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Posted

 

 

at America’s Newspaper of Record:

 

 

U.S.—With many Americans eager to get back to work, state governors across the country are responding with their plans for giving everyone permission to be normal human beings again. One state governor is enjoying universal acclaim after unveiling his own innovative plan for getting his state reopened. 

 

The new plan is called 'Our Vision for Health, Safety, Virtue, and Eternal Peace' and is a 37-step, 10-year plan for slowly opening up sections of the state economy. It reads as follows: 

  1. Form an exploratory committee to consult various experts on reopening things
  2. Set date to hear recommendations from the exploratory committee
  3. Create a panel of experts to explore the recommendations recommended by the exploratory committee
  4. Build a brand new website to post exploratory committee recommendations for public comment
  5. Discuss feedback from health experts over catered seafood lunch
  6. Wait 4 weeks to see if catered seafood lunch led to any additional COVID infections
  7. Hire commission to gauge the effectiveness of collaboration over catered seafood lunches
  8. Take away all the guns
  9. Announce a 12-phase reopening of the economy, starting with the businesses with the best lobbyists
  10. Begin Phase 1
  11. Form a new committee to review the effectiveness of Phase 1 before moving on to Phase 2
  12. Order more drones from China and post them in front of every hair salon
  13. Draft new legislation to allow voting by show of hands over Facebook live
  14. Announce reopening of all golf courses in close proximity to the statehouse
  15. Hold public hearings on the effectiveness of the implementation of Phase 1
  16. Repeat parts 1-15 until all 12 phases are completed
  17. Form an exploratory committee to research alternate food sources now that catered seafood no longer available
  18. Draft legislation allowing people to eat squirrels and possums
  19. Overturn squirrels and possums legislation after animal rights groups protest
  20. Hire animal rights groups to enforce the overturning of the legislation in order to protect squirrels and possums
  21. Introduce tax bill to fund arming all police officers with harpoon guns and spears
  22. Strengthen the security of governors mansion with sniper towers and tiger pits
  23. ...Maybe also a moat around the governor’s mansion
  24. More drones from China, maybe bigger ones
  25. Pass new legislation to fund hiring more enforcers to enforce things
  26. Build checkpoints across the state to distribute milk and guzzoline
  27. Create jobs by hiring welders to install armor plating on police cars
  28. (redacted)
  29. (redacted)
  30. (redacted)
  31. (redacted)
  32. (redacted)
  33. (redacted)
  34. (redacted)(redacted)(redacted)(redacted)(redacted)(redacted)
  35. (Super-secret surprise to be determined later)
  36. Open the rest of the economy
  37. Gladiator games anyone?

Other states have announced they will wait 10-15 years to judge the effectiveness of this 37 part plan before releasing their own plans. The only exception is Texas, whose governor simply said, "We're open, y'all!" 

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Posted
22 hours ago, Buffalo_Gal said:


So, when he was interviewed the said that they were not serving liquor so their liquor license would not be revoked. The state revoked it anyway.
 

 


 

 

 

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Posted

....Oregon's governor extended the lockdown to July 6?.....and I thought DiBlasio had a screw loose.......my daughter's birthday is today so I wanted to have a small cookout for the four of us......my daughter in law said, "no we can't do that...Governor Cuomo said NOTHING until May 15"...seriously?.....my daughter "broke ranks" and is coming over for bacon wrapped filet mignon, lobster tails, grilled shrimp and roasted brussel spouts with pancetta/balsamic glaze....Big Fredo is NOT invited.....SMH........

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Posted
Just now, OldTimeAFLGuy said:

....Oregon's governor extended the lockdown to July 6?.....and I thought DiBlasio had a screw loose.......my daughter's birthday is today so I wanted to have a small cookout for the four of us......my daughter in law said, "no we can't do that...Governor Cuomo said NOTHING until May 15"...seriously?.....my daughter "broke ranks" and is coming over for bacon wrapped filet mignon, lobster tails, grilled shrimp and roasted brussel spouts with pancetta/balsamic glaze....Big Fredo is NOT invited.....SMH........

