The Poojer Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 I love my beer and I drink good beer any chance I can, no matter time of day, quantity etc.... That being said, I tend to be always relatively in control and can hang for hours. Sure I get buzzed. Lately I notice, people hanging with me get sloppy really quickly, slurring speech, repeating stories, acting out of control etc... I'm mid-upper 50's and I NEVER get to this point. I don't slow down drinking, usually. I just think I have something inside that self regulates me to avoid going that far. I love my wide circle of friends but sometimes I really just can't take it. Am I immune to the effects of alcohol, do I just have more self control than I think I have? It's kinda frustrating because I want to continue to hang out, but sometimes it's just too much for me. EiL, I don't need a lecture. I'm just kinda trying to figure it out. I figure this group is a lot cheaper than a therapist that's going to charge me to tell me what I already know: I need to lose weight and cut back on drinking 1
The Poojer Posted August 16, 2020 Author Posted August 16, 2020 I'm ready for the onslaught of replies, but it's really something I have been wondering about
KD in CA Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 Hard to say without knowing ages and drinking habits of the people you're talking about, but lots of things in play. -Everyone has a different tolerance, both naturally and built up over a lifetime of hard work (aka drinking). -Alcohol has a greater impact as people age...you're just not as young/fit as you once were, but that should be a gradual change. -Social issues could be upping the alcohol intake of some people. Aging isn't graceful for everyone --- plenty of people self-medicate as the dreams of youth slip away. So, I'd say if the same guy is acting very differently than he did ten years ago when you'd hang out, pay attention to how much he's putting away. Otherwise, maybe your circle of friends is just not what it used to be. Or it could be that you're just becoming a cranky old man.
The Poojer Posted August 16, 2020 Author Posted August 16, 2020 we're all 40's to 50's. My question probably boils down to my concern that i am nor reacting like everyone else around me. I tend to always have been like that. Maybe i just subconsciously am able to control it. It just has really started to hit me as odd. and no, i don't think i am becoming cranky...i think i am still pretty accepting of the young sh*ts that walk among me
The Poojer Posted August 16, 2020 Author Posted August 16, 2020 i'm also the type of person that would never bash or speak ill of my ex-wife, never talk about 'sexual exploits' of girls i'd date way back in the 80's when i attempted to date. perhaps i've just never learned to 'guy'. Maybe the problem is all me and not others
Sherlock Holmes Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 (edited) 47 minutes ago, The Poojer said: I love my beer and I drink good beer any chance I can, no matter time of day, quantity etc.... That being said, I tend to be always relatively in control and can hang for hours. Sure I get buzzed. Lately I notice, people hanging with me get sloppy really quickly, slurring speech, repeating stories, acting out of control etc... I'm mid-upper 50's and I NEVER get to this point. I don't slow down drinking, usually. I just think I have something inside that self regulates me to avoid going that far. I love my wide circle of friends but sometimes I really just can't take it. Am I immune to the effects of alcohol, do I just have more self control than I think I have? It's kinda frustrating because I want to continue to hang out, but sometimes it's just too much for me. EiL, I don't need a lecture. I'm just kinda trying to figure it out. I figure this group is a lot cheaper than a therapist that's going to charge me to tell me what I already know: I need to lose weight and cut back on drinking Your tolerance changes from day to day, depends on all kinds of things... mainly what you have eaten and how your adrenal glands are doing that day. I have had days where I could drink a water tower full of moonshine and be fine and then had days where I had a single IPA and I'm slurring my speech... I don't think you should gauge how somebody is acting under the weather as their personality, as it is more like a mood in that it's a temporary state of mind, really just like how hormones influence moods... well it's the same thing as alcohol influences your glands which influence mood. Now if they always act like a d-bag that's another thing! Edited August 16, 2020 by Sherlock Holmes
NoSaint Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 14 minutes ago, The Poojer said: we're all 40's to 50's. My question probably boils down to my concern that i am nor reacting like everyone else around me. I tend to always have been like that. Maybe i just subconsciously am able to control it. It just has really started to hit me as odd. and no, i don't think i am becoming cranky...i think i am still pretty accepting of the young sh*ts that walk among me you’ve never struck me as particularly self aware. Maybe it is hitting you harder than you think. 9 minutes ago, The Poojer said: i'm also the type of person that would never bash or speak ill of my ex-wife, never talk about 'sexual exploits' of girls i'd date way back in the 80's when i attempted to date. perhaps i've just never learned to 'guy'. Maybe the problem is all me and not others Are you drunk now?
Niagara Bill Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 8 hours ago, The Poojer said: i'm also the type of person that would never bash or speak ill of my ex-wife, never talk about 'sexual exploits' of girls i'd date way back in the 80's when i attempted to date. perhaps i've just never learned to 'guy'. Maybe the problem is all me and not others Now there is the problem. You need to look up those girls and ex wife if she is worth the effort. Repeat your conquests ( that would be fun) and that will really give you some stories to talk about over the beer. The guys you are with would shut up and listen, they would not be slurring and you may even get a book offer from a publicist on the stool down the bar, you become rich, and can try more beer and invite all of us for a drink.
