I think that I just lost my colon

[TheCockSportif]

So I got into BBQ (smoking) a few years ago, and today I started a brisket (flat) at around 9am.  I just made this BBQ sauce with habanero and mango.

 

Finally whizzed it up in the blender, and yeah there was coughing earlier when the habanero hit the hot pan, but jeeeeez... I think that after I finished blending it and tasting it, that after coughing, that my colon just fell out in my boxer briefs.

 

The sauce is really good, btw.  Spicy and sweet.  But dang.  You need a colon for a proper lifestyle, right?

[K-9]

[Augie]

1 hour ago, Groin said:

So I got into BBQ (smoking) a few years ago, and today I started a brisket (flat) at around 9am.  I just made this BBQ sauce with habanero and mango.

 

Finally whizzed it up in the blender, and yeah there was coughing earlier when the habanero hit the hot pan, but jeeeeez... I think that after I finished blending it and tasting it, that after coughing, that my colon just fell out in my boxer briefs.

 

The sauce is really good, btw.  Spicy and sweet.  But dang.  You need a colon for a proper lifestyle, right?

 

If you’d be kind enough to share that recipe, I’m sure someone here would try it after that ringing endorsement! I mean, colons are a first world luxury, right? Maybe bring some to a tailgate. Let’s put the porta-potty lines to the test! 

[Ridgewaycynic2013]

Then use an after shave instead... 

Edited December 5, 2021 by Ridgewaycynic2013

[TheCockSportif]

2 minutes ago, Augie said:

 

If you’d be kind enough to share that recipe, I’m sure someone here would try it after that ringing endorsement! I mean, colons are a first world luxury, right? Maybe bring some to a tailgate. Let’s put the porta-potty lines to the test! 

HAHA!

 

The recipe is actually on point, but the habaneros were way, way worse than I thought.

 

So, without further ado...

 

habaneros (8 is a mistake, which was mine today.  use like 2-3, and seed them)

the "meat" of two ripe mangos

1 medium yellow onion

5 cloves garlic

1tsp (or to taste) smoked paprika

1tsp (or to taste) ground cumin

1tsp (or to taste) ground mustard

8 tbsp raw honey

6oz tomato paste

3/4c apple cider vinegar

1/2c water

salt, pepper

 

Once this all cooks down then blend.  Tighten your sphincter.  Call Dr Phil.  I don't care what you do, but my god, wear a mask and goggles.  We should have plenty of masks around at this point.

1 minute ago, Ridgewaycynic2013 said:

Then use an after shave instead... 

After shaving what?!

[Ridgewaycynic2013]

Just now, Groin said:

After shaving what?!

Sounds like no need to shave, or otherwise depilatory.  Sounds like any residual hair burned off. 😁

[TheCockSportif]

6 minutes ago, Ridgewaycynic2013 said:

Sounds like no need to shave, or otherwise depilatory.  Sounds like any residual hair burned off. 😁

I have lost the hair around my anus.  Thank goodness that I'm on laundry duty tonight so I can remove that asterisk from our presence.

[Augie]

12 minutes ago, Groin said:

HAHA!

 

The recipe is actually on point, but the habaneros were way, way worse than I thought.

 

So, without further ado...

 

habaneros (8 is a mistake, which was mine today.  use like 2-3, and seed them)

the "meat" of two ripe mangos

1 medium yellow onion

5 cloves garlic

1tsp (or to taste) smoked paprika

1tsp (or to taste) ground cumin

1tsp (or to taste) ground mustard

8 tbsp raw honey

6oz tomato paste

3/4c apple cider vinegar

1/2c water

salt, pepper

 

Once this all cooks down then blend.  Tighten your sphincter.  Call Dr Phil.  I don't care what you do, but my god, wear a mask and goggles.  We should have plenty of masks around at this point.

After shaving what?!

 

That actually sounds pretty good. I absolutely LOVE just about anything mango, and a little heat sounds good. I’ll be honest, I’ve never been bold enough to try anything with habernero. You did not change my mind! My colon and I are quite fond of each other.

 

Maybe I start with ONE, and see how that goes……

[TheCockSportif]

1 minute ago, Augie said:

 

That actually sounds pretty good. I absolutely LOVE just about anything mango, and a little heat sounds good. I’ll be honest, I’ve never been bold enough to try anything with habernero. You did not change my mind! My colon and I are quite fond of each other.

 

Maybe I start with ONE, and see how that goes……

So, we built this sick garden last spring.  It was hot early in Maine this past May, and things started growing quickly.  But our peppers weren't hot enough, and that included the jalapeños and habaneros.  I think that I overcompensated today.  Many friends locally will get a gift of this angry sauce about two weeks from now.