Damn that sounds good. Have an awesome BBQ.

Posted
1 minute ago, OldTimeAFLGuy said:

....Oregon's governor extended the lockdown to July 6?.....

 

No.  But it’s become a misguided talking point. 
 

1 minute ago, OldTimeAFLGuy said:
Posted (edited)
5 minutes ago, shoshin said:

 

No.  But it’s become a misguided talking point. 
 

Executive Order 20-24

Office of the Governor
State of Oregon
 

EXECUTIVE ORDER NO. 20-24 
 
EXTENDING THE COVID-19 DECLARATION OF EMERGENCY (EXECUTIVE ORDER NO. 20-03) FOR AN ADDITIONAL 60 DAYS, THROUGH JULY 6, 2020 
 
Executive Order 20-03, declaring a state of emergency due to the COVID-19 outbreak in Oregon, was issued on March 8, 2020, and declared a statewide emergency for 60 days, through May 7, 2020. 
 
Pursuant to ORS 401.165 and ORS 401.204, I find that the novel infectious coronavirus (COVID-19) continues to threaten public health and safety, and remains a statewide emergency under ORS 401.025. Accordingly, I am extending the state of emergency for an additional 60 days, through July 6, 2020. Executive Order 20-03 shall remain in effect through July 6, 2020, unless extended or terminated earlier by the Governor. 
 
Done at Salem, Oregon, this 1st day of May, 2020. 
Edited by OldTimeAFLGuy
Posted
32 minutes ago, OldTimeAFLGuy said:

....Oregon's governor extended the lockdown to July 6?.....and I thought DiBlasio had a screw loose.......my daughter's birthday is today so I wanted to have a small cookout for the four of us......my daughter in law said, "no we can't do that...Governor Cuomo said NOTHING until May 15"...seriously?.....my daughter "broke ranks" and is coming over for bacon wrapped filet mignon, lobster tails, grilled shrimp and roasted brussel spouts with pancetta/balsamic glaze....Big Fredo is NOT invited.....SMH........

And May 15 was just window dressing until Cuomo’s next extension. 

Posted
9 minutes ago, Boatdrinks said:

And May 15 was just window dressing until Cuomo’s next extension. 

  I don't see malls, casinos, and churches opening any time soon here in NY.

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Posted
46 minutes ago, OldTimeAFLGuy said:

....Oregon's governor extended the lockdown to July 6?.....and I thought DiBlasio had a screw loose.......my daughter's birthday is today so I wanted to have a small cookout for the four of us......my daughter in law said, "no we can't do that...Governor Cuomo said NOTHING until May 15"...seriously?.....my daughter "broke ranks" and is coming over for bacon wrapped filet mignon, lobster tails, grilled shrimp and roasted brussel spouts with pancetta/balsamic glaze....Big Fredo is NOT invited.....SMH........

What time?

Posted
10 minutes ago, Boatdrinks said:

And May 15 was just window dressing until Cuomo’s next extension. 

 

 

...logically and realistically how can there be a "date certain...ALL better" mark on one's calendar?.....it is a moving target to appease the masses IMO, buying time until May 14.......certainly the pandemic has been nothing like anything since perhaps 1917 and invoking crisis management with no other choice......bigger fear is that this becomes a "cry wolf" syndrome after all is done...it does NOT help with the politically charged climate focusing on minutia for just that, political gain......more widespread testing is increasing numbers and with a populus of 330 million, it will take time.....yet more cases and more deaths are politically charged for THAT purpose only.....HYPOTHETICALLY, if and a BIG IF, Covid-19 turns out to be a similar yet perhaps heightened flu type phenomenon, I'm certain (COUGH) there will be a long list of MSM "mea culpas(CHOKING)".....