Brennan Huff Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 8 hours ago, NoSaint said: Are you drunk now? This definitely feels like a drunk mans thoughts 1
TBBills Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 10 hours ago, The Poojer said: I love my beer and I drink good beer any chance I can, no matter time of day, quantity etc.... That being said, I tend to be always relatively in control and can hang for hours. Sure I get buzzed. Lately I notice, people hanging with me get sloppy really quickly, slurring speech, repeating stories, acting out of control etc... I'm mid-upper 50's and I NEVER get to this point. I don't slow down drinking, usually. I just think I have something inside that self regulates me to avoid going that far. I love my wide circle of friends but sometimes I really just can't take it. Am I immune to the effects of alcohol, do I just have more self control than I think I have? It's kinda frustrating because I want to continue to hang out, but sometimes it's just too much for me. EiL, I don't need a lecture. I'm just kinda trying to figure it out. I figure this group is a lot cheaper than a therapist that's going to charge me to tell me what I already know: I need to lose weight and cut back on drinking You just think you are more sober than you really are. 2
Bill from NYC Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 (edited) Aren't genetic factors involved? For instance: People with native American blood seem to have a lower tolerance for alcohol. I'm sure there are exceptions. Also, many Irish people are said to consume a lot of alcohol, yet I think that their rate of domestic violence (a majority of which involves alcohol to some degree) is low when compared to some other ethnicities. I think this is because (very simply put) most Irishmen can drink a six pack of beer and hold it without getting stupid. The above are opinions based on personal observations, and are not being offered up as scientific knowledge. 18 hours ago, The Poojer said: I love my wide circle of friends but sometimes I really just can't take it. Bro, what is it that you cannot take? Edited August 16, 2020 by Bill from NYC 1
GaryPinC Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 (edited) 10 hours ago, The Poojer said: I'm ready for the onslaught of replies, but it's really something I have been wondering about Well, if you really want to know why you feel you are in control of your alcohol while your friends are not, why not first ask your family if they feel your alcohol consumption is a problem? If the people who love you and know you best feel you're in control then you have your answer. Edited August 16, 2020 by GaryPinC 1
The Poojer Posted August 16, 2020 Author Posted August 16, 2020 Thanks for the responses so far. I was just thinking out loud when I typed it. It’s been a thought for a while and felt if I “said it out out “ I might be able to make sense in my head. Just late night ramblings I suppose. Sad as it may sound, this site often offers me more than any counseling sessions that I’ve paid for. Probably has a lot to do with semi anonymity this place has
NoSaint Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 10 minutes ago, The Poojer said: Thanks for the responses so far. I was just thinking out loud when I typed it. It’s been a thought for a while and felt if I “said it out out “ I might be able to make sense in my head. Just late night ramblings I suppose. Sad as it may sound, this site often offers me more than any counseling sessions that I’ve paid for. Probably has a lot to do with semi anonymity this place has How much did you drink yesterday?
WhoTom Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 10 hours ago, The Poojer said: i'm also the type of person that would never bash or speak ill of my ex-wife, never talk about 'sexual exploits' of girls i'd date way back in the 80's when i attempted to date. perhaps i've just never learned to 'guy'. Maybe the problem is all me and not others Sounds more like you learned to "adult" when others didn't. 1
The Poojer Posted August 16, 2020 Author Posted August 16, 2020 29 minutes ago, NoSaint said: How much did you drink yesterday? I had 4 total all day, granted somewhat high octane craft beer. It wasn't that much and it was the same as my one buddy
BillsFan4 Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 (edited) Do your friends also drink every day? Could it have something to do with you having a higher tolerance from drinking every day? (and maybe from size/weight if you’re a bigger dude). similar to a daily pot smoker. He/she can smoke a whole joint without getting wrecked, where as a more casual smoker would take a few hits and be stuck on the couch for an hour...lol. I have no tolerance for alcohol anymore (and I’m Irish. Shameful, I know. lol). I get a buzz from 1 beer. I used to be able to drink a 6 pack without catching a buzz. You may also be getting more buzzed than you realize. I think Gary gave some great advise. Ask your family (or whoever is around you most) for their opinions on how you control your drinking. Like for ex, I have a buddy who doesn’t think his drinking is an issue. Says he doesn’t even get buzzed, but I can easily tell when he’s been drinking. He’s totally different but just doesn’t realize it. Then I have other friends who frequently drink and it’s not an issue. Edited August 16, 2020 by BillsFan4
Marv's Neighbor Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 13 hours ago, The Poojer said: I'm ready for the onslaught of replies, but it's really something I have been wondering about Have a beer and don't worry about it.
Gugny Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 1 hour ago, The Poojer said: I had 4 total all day, granted somewhat high octane craft beer. It wasn't that much and it was the same as my one buddy Some people just aren't used to/ready for the high octane stuff. I've had beers with one particular friend who can drink a case of Miller Lite in a day and still be coherent. Give him 4 or 5 Focal Bangers and he's a puddle. 1
LB3 Posted August 16, 2020 Posted August 16, 2020 8 minutes ago, Gugny said: Some people just aren't used to/ready for the high octane stuff. I've had beers with one particular friend who can drink a case of Miller Lite in a day and still be coherent. Give him 4 or 5 Focal Bangers and he's a puddle. 1
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