Job offer question

[EmotionallyUnstable]

On 8/9/2021 at 9:17 PM, Buffalo716 said:

I'm sure for some but not all.. that's just generalization 

 

I know some millennials who work 80-100 hour weeks so there wifes don't have to work

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Interesting. 
 

Im in that generation, with two working parents and children. 
 

Out of curiosity, do they stay home to take care of kids?

[Buffalo716]

2 minutes ago, EmotionallyUnstable said:

Interesting. 
 

Im in that generation, with two working parents and children. 
 

Out of curiosity, do they stay home to take care of kids?

My friends who work 100 hour weeks? 

 

No, they work that much.. so their wife could be a stay-at-home mom

[EmotionallyUnstable]

1 minute ago, Buffalo716 said:

My friends who work 100 hour weeks? 

 

No, they work that much.. so their wife could be a stay-at-home mom

Right, that’s what I meant. 
 

I think that’s a pretty common occurrence, considering the costs of child care in our country. We’ve discussed it, but it doesn’t make sense for us right now 

[Buffalo716]

Just now, EmotionallyUnstable said:

Right, that’s what I meant. 
 

I think that’s a pretty common occurrence, considering the costs of child care in our country. We’ve discussed it, but it doesn’t make sense for us right now 

But the cost of living a pride doesn't make sense for many people 

 

But if you have a paid off mortgage or a cheap one.. it's something that might be possible

[Jauronimo]

On 8/9/2021 at 8:17 PM, Buffalo716 said:

I'm sure for some but not all.. that's just generalization 

 

I know some millennials who work 80-100 hour weeks so there wifes don't have to work

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mormons have a notoriously strong work ethic.

[Gugny]

11 hours ago, Buffalo716 said:

My friends who work 100 hour weeks? 

 

No, they work that much.. so their wife could be a stay-at-home mom

 

If my son ever tries to marry this kind of a lazy slut, I'll punch him in the face.

[Buffalo716]

9 minutes ago, Gugny said:

 

If my son ever tries to marry this kind of a lazy slut, I'll punch him in the face.

It's not even about laziness to them .. my friends are the boss and tell them to not work and raise the kids 

 

They make enough money and want their wife to be full time stay at home moms.. it's my friends call , not the wives.. especially when you have 3-4 children in a row and prefer not to use child care 

 

It might be different when the kids are older

Edited August 16, 2021 by Buffalo716

[Gugny]

3 hours ago, Buffalo716 said:

It's not even about laziness to them .. my friends are the boss and tell them to not work and raise the kids 

 

They make enough money and want their wife to be full time stay at home moms.. it's my friends call , not the wives.. especially when you have 3-4 children in a row and prefer not to use child care 

 

It might be different when the kids are older

 

Oh, well in that case, I totally get it.  I mean, as long as she's got dinner ready every night, never lets hubby's beer get empty and only speaks when spoken to.

[eball]

I’m confused about one thing — FMLA has nothing to do with pay.  It’s a protection in place to keep your job when you’re out for a medical/health reason.  If you’re getting paid during your paternity leave that’s either a specific company policy, your PTO, or a supplemental insurance plan.

 

Anyway, ignore the Neanderthals telling you taking paternity leave will make female management downgrade you.

 

My rules about employment decisions:  be up front, be ethical, think long term, and don’t apologize for doing what’s best for you.

 

[Back2Buff]

59 minutes ago, eball said:

I’m confused about one thing — FMLA has nothing to do with pay.  It’s a protection in place to keep your job when you’re out for a medical/health reason.  If you’re getting paid during your paternity leave that’s either a specific company policy, your PTO, or a supplemental insurance plan.

 

Anyway, ignore the Neanderthals telling you taking paternity leave will make female management downgrade you.

 

My rules about employment decisions:  be up front, be ethical, think long term, and don’t apologize for doing what’s best for you.

 

 

NYS has Paid FMLA.  Its pretty substantial too.  Many dads have been taking advantage of it.

[eball]

12 minutes ago, Back2Buff said:

 

NYS has Paid FMLA.  Its pretty substantial too.  Many dads have been taking advantage of it.

Ahh, did not know that! Thx. 

[WhoTom]

17 hours ago, Buffalo716 said:

My friends who work 100 hour weeks? 

 

No, they work that much.. so their wife could be a stay-at-home mom

 

6 hours ago, Gugny said:

If my son ever tries to marry this kind of a lazy slut, I'll punch him in the face.

 

6 hours ago, Buffalo716 said:

It's not even about laziness to them .. my friends are the boss and tell them to not work and raise the kids 

 

They make enough money and want their wife to be full time stay at home moms.. it's my friends call , not the wives.

