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Posted (edited)

I have mentioned my elderly mom on this board before. She lost her battle with dementia this afternoon. She had turned 95 on 9/1. She was a widow since 1990 when my dad died at 60. She had shown slight signs in her late 80s, but her mobility was greatly reduced when she broke a foot about 4 years ago.  She was able to be by herself until almost 3 years ago, when she caught pneumonia and  then needed constant supervision. She declined slowly and her doctor referred her to Hospice (angels on earth) in April. They were coming every 2 weeks and then weekly, and after her birthday, she quickly went downhill. We called them Sunday and had them check her vitals that were OK.  They were scheduled to come today, but we asked them to come earlier in the day if possible.  They did and provided her oxygen at 3 or 4. She passed about 6:50. At home and in bed like she wanted.

If you are younger, cherish every moment with your parents. We only have so much . She helped me when I has in trouble and I was glad to help her out now in this part of her life.

 

Edited by Wacka
  • Sad 30
Posted

You have my sympathy. 

 

My mother's health was not good for many years and only time it improved was on a trip to Hong Kong to my wife's sister's wedding where she and my mother-in-law to exercise each morning on the mountain.

My mother went from living alone to living with my sister to retirement home my sister worked as a nurse.

Unfortunately as she got older she became uncommunicative and unhappy that some in family did not visit her.

She was in hospice having decided to withhold all medication and died before I could travel there.

  • Sad 1
Posted

We live about a mile from their main facility in Cheektowaga. When we called they were here in a few minutes. Another gracious gift from the Ralph Wilson Estate. As I said, they are angels on earth.

 

Had a weird thing Sunday morning.  Was out shopping  for a few minutes and I get a call from my mom's cell phone. No one there. It has sitting in a drawer for over a  year with no minutes and a dead battery.  Come home and my brother is sitting with her at the kitchen table(her in a lay-Z-boyrecliner) and I ask him if he used the phone. No way he replies.  That was about the time she really started being incoherent.  Was it somehow a message from her?

Posted

sorry for your loss wacka.  my parents are heading towards 82, so i'm starting to think about this a lot lately.  my mom's brother in law passed away at 90 recently.  when i was giving her condolences, she let me know not to be sorry because he, "won".  he was 90, died in his bed, with his kids and family around him.  to live that long and die that way i suppose are wins.  even though your mom wasn't in great health at 95...she won.

  • Awesome! (+1) 1
Posted

We were blessed that we had her for so long with her wits about her. Had good genes in her family. Was one of 9 siblings, she was in the middle. Oldest died at 98 in 2014. Baby of the family died in the same year at 83. Her mom was 76 and her dad was 94 when he died. Her only survive sibling is 91.

  • Awesome! (+1) 2
Posted

RIP... Long wonderful life!  My neighbor is 95, still living alone, which is incredible! She has friends and family helping her.  She was even driving up to a few years ago... But crashing through the garage ended that.   I just helped her by changing out a bad cable box yesterday.   She is glued to that tube! 😆... 

 

Can't say it enough, all my condolences.  Your mother was part of an amazing generation.   They've been through a lot, saw a lot of change!

Posted
1 hour ago, Wacka said:

We live about a mile from their main facility in Cheektowaga. When we called they were here in a few minutes. Another gracious gift from the Ralph Wilson Estate. As I said, they are angels on earth.

 

Had a weird thing Sunday morning.  Was out shopping  for a few minutes and I get a call from my mom's cell phone. No one there. It has sitting in a drawer for over a  year with no minutes and a dead battery.  Come home and my brother is sitting with her at the kitchen table(her in a lay-Z-boyrecliner) and I ask him if he used the phone. No way he replies.  That was about the time she really started being incoherent.  Was it somehow a message from her?

God bless, Wacka. I've had two similarly odd experiences regarding my best friend twenty years ago and my uncle. The world is strangely connected, "entangled" the quantum folks say. Not sure if you are a man of faith. I believe ultimately our sorrows are healed. I know it was a long task of love and a hard endurance for you. I'll be praying for you.

Posted

Hey man - so sorry to hear this. I know you'll hear that she was 95 and lived a long life but it's never enough - you always want all the time in the world with your family. My wife has worked in hospice for almost 25 years (not as a clinician), and we see how valuable hospice is to so many people - I hope they were able to help and make sure your mother's last times were as good as they could be. No words that I can express to make this loss go away, but hang in there - you have our support.

  • Like (+1) 1
Posted

So sorry for your loss

We had a similar experience with my mom, she passed 12 years ago at 86.

The care givers are absolute angels and we were eternally grateful for the wonderful care she received.

God bless you and your family.

 

 

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