Chef Jim Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 (edited) I lost my dad this week. And no I don't need any advice. I've already looked behind the couch. In lieu of prayers and sympathy please add your favorite anecdote about your dad. I'll start As most of you know my dad was an avid skier. Skied pretty much every day during the season right up until last winter at the age of 89. He told me a story a few years ago. He was riding the lift at Holiday Valley where he'd skied for over 50 years (hell I started there nearly 50 years ago myself). It was him and a couple on the lift. They were making small talk and they asked if he was local. He said yes he lived right there in Ellicottville however he told them he spent 35 years in Attica. He said they both scooted over in the chair away from him. And with a mafia mug like this you can understand their concern. Edited November 1, 2018 by Chef Jim 1 10 2
Gavin in Va Beach Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 Condolences Jim. Sounds like he had a well lived life.
WhoTom Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 Sorry for your loss, Jim. My late father was a "dad joke" kind of guy, which helps explain my goofy sense of humor. Once, when ordering pizza at a restaurant, the waitress asked if we wanted the pizza cut into eight slices or twelve. Dad replied, "Eight, please. We're not hungry enough to eat twelve." 3
Guffalo Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 Sorry for your loss Jim, losing a parent sucks. As per your request, Years ago, while skiing, my Dad took a pretty bad fall, landing on his chest, with the pole grip against his chest. Good bruise, really stunned him. He said right then and there, "I'm done" In reality I think he realized that his kids were now better than he was and he was trying to keep up and thats what caused his crash. Anyway, the next day the whole family gets in the car to go back to the slopes for another day and Dad is in his gear, but didnt bring any skiis or poles, just his boots. I figured he would go back and get them after we were all booted up and out on the slopes. Every once in a while we would stop and he would be in the lodge, in his gear just checking out the snow bunnies (in the 70's they all wore the tight suits/pants). For the rest of the season he folowed the same plan, gear on, looking the part, just chatting up snow bunnies while we all skied. 1
Chef Jim Posted November 1, 2018 Author Posted November 1, 2018 7 minutes ago, Guffalo said: Sorry for your loss Jim, losing a parent sucks. As per your request, Years ago, while skiing, my Dad took a pretty bad fall, landing on his chest, with the pole grip against his chest. Good bruise, really stunned him. He said right then and there, "I'm done" In reality I think he realized that his kids were now better than he was and he was trying to keep up and thats what caused his crash. Anyway, the next day the whole family gets in the car to go back to the slopes for another day and Dad is in his gear, but didnt bring any skiis or poles, just his boots. I figured he would go back and get them after we were all booted up and out on the slopes. Every once in a while we would stop and he would be in the lodge, in his gear just checking out the snow bunnies (in the 70's they all wore the tight suits/pants). For the rest of the season he folowed the same plan, gear on, looking the part, just chatting up snow bunnies while we all skied. I have five siblings. Of course we all skied but I was the only one that kept up with it while the others dropped out. 70's snow bunnies had a lot to do with me keeping it up.
plenzmd1 Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 Condolences Jim..sucks when you lose your father/friend. My dad was a kind , kind, soul who always put the other guys needs first. One of the funniest things I remember about my pops was at an early swim meet of mine in the 70's ...travel meet for the YMCA State Championships. I must have been 10 or so, he was mid 50's(which was old back then) . Streaking craze was on...the younger fathers got him all jacked up about being old as they were drinking and talking smack ...so he went streaking across the hotel lobby/ bar area to prove he was still "with it". Thought for sure my Moms was gonna divorce him right there and then! He was born in 1919, he was always weird about jeans too...never ever wore them. To him, people "on relief" wore jeans. he was not gunna let people think he was on the relief!!!! And we always had enough money, not a alot, but never went hungry either..he was just worried people would think we poor !!!! 1 2
row_33 Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 At 7, the first time I got hit full square in the face with a hard-kicked soccer ball I cried and cried, they stopped the game. My Dad stood there patiently on the sidelines, not really his usual thing, and afterwards said it was like a punch in the face, it's something you don't want and it hurts a bit but shrug it off and keep going. Two weeks later I took another to the face and kept on player without a peep. Teammates later told me they were impressed by taking it like that. RIP for your father, I still have mine as he's in his mid-70s and doing fine, better than me.
Ridgewaycynic2013 Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 (edited) In the 1950s and 60s, my dad and his brother in law did their best to have a beer (or 3 or 4) in every gin mill in WNY. By late 2001, my dad was slowly wasting away from various cancers in Florida. He kept surprising doctors and family members with his continued existence. Suddenly, the same brother in law passed here in Buffalo, totally unexpected. Within three days my father passed away, probably not wanting to get too far behind on drinks rounds at St. Peter's Bar and Grill. With time, the good memories will always win out over the sadness of losing him, Jim. Edited November 1, 2018 by Ridgewaycynic2013 2
Marv's Neighbor Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 My Dad had to buy me an electric train for Christmas, I think '49, I would have been 2+ years old. So every year "Santa" would bring me the train, and when the tree came down, Santa picked it up for "next year" So the first train was a steam engine freight type. About 52-53 Lionel introduced a Diesel. My Dad have to get that for me. Same deal, Santa bought it, and it went away after the tree came down. As he was putting the new diesel train up, my Mom asked him, where the steam engine was? Dad had traded it in for the diesel, without my Mom knowing. Mom said NO WAY! Santa does not trade away a child's trains! So my Dad had to go back any buy the steam engine train back. Now I had two train sets, and that was fine with me. A couple of years later, I remarked that I thought a certain coal hopper used to be black, and now it was maroon red? Mom flashed dad a look, and several years later, I heard the "rest of the story." RIP to your Dad! All Dad's are special, and most people think theirs is the most special of all. 1
Patrick Duffy Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 Sorry for your loss. Be thankful (which I'm sure you are) that you had a good relationship with your father. Mine is scum. Condolences to you and your family.