 

If my son ever tries to marry a woman who doesn't think for herself, I'll punch him in the face.

 

 

[Gugny]

3 minutes ago, WhoTom said:

 

 

 

If my son ever tries to marry a woman who doesn't think for herself, I'll punch him in the face.

 

 

 

We are good dads.

[LeviF]

lmao some really hot takes about stay-at-home moms here.

 

I retired my wife.  If she wants to sell ***** on Etsy or go get a cute little part time job when my kid(s) are older she can feel free.  She wants to be a mom and by good fortune and hard work I have the ability to make that a reality for her.  It's criminal that most families in this country can't pay a mortgage and put food on the table on one income. 

 

But to send her back to the salon six weeks after giving birth so we can take $1500 a month out of her take-home to pay for full time daycare is the epitome of stupid.  Not to mention the dozens of reports about daycares I had to handle in my time at CPS. 

 

I guess that's the price I pay for marrying a stupid, lazy slut, huh guys?  I'm sure my dad will love to hear about the ways he failed me from you titans of virility. 

[WhoTom]

27 minutes ago, LeviF said:

lmao some really hot takes about stay-at-home moms here.

 

I have no problem with stay-at-home moms. My wife did it, but it was by mutual choice, not because "I said so."

 

Show me a marriage where one person always dictates and the other always complies, and I'll show you two insecure people.

 

[LeviF]

4 minutes ago, WhoTom said:

 

I have no problem with stay-at-home moms. My wife did it, but it was by mutual choice, not because "I said so."

 

Show me a marriage where one person always dictates and the other always complies, and I'll show you two insecure people.

 

 

lol with the way marriage and divorce works in the US there is no woman who doesn't have the option to just take the kids, half his income, and the house.  She made the choice whether you (or her husband) think she did or not.

[YoloinOhio]

I work in HR. You won’t “burn a bridge” if you resign in a professional manner. You will need to consider the timing needs of the future employer in terms of whether you start prior to or after your 8 weeks is up. We have numerous new mothers who use their full 16 weeks and then say they aren’t returning. It’s common and not that unexpected tbh. We have tons of new dad who take the full paternity leave (it is 6 weeks for us).  In the end, the more notice you give your current employer, the better, so they can replace you. 

[Buffalo716]

8 hours ago, Gugny said:

 

Oh, well in that case, I totally get it.  I mean, as long as she's got dinner ready every night, never lets hubby's beer get empty and only speaks when spoken to.

 

5 hours ago, LeviF said:

 

lol with the way marriage and divorce works in the US there is no woman who doesn't have the option to just take the kids, half his income, and the house.  She made the choice whether you (or her husband) think she did or not.

I think you're underestimating that there are still some really conservative, submissive women

 

Who want a man, to be the man of the house.. the classic 1950s Man of the House.. there were tons of mothers who didn't work back then

 

They're still some women like that.. 

 

Can she leave and take half his stuff, absolutely, but my friend is absolutely in charge of the family

8 hours ago, Gugny said:

 

Oh, well in that case, I totally get it.  I mean, as long as she's got dinner ready every night, never lets hubby's beer get empty and only speaks when spoken to.

If you saw their relationship, dichotomy is not far off

 

She's a classic 1950s stay-at-home mom.. and if people think that doesn't exist anymore their mistaken 

 

Their relationship definitely isn't perfect, but he's definitely the man of the house, and in charge

 

 

Edited August 16, 2021 by Buffalo716

[NoSaint]

8 hours ago, eball said:

I’m confused about one thing — FMLA has nothing to do with pay.  It’s a protection in place to keep your job when you’re out for a medical/health reason.  If you’re getting paid during your paternity leave that’s either a specific company policy, your PTO, or a supplemental insurance plan.

 

Anyway, ignore the Neanderthals telling you taking paternity leave will make female management downgrade you.

 

My rules about employment decisions:  be up front, be ethical, think long term, and don’t apologize for doing what’s best for you.

 

and don’t always be up front. 
 

because HR is not your advocate by design. Don’t be an ass, but look out for yourself across these transitions and know hr is there to generally protect the company and not you.

[eball]

12 minutes ago, NoSaint said:

and don’t always be up front. 
 

because HR is not your advocate by design. Don’t be an ass, but look out for yourself across these transitions and know hr is there to generally protect the company and not you.

 

I'm really speaking with regard to one's boss, not HR.  And "up front" doesn't mean telling them everything, but it does mean not hiding something material.