14 minutes ago, 3rdnlng said:

What time?

 

 

...2:30 bro......mask is NOT required.....:D

Posted
1 minute ago, OldTimeAFLGuy said:

 

 

...logically and realistically how can there be a "date certain...ALL better" mark on one's calendar?.....it is a moving target to appease the masses IMO, buying time until May 14.......certainly the pandemic has been nothing like anything since perhaps 1917 and invoking crisis management with no other choice......bigger fear is that this becomes a "cry wolf" syndrome after all is done...it does NOT help with the politically charged climate focusing on minutia for just that, political gain......more widespread testing is increasing numbers and with a populus of 330 million, it will take time.....yet more cases and more deaths are politically charged for THAT purpose only.....HYPOTHETICALLY, if and a BIG IF, Covid-19 turns out to be a similar yet perhaps heightened flu type phenomenon, I'm certain (COUGH) there will be a long list of MSM "mea culpas(CHOKING)".....

 

 

...2:30 bro......mask is NOT required.....:D

What can I bring?

Posted
3 minutes ago, 3rdnlng said:

What can I bring?

...nothing...libations include Stella, Woodford Reserve Bourbon (123 proof), White Claw and Caymus Cabernet........perhaps a pillow??..........

Posted
22 minutes ago, RochesterRob said:

  I don't see malls, casinos, and churches opening any time soon here in NY.

I agree. Cuomo will keep moving the goalposts while instructing the populace to stay calm, while showing graphs / charts of the duration of past wars. He never mentions any specific target number, just that current numbers aren’t good enough. He’s pretty much planning to keep NY in shutdown mode until sometime after the November election. 

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Posted (edited)
16 minutes ago, Deranged Rhino said:

 

 

I've never seen a man who is more clearly a White Supremacist than that dude.

Edited by Koko78
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Posted (edited)
4 hours ago, OldTimeAFLGuy said:

Executive Order 20-24

Office of the Governor
State of Oregon
 

EXECUTIVE ORDER NO. 20-24 
 
EXTENDING THE COVID-19 DECLARATION OF EMERGENCY (EXECUTIVE ORDER NO. 20-03) FOR AN ADDITIONAL 60 DAYS, THROUGH JULY 6, 2020 
 
Executive Order 20-03, declaring a state of emergency due to the COVID-19 outbreak in Oregon, was issued on March 8, 2020, and declared a statewide emergency for 60 days, through May 7, 2020. 
 
Pursuant to ORS 401.165 and ORS 401.204, I find that the novel infectious coronavirus (COVID-19) continues to threaten public health and safety, and remains a statewide emergency under ORS 401.025. Accordingly, I am extending the state of emergency for an additional 60 days, through July 6, 2020. Executive Order 20-03 shall remain in effect through July 6, 2020, unless extended or terminated earlier by the Governor. 
 
Done at Salem, Oregon, this 1st day of May, 2020. 


A state of emergency is not a shutdown. The Oregon shutdown is starting to lift on May 15, as has been covered in this thread. 
 

Bad info by a few posters on this so don’t feel like you’re alone. 

Edited by shoshin
Posted
2 minutes ago, shoshin said:


A state of emergency is not a shutdown. The Oregon shutdown is starting to lift on May 15, as has been covered in this thread. 
 

Bad info by a few posters on this so don’t feel like you’re alone. 

AFL Guy was not alone today. He had a get together BBQ with his family and he graciously invited me. The steak and lobster was delicious but the wine was a little too sweet.  I only have myself to blame for that. When I asked if i could bring something he told me not to and I listened to him. I usually bring a bottle or two of wine just to prevent that kind of a situation. Anyway it was a fine time and I feel honored to have attended his first weekly PPP BBQ. 

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Posted
59 minutes ago, Koko78 said:

 

I've never seen a man who is more clearly a White Supremacist than that dude.

 

White guys with guns = racists, bullies, Nazis. Duh.

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