Derek Anderson, Matt Barkley and Nate Peterman walk into a bar....

[GETTOTHE50]

a nice mead 

[1st Ammendment NoMas]

...the bartender says “What can I get you fellas?”   Derek Anderson replies, “I need a Mind Eraser”. The bartender makes one. DA sips it, bang his head off the bar and passes out.  

 

Matt Barkley looks at DA and laughs,  "Make me an Alabama Slammer.” The bartender shrugs, then leaps over the bar and sacks Matt to the ground yelling, "Roll Tide! Bills are 7 point dogs with you starting against 'Bama."

Nate Peterman looks at the 2 QB's on the ground,  panics, takes a $20 bill out of his pocket and dances around the barstool waving the money yelling, "Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary!”  The bartender pours vodka into a glass, then unblocked, he punches Peterman in the nose letting his blood drip into the drink. The $20 flies out of Peterman's hand and is intercepted. 

 

It's none other than Tyrod Taylor with the pick-20.  He takes Peterman's seat and places the $20 on the bar saying,  "Thanks Rex, now maybe we can get back to the playoffs. Make me a Slow Comfortable Screw  in honor of the Chargers game." 

"Not so fast Tuh-rod" is heard from the back of the bar, as a confident Josh Allen zips darts into the bullseye amidst cheering fans. Allen sprints toward the bar, cutting on a dime through DA and Barkley. He leaps over Peterman soaring to pick up the $20.  But he comes down awkwardly and bangs his elbow off the bar. Allen falls to the ground screaming in pain. 

Rex laughs and hands Tuhrod the drink saying, "I didn't draft him."  

McDermott waddles out of the bar bathroom doing the penguin with his pants half down, toilet paper stuck to his shoe and his fingers covered in crap. He scans the mess of QB's littered across the bar room floor, looks up at Rex and says, "Trust the Process."

Edited November 10, 2018 by BillsRdue

[Doc Brown]

A competent bartender that can remember more than one drink order at a time.

[YodaMan79]

I see them walk in, the first thing I do is look to my phone to see if the the defense apposing any one of them is available on the waiver wire in my fantasy league.  Pick 6, BABY!!!

[Fixxxer]

"some talent please, with arm strength on the side"

[dubs]

15 hours ago, BringBackFergy said:

...the bartender says “What can I get you fellas?”   Derek Anderson says “I’ll have a Mind Eraser”. The bartender makes one and DA sips it and passes out. Matt Barkley says “I’ll have a shot and a beer”. The bartender serves him and Barkley drinks it and looks confused. Nate Peterman says “Bartender....I’ll have a.......” (fill in the blank/end joke)

 

Hardy har har....

 

Real Polish knee slapped here....?

Edited November 10, 2018 by dubs

[stuvian]

Peterman says I'll have a Shirley Temple with a Hawaiian Punch spritzer chaser. He shoots his credit card across the bar where it bounces off the beer tap and falls down the drain

[The Process]

14 hours ago, Binghamton Beast said:

Peterman says, “I’ll have a draft beer. What do you have?”

 

The bartender says, “ we have 6 to pick from........”

hahahahahahahahaha  brilliant!

99 bottles of beer on the wall.... 99 bottles of beer.....take one down, pass it around......oops intercepted by an opposing fan!

[PS 56]

Peterman says "I'll Pass."  

[BringBackFergy]

9 hours ago, mrags said:

I thought you were better than this Fergy 

 

im very disappointed in you. Not mad. Just disappointed. 

I am extremely disappointed that you never save me any food at tailgates. 

[Gugny]

Peterman:  "I'll have the blood of Christ ..."

 

Suddenly, McClapster comes from nowhere and says, "Not if I get it first, choirboy!"

[Steve O]

 Bartender says get the @#$% out of here. (helps if you've seen Gran Torino)

Edited November 10, 2018 by Steve O

[mrags]

1 hour ago, BringBackFergy said:

I am extremely disappointed that you never save me any food at tailgates. 

I always save you food and try and shove it down your throat and you still refuse at times. It’s almost like your trying to tell me that you don’t like my cooking. 

 

Btw, How did you manage to manage to get gas with that rubber glove stuck in your gas door anyway? 

[Warcodered]

And Peterman says I'll have an application.

[PrimeTime101]

18 hours ago, BringBackFergy said:

...the bartender says “What can I get you fellas?”   Derek Anderson says “I’ll have a Mind Eraser”. The bartender makes one and DA sips it and passes out. Matt Barkley says “I’ll have a shot and a beer”. The bartender serves him and Barkley drinks it and looks confused. Nate Peterman says “Bartender....I’ll have a Firecracker!”

 For those that don't know what a fire cracker is, its a kids drink Sprite, Blue Gatorade and Cranberry juice. and to boot they used this drink for kids at SB 51

 

Edited November 10, 2018 by PrimeTime101

[nedboy7]

dont you mean they walk into an unemployment office? 

[Gunsgoodtime]

I will have some water, alcohol is sinful

[Ridgewaycynic2013]

9 hours ago, BuffaloButt said:

Peterman says to the bartender i'll have a six pick of beer!

Nah...your first one was better.  Like they told Constanza, always leave on a high note.

2 hours ago, Gugny said:

Peterman:  "I'll have the blood of Christ ..."

 

Suddenly, McClapster comes from nowhere and says, "Not if I get it first, choirboy!"

Good lord, that's cold.  You haven't been the same since that brief soirée with the 'bobble head Chad Kelly' avatar.  

[Hebert19]

I'm driving so I will just have a coffee and a turnover. 

[cba fan]

Peterman says: I'll have a bloody hail mary.