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OK, so I’m out for a walk with my best pal on a hot summer day, and we stop in to this pub for some refreshments (Rufus loves Molson...jumps up, puts his paws on the bar and hollars, “Woof!”)

 

There’s a big sign above the bar, “No Dogs Allowed”

 

Bartender sez, “Buddy, can’t you read?” 

 

I plead, “This ain’t no ordinary dog - he’s a talking dog...”

 

Beertender sez, “Come on, buddy...”

 

I say, “I’ll prove it... Rufus, what’s that on top of our house?”

 

He yells,  “Wooof”

 

“See?  He just said ‘roof’!”

 

”Try again, pal...”

 

”OK, Rufus, when you put your paw on sandpaper, how does it feel?”

 

”Woof!”

 

”See? He just said ‘rough’!”

 

”Pal, you’re outa here...”

 

”No no, Rufus, who’s the greatest baseball player ever?”

 

”Wooof!!!”

 

”See?  He just said ‘Ruth!”

 

 

So, we’re walking home, after being tossed out, and Rufus looks at me and sez,

 

”Maybe I shoulda said DiMaggio?”

 

 

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Posted
23 minutes ago, The Senator said:

 

OK, so I’m out for a walk with my best pal on a hot summer day, and we stop in to this pub for some refreshments (Rufus loves Molson...jumps up, puts his paws on the bar and hollars, “Woof!”)

 

There’s a big sign above the bar, “No Dogs Allowed”

 

Bartender sez, “Buddy, can’t you read?” 

 

I plead, “This ain’t no ordinary dog - he’s a talking dog...”

 

Beertender sez, “Come on, buddy...”

 

I say, “I’ll prove it... Rufus, what’s that on top of our house?”

 

He yells,  “Wooof”

 

“See?  He just said ‘roof’!”

 

”Try again, pal...”

 

”OK, Rufus, when you put your paw on sandpaper, how does it feel?”

 

”Woof!”

 

”See? He just said ‘rough’!”

 

”Pal, you’re outa here...”

 

”No no, Rufus, who’s the greatest baseball player ever?”

 

”Wooof!!!”

 

”See?  He just said ‘Ruth!”

 

 

So, we’re walking home, after being tossed out, and Rufus looks at me and sez,

 

”Maybe I shoulda said DiMaggio?”

 

 

Sounds like Vito's barbershop talk..I like it.

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Posted (edited)

Don’t worry, you don’t need to speak German in order to appreciate this sketch—”Loriot” did a sketch show similar to SNL or MadTV. This one translates to, “The Picture is Hanging Crooked”

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by NoHuddleKelly12
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