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Posted
12 hours ago, BobDVA said:

Non sarcastic version!

 

Lawson and Murphy will combine for 15+ sacks.

 

Jones will have 75 reception, 900 yards, 8 TD

 

I lol’d.

 

They suck. Bad.

Posted

1) New Era Stadium plays the theme Song from the Golden Girls every time Shady or Gore score a touchdown. 

 

2) Coach McD changes from clapping to jazz hands. It catches on and replaces the high five league wide.

 

3) Tom Brady is caught writing off visits to a male prostitute as a Nutritional Consultant. Video emerges of him eating ice cream off the body of the young man. Sports Illustrated notes the Tom simultaneously cheated on his wife, his taxes and his diet, then immediately declares Brady its Sportsperson of the Year.

 

4) The Buffalo Bills win the Super Bowl 45-16 over the LA Rams. Businesses, Schools and non essential Government offices are closed for three days. Supplies of beer and liquor are rerouted from Cleveland and Pittsburgh as local inventories are quickly depleted. The Parade makes St Patty's day look like an AA meeting. Two national reporters doing stand up shots along the planned route are never heard from again. Raucous fans cause the parade to reroute onto the 290/190 beltway and the parade itself circles the city for 36 hours. A February Toga party breaks out in the Chippewa district. A group calling itself The Sons of Labatt's issues a Declaration of Independence from New York State, The United States, The United Nations and The Planet Earth. It is not clear what area they are declaring as independent. In a follow up, they issue "The Bills of Rights". Items listed include alcohol will be available for sale before 8 AM on Sundays and Tom Brady cheats. 

 

As February gives way to March, both Governor Cuomo and President Trump refuse to send in The National Guard. Local Units of the Guard have taken up positions blocking the Thruway. When approached, the simply grab their crotches and shout, "We've got your #$@^@%%^ tolls right here!" and hurl empty beer cans at anyone within range. Boats carrying liquor and beer are seen frequently offloading at docks all along the lake front in what becomes known by the National Media as "the Buffalo Boat Lift". 

 

By April, internet connections with the Buffalo Area have been cut. The Federal Government reports that tax receipts from the area are down by 97% over the previous year, although they have received over 2,500 Josh Allen rookie cards. During the broadcast of the 2020 NFL draft, there are no Bills representatives seen until 8 seconds remaining on the clock to make the 32nd pick in the draft, Brandon Beane strides across the stage. He has a two month beard and one eyebrow shaved. He's wearing only a kilt and moon boots and drinking something obscured by a paper bag. He sets the bag down on the podium and gives a Roger Goodell a nuggie. He then approaches the microphone and says, "With the 32nd pick in the 2020 NFL draft, The WORLD CHAMPION BUFFALO BILLS SELECT JACK DANIELS,  WHISKEY, TENNESSEE."

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Posted
1 hour ago, McBean said:

 

I lol’d.

 

They suck. Bad.

with that, I shall quote DC Tom "You're an Idiot"

Posted
1 hour ago, ocemur said:

1) New Era Stadium plays the theme Song from the Golden Girls every time Shady or Gore score a touchdown.

Social activists are outraged at this apparent act of ‘ageism’.  Bills fans over the age of 50 have no clue as to the reason for the umbrage.

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Posted
18 hours ago, OldTimeAFLGuy said:

....New Era replaces Shout song with Kate Smith's "God Bless America" wearin' a bag over her head.......

I'd rather it be Katy Perry 

 

I kissed a girl and I liked it   

With a taste of her cherry chap stick

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Posted

2nd bold prediction: Tyree Jackson will go much earlier than mock drafts project him. Probably early Day 2 pick - but would not be surprised if he goes late in the first as well. Teams appear to be drooling over Josh Allen comparisons.

Posted
On 4/20/2019 at 10:03 PM, BobDVA said:

Non sarcastic version!

 

Lawson and Murphy will combine for 15+ sacks.

 

Jones will have 75 reception, 900 yards, 8 TD

I thought you were talking about Julio Jones for a moment and I was like yeah that is a bold prediction.

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