Edited December 5, 2021 by Groin

[Augie]

13 minutes ago, Groin said:

So, we built this sick garden last spring.  It was hot early in Maine this past May, and things started growing quickly.  But our peppers weren't hot enough, and that included the jalapeños and habaneros.  I think that I overcompensated today.  Many friends locally will get a gift of this angry sauce about two weeks from now.

 

Are they friends, or are they “friends”.  Sounds like a good holiday gift for a Patriots* fan. 

[TheCockSportif]

Just now, Augie said:

 

Are they friends, or are they “friends”.  Sounds like a good holiday gift for a Patriots* fan. 

So true, and as someone who lives in New England and who had to hear about the Pats CONSTANTLY, they're real friends who should also be lit up.  HAHA!

[Bad Things]

Ha!

I had a similar experience last year, when I grew some Trinidad Scorpion chilis in the garden.  I also tried to do a mango hot sauce with them, but all I remember was pain.  A lot of pain.

 

 

[muppy]

have you seen any chili that is kept behind lock and key and you need to sign a waiver to buy the stuff that you wont hold the proprietor liable for damages...here in seaport village there is just such a store (or used to be pre covid)

 

LOL dang I THINK it may be too hot for human consumption if you need to sign a medical waiver just sayin' lol

 

There is habaneros and then there are HABANEROs Lord have mercy!!!

 

m

 

[The Poojer]

I grew 7 different ultra hots this year.  Made a couple batches of hot sauce and a batch of chile sauce.  Now I have over a hundred peppers I dehydrated for future use.  You need to be careful with them, sometimes even a single pepper can completely overwhelm something, but damn I love cooking with them

[Buffalo716]

Sweet baby Ray's makes a mango habanero sauce if someone wanted to just pick it up

[muppy]

18 minutes ago, The Poojer said:

I grew 7 different ultra hots this year.  Made a couple batches of hot sauce and a batch of chile sauce.  Now I have over a hundred peppers I dehydrated for future use.  You need to be careful with them, sometimes even a single pepper can completely overwhelm something, but damn I love cooking with them

the REALLY good chili is so hot but tastes sooo good the tears be running down yer face and you just don't care. With freshly made warm tortilla chips I eat too much of that before dinner and frankly Im not too upset about that haha

 

m

[Marv's Neighbor]

6 hours ago, Augie said:

Any chance we can feed a batch to the ref's before tomorrow's game??

If you’d be kind enough to share that recipe, I’m sure someone here would try it after that ringing endorsement! I mean, colons are a first world luxury, right? Maybe bring some to a tailgate. Let’s put the porta-potty lines to the test! 

 

7 hours ago, Groin said:

So I got into BBQ (smoking) a few years ago, and today I started a brisket (flat) at around 9am.  I just made this BBQ sauce with habanero and mango.

 

Finally whizzed it up in the blender, and yeah there was coughing earlier when the habanero hit the hot pan, but jeeeeez... I think that after I finished blending it and tasting it, that after coughing, that my colon just fell out in my boxer briefs.

 

The sauce is really good, btw.  Spicy and sweet.  But dang.  You need a colon for a proper lifestyle, right?

 

[Draconator]

6 hours ago, Groin said:

HAHA!

 

The recipe is actually on point, but the habaneros were way, way worse than I thought.

 

So, without further ado...

 

habaneros (8 is a mistake, which was mine today.  use like 2-3, and seed them)

the "meat" of two ripe mangos

1 medium yellow onion

5 cloves garlic

1tsp (or to taste) smoked paprika

1tsp (or to taste) ground cumin

1tsp (or to taste) ground mustard

8 tbsp raw honey

6oz tomato paste

3/4c apple cider vinegar

1/2c water

salt, pepper

 

Once this all cooks down then blend.  Tighten your sphincter.  Call Dr Phil.  I don't care what you do, but my god, wear a mask and goggles.  We should have plenty of masks around at this point.

 

I may go with the 8 habaneros. The hot sauce I use is 6 million Scoville heat. I might find the original recipe mighty tasty. 

[Wacka]

If you could manage the heat before, you are getting old. Same with the hair loss. 35-40 years ago I could take the suicidal wings no problem. Now I can barely stand the med ones.  Tried the sriracha sauce once at Subway a couple years ago. Only once. Was  blasting off the commode the next day.

Edited December 6, 2021 by Wacka

[teef]

my colon was punched a while back by ghost pepper wings.  the taste was fantastic, but the outcome was not fantastic.  i'm not doing it anymore.