long as I know that, I don't need to know the details.   However, if I were their public relations guy, I would tell them not to wait so long to make another statement.  

 

 

Dude if you feel like Kim is your mother do you think that is on you or on her?   Caring about her is not irrational IMO but expecting or thinking that they owe anyone periodic updates IMO is misguided.  It is not near as bad as going on a message board and saying “she had a stroke” or whatever other guess popped into someone’s head.  The stuff supposedly out on Twitter then here that “was speculation but had legs” took it to the worst possible level.
 

And saying that updates would minimize this is baloney except in certain circumstances.  Bruce Willis is likely gone from the public eye forever and has something from which he won’t recover.  It makes sense that no one is bugging them….the complete picture has already been painted.  It seems clear that Kim’s picture is still a work in progress thus nothing they say will satisfy their “children” for very long.   It also seems to me that meetings with her public relations team might be a low priority at the moment.
 

If Kim Pegula really was like a mother to everyone here her best bet would be to tell everyone to grow up.  But she’s not so she can’t.  

 

 

37 minutes ago, Mr. WEO said:

 

 

It could only have the opposite result....

Not really.  It may have expedited rumors a bit, I’ll agree with that, but after not having been seen in public for “x” amount of time, including possibly at Jessie’s high profile tennis matches, do you really think rumors would have never materialized?  

[Shaw66]

17 minutes ago, 4merper4mer said:

Dude if you feel like Kim is your mother do you think that is on you or on her?   Caring about her is not irrational IMO but expecting or thinking that they owe anyone periodic updates IMO is misguided.  It is not near as bad as going on a message board and saying “she had a stroke” or whatever other guess popped into someone’s head.  The stuff supposedly out on Twitter then here that “was speculation but had legs” took it to the worst possible level.
 

And saying that updates would minimize this is baloney except in certain circumstances.  Bruce Willis is likely gone from the public eye forever and has something from which he won’t recover.  It makes sense that no one is bugging them….the complete picture has already been painted.  It seems clear that Kim’s picture is still a work in progress thus nothing they say will satisfy their “children” for very long.   It also seems to me that meetings with her public relations team might be a low priority at the moment.
 

If Kim Pegula really was like a mother to everyone here her best bet would be to tell everyone to grow up.  But she’s not so she can’t.  

 

 

 

I knew I'd get this response, and I don't disagree that it SHOULD be the way you say.  It SHOULD be.  

 

But the world isn't the way it SHOULD be, the world is the way the world is, and in this world it's simply unreasonable to expect that hundreds of thousands of people are going to behave the way they should.   What I said is that given the way the world actually is, given that they are public figures in a modern, media-driven world, they would be better advised to give more frequent updates, even if those updates are only one line and ask again for privacy.  By doing that, by doing a simple little thing, they give some comfort to thousands of people. 

 

Bottom line for me is pretty much what I expect you'd say.   It's up to them to do what feels right to them, and it's up to me to manage my own emotions.  All I'm saying is that there are a lot of people who don't manage their emotions that well, and hearing something every few days or even a week is enough to help them. Not everyone - there always will be people clamoring for more, but for a lot people, they just need occasional assurance that things are not off the rails. 

[Gugny]

All this "family" talk is kinda creepy.

[Buffalo_Stampede]

6 minutes ago, Gugny said:

All this "family" talk is kinda creepy.

As in the Bills are family? They’re a part of my life.

 

 I got a notification with Former Bills head coach Marv Levy beginning the headline. My heart skipped a beat or two but it was for his CFL Hall of fame induction. I’m probably not the only one.

[Rocky Landing]

23 minutes ago, Gugny said:

All this "family" talk is kinda creepy.

No, it's just semantics.

[4merper4mer]

1 hour ago, Shaw66 said:

I knew I'd get this response, and I don't disagree that it SHOULD be the way you say.  It SHOULD be.  

