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Posted
4 hours ago, Johnny Hammersticks said:

48 and a grandma.  That’s never ideal.

Maybe.

 

Having children @  24 years old is not ideal?  My Mother already had 3 by then.  By 30, four of us.

 

Yet... I was 30/34 when My Children were born.

 

There is a part of Me that does say... We treat Children like adults way too late.  My nephew is 30 years old and My 54 year old brother defends (His bad behavior: drinking & getting high) that He is still a "kid."

 

We need to go back to a time when being a adult revered.  Now being a kid is revered.  Nobody wants to grow.  

 

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Posted
8 minutes ago, ExiledInIllinois said:

Maybe.

 

Having children @  24 years old is not ideal?  My Mother already had 3 by then.  By 30, four of us.

 

Yet... I was 30/34 when My Children were born.

 

There is a part of Me that does say... We treat Children like adults way too late.  My nephew is 30 years old and My 54 year old brother defends (His bad behavior: drinking & getting high) that He is still a "kid."

 

We need to go back to a time when being a adult revered.  Now being a kid is revered.  Nobody wants to grow.  

 

 

As much as I hate to say it, EII has a point.  Used to be if you were a grandparent before age 50 you and your child both did well; you were (generally) married, you were somewhat stable, you had the American dream!  Now having a kid before you're 28 is looked down on because you haven't done this that or the other.  Doesn't help that the folks having kids at young ages now are generally featured on Jerry Springer, Maury, and the like, perpetuating the myth that having kids early is necessarily a bad thing.

 

I have several friends that got married and had kids in their early 20s.  They're all successful, happy, and fulfilled.  They're what America was supposed to look like.

  • Thank you (+1) 2
Posted

you ever heard an infant uncontrollably cry?  the oven becomes an idea.  

 

 

in all honesty this broad is 7 years older than me and her grandkid is a year an a half older than my youngest.  concerning age and families, it just depends where people are in life and how mature they are.  i would have destroyed a family if i started early.  i didn't even get out of my post grad work until i was 27, so my family life was delayed a bit by choice.  i don't love having kids this late, but school and finances are no longer an issue.  i tend to find the guys who went right to work out of high school were the ones who were married early.  one guy went to work for his dad's enormous construction company, and is still happily married.  the other went into the military, and it was pretty disastrous.  i don't think age had much to do with that though.

Posted (edited)
15 minutes ago, LeviF91 said:

 

As much as I hate to say it, EII has a point.  Used to be if you were a grandparent before age 50 you and your child both did well; you were (generally) married, you were somewhat stable, you had the American dream!  Now having a kid before you're 28 is looked down on because you haven't done this that or the other.  Doesn't help that the folks having kids at young ages now are generally featured on Jerry Springer, Maury, and the like, perpetuating the myth that having kids early is necessarily a bad thing.

 

I have several friends that got married and had kids in their early 20s.  They're all successful, happy, and fulfilled.  They're what America was supposed to look like.

Yep!  Sorry for making You look bad Levi!  LoL

 

Last paragraph is exactly what I was angling at!  Thanx.

 

 

Edited by ExiledInIllinois
Posted
6 hours ago, ExiledInIllinois said:

Maybe.

 

Having children @  24 years old is not ideal?  My Mother already had 3 by then.  By 30, four of us.

 

Yet... I was 30/34 when My Children were born.

 

There is a part of Me that does say... We treat Children like adults way too late.  My nephew is 30 years old and My 54 year old brother defends (His bad behavior: drinking & getting high) that He is still a "kid."

 

We need to go back to a time when being a adult revered.  Now being a kid is revered.  Nobody wants to grow.  

 

Never had this problem when there was a Draft.

Posted
3 minutes ago, Marv's Neighbor said:

Never had this problem when there was a Draft.

Yeah... Society as a whole benefitted.  Yet, the Military managing soldiers that didn't want to be there set off a whole 'nother set of issues.

Posted
5 hours ago, teef said:

you ever heard an infant uncontrollably cry?  the oven becomes an idea.  

 

 

in all honesty this broad is 7 years older than me and her grandkid is a year an a half older than my youngest.  concerning age and families, it just depends where people are in life and how mature they are.  i would have destroyed a family if i started early.  i didn't even get out of my post grad work until i was 27, so my family life was delayed a bit by choice.  i don't love having kids this late, but school and finances are no longer an issue.  i tend to find the guys who went right to work out of high school were the ones who were married early.  one guy went to work for his dad's enormous construction company, and is still happily married.  the other went into the military, and it was pretty disastrous.  i don't think age had much to do with that though.

 

I’m in the same boat.  Finished my doctorate when I was 27, and my son was born when I was 30.  He is will be turning 9 this December, and I will be turning 40 in February.  If my son has a child in 7 years, something went way fugging wrong.

