Battle of the Mascots

[EmotionallyUnstable]

If it were a royal rumble, comprised of a be 32 NFL team mascots, which team would you see as the “Super Bowl Champion” in 2020. 
 

Football and thoughts on the respective cities aside, if we could humanize these teams as their mascot (think space jam-esq) who would win? 
 

Giants? Or do they suffer from respiratory CoVID related issues. 

 

Vikings? There is the argument their kind has gone extinct. 
 

Jets? Who you scaring, JetBlue?

 

Colts? I mean, come on!
 

Football Team? Well, at least they’ll beat the colts! 
 

 

 

 

Edited December 12, 2020 by EmotionallyUnstable

[PastaJoe]

Cowboys, Bills, and Patriots would have guns. So they could shoot all the animal teams, as well as the Vikings, Chiefs, Giants, Buccaneers, 49ers, Steelers, Titans, Raiders, Packers, and Redguys. The Texans don’t necessarily all have guns so they’re out. The Jets would have to Kamikaze to take out others so they wouldn’t survive. And the Patriots would have older guns so they’d be outshot. And the Bills are really just one guy, so he’d be outnumbered. That leaves the Cowboys. But then you have the elvish Browns who could use magic to overcome the guns. And finally you have the Saints who are God’s soldiers, and they’d crush the Brownies and be the last ones standing.

[frostbitmic]

Bucs - Have Sabres, Guns and Cannons

[thenorthremembers]

Easy one, its the Chargers.   Nothing on the list survives a lightning strike.

[PastaJoe]

1 hour ago, thenorthremembers said:

Easy one, its the Chargers.   Nothing on the list survives a lightning strike.

If Chargers are horses they’d be shot. Otherwise Saints can survive lightning.

[Johnny Hammersticks]

Billy Buffalo ain’t kicking anyone’s ass.

[LeGOATski]

Obviously, the Titans would destroy all. Not really a fair fight.

[thenorthremembers]

1 hour ago, PastaJoe said:

If Chargers are horses they’d be shot. Otherwise Saints can survive lightning.

Not many Saints are alive while getting the honor.  Going with nature over dead humans everytime.

[PastaJoe]

4 minutes ago, thenorthremembers said:

Not many Saints are alive while getting the honor.  Going with nature over dead humans everytime.

Saints are living in heaven, or so we’ve been told, and therefore can’t be physically harmed.

[4merper4mer]

11 hours ago, PastaJoe said:

Saints are living in heaven, or so we’ve been told, and therefore can’t be physically harmed.

If Dan Snyder sees this thread Washington will be named the JesusAllahYahweh's

[thenorthremembers]

12 hours ago, PastaJoe said:

Saints are living in heaven, or so we’ve been told, and therefore can’t be physically harmed.

Touche.  The Saints it is.

[Nextmanup]

17 hours ago, LeGOATski said:

Obviously, the Titans would destroy all. Not really a fair fight.

 The Super Bowl of mascots would be played by the 2 most powerful teams:

 

Saints vs. Titans.  

Both are supernatural creatures and would have little problem wiping out all animals and all people, even with guns and modern weapons.  

 

So then who wins Saints vs. Titans?  Old school polytheism vs. modern monotheism. 

 

Not sure.  I guess a Saint could take down a titan, so I'll go Titans as the champion.

 

 

[LeGOATski]

4 hours ago, Nextmanup said:

 The Super Bowl of mascots would be played by the 2 most powerful teams:

 

Saints vs. Titans.  

Both are supernatural creatures and would have little problem wiping out all animals and all people, even with guns and modern weapons.  

 

So then who wins Saints vs. Titans?  Old school polytheism vs. modern monotheism. 

 

Not sure.  I guess a Saint could take down a titan, so I'll go Titans as the champion.

 

 

New Orleans' "Saints" moniker is referencing those humans throughout history who were close to God. Not some supernaturul creature. Just normal, easily-killable homosapiens. 

21 hours ago, PastaJoe said:

Saints are living in heaven, or so we’ve been told, and therefore can’t be physically harmed.

They're also not going to physically harm anything else...they'd be passive at best. Titans win by forfeit, I guess.

[DaBillsFanSince1973]

23 hours ago, Johnny Hammersticks said:

Billy Buffalo ain’t kicking anyone’s ass.

you know, that's my thought as well, he's kind of whimpish. need a steam from the strils snorting, feet stomping, teeth chomping mean ass buffalo as a mascot.

 

no, billy buffalo wont represent in any battle, nope.

[Johnny Hammersticks]

7 minutes ago, A Firm Tree Does Not Fear said:

you know, that's my thought as well, he's kind of whimpish. need a steam from the strils snorting, feet stomping, teeth chomping mean ass buffalo as a mascot.

 

no, billy buffalo wont represent in any battle, nope.

 

I think the dolphin would even work Billy over.

[EmotionallyUnstable]

I’m pretty sure the Giants aren’t getting as much love as they deserve 

[Nextmanup]

On 12/17/2020 at 5:52 PM, LeGOATski said:

New Orleans' "Saints" moniker is referencing those humans throughout history who were close to God. Not some supernaturul creature. Just normal, easily-killable homosapiens. 

They're also not going to physically harm anything else...they'd be passive at best. Titans win by forfeit, I guess.

"Close to God" huh?

 

 🙄

 

 

[LeGOATski]

On 12/17/2020 at 4:38 PM, Johnny Hammersticks said:

 

I think the dolphin would even work Billy over.

I watched Flipper. Dude was a badass. Turned in on when sharks came around.

3 hours ago, Nextmanup said:

"Close to God" huh?

 

 🙄

 

 

Wut?

[Just Jack]

On 12/16/2020 at 4:44 PM, thenorthremembers said:

Easy one, its the Chargers.   Nothing on the list survives a lightning strike.

 

Except Chargers is in relation to using a credit card....

 

How the Chargers got their name - Bolts From The Blue

 

 

[thenorthremembers]

On 12/28/2020 at 8:38 AM, Just Jack said:

 

Except Chargers is in relation to using a credit card....

 

How the Chargers got their name - Bolts From The Blue

 

 

Well that adds a whole new twist.   Is crippling debt more dangerous than a lighting bolt?