 

But the world isn't the way it SHOULD be, the world is the way the world is, and in this world it's simply unreasonable to expect that hundreds of thousands of people are going to behave the way they should.   What I said is that given the way the world actually is, given that they are public figures in a modern, media-driven world, they would be better advised to give more frequent updates, even if those updates are only one line and ask again for privacy.  By doing that, by doing a simple little thing, they give some comfort to thousands of people. 

 

Bottom line for me is pretty much what I expect you'd say.   It's up to them to do what feels right to them, and it's up to me to manage my own emotions.  All I'm saying is that there are a lot of people who don't manage their emotions that well, and hearing something every few days or even a week is enough to help them. Not everyone - there always will be people clamoring for more, but for a lot people, they just need occasional assurance that things are not off the rails. 

I don’t think you’re way off in your analysis of society at large but if the Pegulas or anyone else behave the way one “should”  rather than the way to which the world has evolved isn’t that a good thing?  Can’t it be seen as leading by the example of prioritizing real interpersonal relationships over Facebook or whatever else is out there?  The world will never be what it should be until people do what they should do.  As you say, we can’t expect hundreds of thousands of people to behave the way they should.  Agreed.  But that doesn’t mean they should be enabled in that poor behavior like the kid at the bank screaming for a lollipop and mom giving in to shut them up.  Guess what?  When the next part of the errand route is the grocery store the screams for Lucky Charms will only get louder.

 

I also get that the task of updating people has become very simple over the last few decades.  At least technologically simple.  For some people writing stuff like that is emotionally difficult.  A lot of us can probably find out what our 7th grade lab partner had for dinner last Thursday if we really want to find that out.  That person can let us know very easily.  There normally isn’t enough clamor for that to ensure that the lab partner posts regular dietary updates.  At what point is the line crossed where that person should be compelled to upload pictures of their seafood medley?  
 

What I think you’re missing here….to an extent because you acknowledged it to some degree…. is that no matter how many updates the Pegulas give, including mounting a camera and microphone in the hospital room and every room in their house, it will never be enough.  People will relentlessly seek more detail.   Since their own personal health or family member’s health is the underlying topic, they and they alone should draw the line defining how frequent and detailed the updates need to be.  Yesterday a bunch of horrible people on Twitter decided for them.  

[Shaw66]

21 minutes ago, 4merper4mer said:

I don’t think you’re way off in your analysis of society at large but if the Pegulas or anyone else behave the way one “should”  rather than the way to which the world has evolved isn’t that a good thing?  Can’t it be seen as leading by the example of prioritizing real interpersonal relationships over Facebook or whatever else is out there?  The world will never be what it should be until people do what they should do.  As you say, we can’t expect hundreds of thousands of people to behave the way they should.  Agreed.  But that doesn’t mean they should be enabled in that poor behavior like the kid at the bank screaming for a lollipop and mom giving in to shut them up.  Guess what?  When the next part of the errand route is the grocery store the screams for Lucky Charms will only get louder.

 

I also get that the task of updating people has become very simple over the last few decades.  At least technologically simple.  For some people writing stuff like that is emotionally difficult.  A lot of us can probably find out what our 7th grade lab partner had for dinner last Thursday if we really want to find that out.  That person can let us know very easily.  There normally isn’t enough clamor for that to ensure that the lab partner posts regular dietary updates.  At what point is the line crossed where that person should be compelled to upload pictures of their seafood medley?  
 

What I think you’re missing here….to an extent because you acknowledged it to some degree…. is that no matter how many updates the Pegulas give, including mounting a camera and microphone in the hospital room and every room in their house, it will never be enough.  People will relentlessly seek more detail.   Since their own personal health or family member’s health is the underlying topic, they and they alone should draw the line defining how frequent and detailed the updates need to be.  Yesterday a bunch of horrible people on Twitter decided for them.  

Great response.  I really appreciate the thoughtful discussion.   I think you're right in theory, and I agree with you, but the Pegulas are living in the real world, not a theoretical world. 