 

I know plenty of people who went to work right after HS and had kids.  I feel like some of them were successful and are still enjoying nice lives with their families, but most of them turned out to be scumbags.

 

If my son was graduating HS this year, I think I would advise him to avoid marriage/kids until his late 20’s/early 30’s.  He doesn’t have to go to college, but I would love for him to be able to enjoy his 20’s without any serious responsibilities/commitments.  Travel...get laid a lot...get arrested a couple times.  You know.  Enjoy life!

Posted
22 hours ago, Johnny Hammersticks said:

48 and a grandma.  That’s never ideal.

 

I have six kids 11 to 26 years old.

 

We started early, first child on my wife's 24th birthday.

 

Our second daughter gave us a grandchild before we were fifty.

 

My three oldest each own a house.

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Posted

I'm 40 wife is 43 and our daughter is 22 and about to graduate from FAU in December.  Son is a junior in high school.  I'm hoping not to be a grandparent for a few years but seems like it's gonna happen whether I want it to or not lol. 

Posted
On 10/17/2018 at 2:18 PM, teef said:

you ever heard an infant uncontrollably cry?  the oven becomes an idea.  

 

 

in all honesty this broad is 7 years older than me and her grandkid is a year an a half older than my youngest.  concerning age and families, it just depends where people are in life and how mature they are.  i would have destroyed a family if i started early.  i didn't even get out of my post grad work until i was 27, so my family life was delayed a bit by choice.  i don't love having kids this late, but school and finances are no longer an issue.  i tend to find the guys who went right to work out of high school were the ones who were married early.  one guy went to work for his dad's enormous construction company, and is still happily married.  the other went into the military, and it was pretty disastrous.  i don't think age had much to do with that though.

I would imagine education is a huge factor in terms of age when having children.

 

I lived for 12 years in Old Town, Alexandria, VA, in the DC metro area.  Affluent little community in one of the best educated enclaves in the country.  Couples in their 40s pushing around infants in baby strollers was a very common sight.  

 

Big cities are filled with career oriented people with lots of education and they often start families late.

 

 

Posted
20 minutes ago, RaoulDuke79 said:

I dont need to hear about ***** like this. There's really no need to report it aside from shock value. It serves no public interest. 

Yet, it gets Us off on tangential societal discussions!

Posted
22 minutes ago, RaoulDuke79 said:

I dont need to hear about ***** like this. There's really no need to report it aside from shock value. It serves no public interest. 

 

Oh yeah.  The charred baby in the oven with stab wounds....

 

Here’s a wild idea!  People should have to get a license to procreate.  Yeah, I said it!  They need to pass a FBI background check, satisfy certain mental health criteria, and they have to take parenting classes.  Lesson one...don’t stab your baby and put it in the oven.

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Posted (edited)
On ‎10‎/‎17‎/‎2018 at 2:06 PM, LeviF91 said:

 

As much as I hate to say it, EII has a point.  Used to be if you were a grandparent before age 50 you and your child both did well; you were (generally) married, you were somewhat stable, you had the American dream!  Now having a kid before you're 28 is looked down on because you haven't done this that or the other.  Doesn't help that the folks having kids at young ages now are generally featured on Jerry Springer, Maury, and the like, perpetuating the myth that having kids early is necessarily a bad thing.

 

I have several friends that got married and had kids in their early 20s.  They're all successful, happy, and fulfilled.  They're what America was supposed to look like.

 

Feminism changed this, in large part.

 

It was the raw economics surrounding the reality of doubling the work force (labor supply) without increasing demand for goods and services (there were the same amount of people).

 

A family used to be supported by a single income, but the doubling of the labor supply reduced wages, and eventually a two income family was required for most to achieve a middle class lifestyle.  Without a parent able to stay at home to actually raise a family, family planning was pushed back.

 

Couple that with a second economic change, the introduction of federal aid and subsidization of secondary education, and a culture demanding "college degrees for everyone" had the dual effect of prolonging the entry into professional life/adulthood  while simultaneously creating a massive new industry of educational debt service which sucks the financial capability out of many Americans until they're in their 30's, and voila.

 

There's your recipe for a delay in family rearing.

Edited by TakeYouToTasker
  • Like (+1) 1
Posted
54 minutes ago, Johnny Hammersticks said:

 

Oh yeah.  The charred baby in the oven with stab wounds....

 

Here’s a wild idea!  People should have to get a license to procreate.  Yeah, I said it!  They need to pass a FBI background check, satisfy certain mental health criteria, and they have to take parenting classes.  Lesson one...don’t stab your baby and put it in the oven.

For some people on their own perfect world where no crimes happen, ever, this is too much.

 

They also think terrible things like this happen once every 3-4 years. When In reality, terrible things like this happen almost every single day.

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