Pine Barrens Mafia Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 Sorry for the loss of your father and a friend, Jim. God Bless you and your family.
Bill from NYC Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 I am very sorry to hear this. May God bless you and your loved ones and provide comfort during these times of sorrow.
plenzmd1 Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 19 minutes ago, Marv's Neighbor said: My Dad had to buy me an electric train for Christmas, I think '49, I would have been 2+ years old. So every year "Santa" would bring me the train, and when the tree came down, Santa picked it up for "next year" So the first train was a steam engine freight type. About 52-53 Lionel introduced a Diesel. My Dad have to get that for me. Same deal, Santa bought it, and it went away after the tree came down. As he was putting the new diesel train up, my Mom asked him, where the steam engine was? Dad had traded it in for the diesel, without my Mom knowing. Mom said NO WAY! Santa does not trade away a child's trains! So my Dad had to go back any buy the steam engine train back. Now I had two train sets, and that was fine with me. A couple of years later, I remarked that I thought a certain coal hopper used to be black, and now it was maroon red? Mom flashed dad a look, and several years later, I heard the "rest of the story." RIP to your Dad! All Dad's are special, and most people think theirs is the most special of all. this reminds of another funny story bout my Dad..he was as cheap as cheap could be. Until i was about 8..we were told Santa brought the tree with him. We would go to bed, then my Mom and Dad would decorate the tree..all in an effort to buy a cheap tree on Christmas Eve. Still makes me laugh what he did to save $10 1
bills_fan Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 My condolences Jim. May he RIP. Its terrific you had as much time as you did and that he was able to enjoy skiing until he was 89. Gives me hope that I enjoy it that long. Per your request... Year was 1996 and I had just turned 21. I went with my Dad when I was on home for break to a place I had never been...the old Boston Hotel in Boston, NY. On this particular night it was 99 cents a dozen for clams, oysters and other nibbles but we were there for the clams and oysters. We started with two dozen each of raw clams, raw oysters and steamed clams and ice cold pitcher of Labatts Blue. It was the first time I was drinking in a pub with my Dad. We were scarfing down plenty of clams and oysters and enjoying ice cold beer. This was great! We ended up polishing off 16 dozen total and washing it down with a couple pitchers. Was a terrific memory for me because it felt like we crossed a line...a very good line together.
ricojes Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 Sorry for your loss... This is my father's 39th year as a Bills season ticket holder. Just tailgated with him this past Monday night and I cherish every one of those!
RaoulDuke79 Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 Sorry for your loss. My father and I didn't have a good relationship. He was a troubled man who fought many deamons because of how he was brought up by his father. He was a very talented man mechanically. By my standards, I would say near genius level. He built our entire house from the ground up. Foundation, plumbing, electrical. There was literally nothing that he couldn't fix. In all my 18 years living under his roof we never had anyone come into the house to do any type of repair or maintenance. The only time any of our vehicles were taken to the mechanic was for state inspection. Everything else was done in our garage from body work to engine rebuilds. He fabricated trailers (welding, electrical, etc...)because a few of his buddies needed them. He was hardened man who was quick to anger and had a tough time showing love to those closest to him. He was never physically abusive, but I guess by today's standards he would be considered verbally abusive for sure. Again, I'm sure this is because of how he was raised. Because of that and his addiction we spent very little time together growing up, which I really look back upon with regret. There's so much more I could have learned. This is where the sad story ends. There were some good things that came of it. I became very self sufficient because I was afraid to go to him with questions. I became very attentive detail and a perfectionist in an effort to live up to his standards. Now that I'm older and have kids of my own, I'm aware of the things that I do or say that were similar to what he did and make an effort to get better. We have a lot of the same characteristics when I sit down and think about it. As the saying goes, "the sins of the father are passed down to the third and fourth generation". I'm doing what I can to make sure I'm the last one. 4
Gugny Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 I'm very sorry to read this news, Jim. Your dad was obviously a wonderful man and father. My parents were at a local drug store years ago. In the parking lot, getting ready to leave, the woman parked next to him left her cart in the parking lot and was about to get into her car. My dad, mid-70s at the time, rolled his window down and said, "shouldn't you put that cart away so it doesn't hit anyone's car?" The woman promptly came back with, "Oh, f**k you." My dad then said, "really nice ... do you eat with that mouth?" As he drove away, the woman flipped him off. He loves telling that story. He'll be 79 in December; mom is 74. When people ask them how long they've been married, or if they comment on what a cute couple they are, his response always contains, "we're actually trying to have one more child." Gets a hearty laugh every time. 1 1
BringBackFergy Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 Very sorry Jim. As has been said, the stories your Dad told you throughout your life will always bring a smile to your face....especially those of a bar/restaurant owner. Those have to be great memories.
JÂy RÛßeÒ Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 My Dad, who passed in '90 but was a true Bills fan since we arrived in Buffalo in '66, coined a phrase I still use today: "Kick the field goal, boys"
outsidethebox Posted November 1, 2018 Posted November 1, 2018 So sorry for your loss Chef. May he rest in peace. I didn't know my father, but my father in law was a dad to me. He passed away a few years ago. He came down with polio at 6 months and lost the use of his legs and most of his left side. But that never stopped him from becoming the best auto mechanic I've ever met. He never went to school due to his handicap but he was smart as a whip and I loved him like a father. Once again, my condolences Jim.
Recommended Posts