JarHeadJim Posted May 9, 2005 Posted May 9, 2005 If men wrote advice coulumns! > > > Q My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me. > > > > A Obviously your husband cannot get enough of > you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing > your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can only bring you > closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates > involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him > be with your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just > perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it. > > > > Q My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him. > > > > A Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to > your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to > perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. > The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day: > then cook him a nice meal. > > > > Q My husband has too many nights out with the boys. > > > > A This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. > The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. > A night out chasing young single girls is great stress relief and can > foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can > rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or > two (it's great time to clean the house too!) Just look at how > emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best > thing to do when he returns home is for you and your best friend to > perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal. > > > > Q My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is. > > > > A Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess > with it do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You > may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to > your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform > oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal. > > > > Q My husband is uninterested in foreplay. > > > > A You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek > sensitivity training. Foreplay to man is very stressful and time > consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky > requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your > man as much as you should; He should never have to work to get you in > the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by > performing oral sex on him and cooking him a nice meal. > > > > Q My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep > without giving me one. > > > > A I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to > cook him a nice meal. >
EC-Bills Posted May 9, 2005 Posted May 9, 2005 I'll pass this one on to my wife and see what she thinks...
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