 

Yes, it's great that the Pegulas may be modeling the right behavior and asking everyone who's interested in this stuff to grow up and behave the way we should.  I agree with that.  But in a retail business, and they for sure are in a retail business, do you succeed by giving people what you think they need or by giving them what they want?    Amazon gives me what I want, and I come back.  My local cable company gives me what they think I should want, and I'm ready to dump them.  That's why I said "if I were their public relations person."  The practical reality for someone in their position is that this is a public relations issue.   It's all well and good for them to teach us to behave in ways we don't normally behave, but that isn't good public relations.   On the other hand, at some point there's a limit, and they are at the limit - there are some things that are just personal and that's it.  

 

As I said, I think the solution is to be smarter about the public relations and still say there's a limit.   That is, just be a little more more active in saying something, even if that something is "there's nothing new to report, and please continue to respect our privacy."

 

And I have not at all missed the point that you're never going to satisfy all the people.   But I'd guess there are 500,000 people who are very interested in what's going on because they care about Kim.  I know that as the days turned into a week or more without news, I began coming here more often, because I was worried and was getting anxious.   By just being a little active giving news, even if it's "no news," they ease the minds of a lot of those people.   That would meet the needs of at least a couple hundred thousand people, without in any way violating their privacy.  Yes, some other people will be idiots about it, but a good PR person knows he isn't going to win over everyone.   

 

Terry's a big boy.   He's used to making hard decisions, and he's used to taking advice.   I'm surprised the Bills' PR people aren't suggesting, once every four or five days, a simple statement.   Having said that, it truly is a personal decision, so who knows how Terry is feeling right now?   Or Kim?   One of them may be saying "absolutely no."   

[Buffalo_Stampede]

No update but Jessica Pegula focused on her career is a good sign.

 

 

[BringBackFergy]

Excellent news! Very happy for their family.

[eball]

30 minutes ago, Buffalo_Stampede said:

No update but Jessica Pegula focused on her career is a good sign.

 

 

 

She won her 1st round match at Wimbledon earlier today.

[CorkScrewHill]

48 minutes ago, eball said:

 

She won her 1st round match at Wimbledon earlier today.

And gave a bit of an update on Kim

"She’s doing a lot better now. That’s why I'm here. If she wasn’t doing well, I probably wouldn't have come. I flew out Wednesday last week, and within that time she was in a really good condition, where I felt like everything was fine, and I felt like my family had everything under control. She’s progressing and she’s been doing rehab,” said Pegula, who faces Harriet Dart of Britain next. “I felt comfortable coming here. But that’s why I didn’t play any warmup tournaments.”

 

https://www.sfgate.com/sports/article/Pegula-almost-didn-t-go-to-Wimbledon-now-she-17274807.php

 

[Doc]

3 hours ago, MattM said:

Very glad to see this, too.
 

Not to sound too "tin foil hatty," but with gambling allowed on Wimbledon matches, were I king I would check into whether any large wagers were made against Jessie for that match and see if there's any connection between any such wagers and those who started the rumors. The rumor just seemed a bit too oddly timed and weirdly specific to be totally random....

 

I thought the same thing, although more that it was people on her competitors' side starting the rumor, because I doubt there's much betting on early matches of women's singles.

[teef]

i get it.  we all appreciate the pegulas...espeically kim, but this level of involvement is getting a bit too much for me.  we all have our own problems.  i wish her luck and that she gets better, but i'm not sure how anyone puts more mental time into it than that.  i'm sure she'd feel the same way concerning any of us.

[Jauronimo]

3 hours ago, Gugny said:

All this "family" talk is kinda creepy.

Mafia means family to us!  And not something to do with violence or organized crime which is just preposterous.

[Gugny]

8 minutes ago, Jauronimo said:

Mafia means family to us!  And not something to do with violence or organized crime which is just preposterous.

 

La Pegula Cosa Nostra

 

[JoeF]

9 minutes ago, Gugny said:

 

La Pegula Cosa Nostra

 

Is football a team game, like baseball?  I could see Kim playing the Al Capone role from the Untouchables when she is off the Injury list.