Anyone ever go through a divorce with a child?

[Royale with Cheese]

2 minutes ago, joesixpack said:

Oh, it was fine until she started dating again. It was after that point that she went back to child services and demanded an increase in support.

 

Twice.

 

She was ALL nice until she didn't have to be. Nicer than when we were married, even. That's the risk.

 

 

It sounds like Georgia is a more friendly Father state.  I know multiple people who have went through divorces here in Georgia and nothing seems at your level.

My wife doesn't even qualify for alimony even though I make a lot more than she does.

1 minute ago, MILFHUNTER#518 said:

So let me get this straight, you have to pay friggin 40% of your gross in alimony & support? On top of that, insurance and stuff? And insurance for her? And she makes almost twice as much of you gross?

 

I was thinking the same thing.  She basically ruined him.

[\GoBillsInDallas/]

3 hours ago, Royale with Cheese said:

Anyone ever go through a divorce with a child?

 

Why would you marry a child in the first place?

 

 

[The Poojer]

Perhaps he has aspirations of being the subject of one of your 'Would Ya" threads

 

1 minute ago, \GoBillsInDallas/ said:

 

Why would you marry a child in the first place?

 

 

[Royale with Cheese]

1 minute ago, \GoBillsInDallas/ said:

 

Why would you marry a child in the first place?

 

 

 

He told me he was 18.

[Pine Barrens Mafia]

15 minutes ago, MILFHUNTER#518 said:

So let me get this straight, you have to pay friggin 40% of your gross in alimony & support? On top of that, insurance and stuff? And insurance for her? And she makes almost twice as much of you gross?

 

Let's see if i can clarify. I did the calculations, and the state formulates a single child as having a 18% of combined income as the baseline child support number for the month. I pay 40% of that amount, plus 40% of any health insurance expenses. Net result is I'm paying about 33% of my gross pay per month in total support.

Here's the kicker. Each time she asked for an increase, it took three months to get a hearing. Each time they charged me BACK support for those three months, so that even though I'd paid on time, I was charged back support and put into arrears. That really pissed me off. I just now finished paying off that back support. So I'll get a few extra shekels in my pocket each month.

 

The system is AIDS towards fathers.

 

 

Edited September 19, 2018 by joesixpack

[The Poojer]

well well well....someone left out a bit of detail in the original story......

 

 

2 minutes ago, Royale with Cheese said:

 

He told me he was 18.

[MILFHUNTER#518]

1 minute ago, joesixpack said:

 

Let's see if i can clarify. I did the calculations, and the state formulates a single child as having a 23% of combined income as the baseline child support number for the month. I pay 40% of that amount, plus 40% of any health insurance expenses. Net result is I'm paying about 33% of my gross pay per month in total support.

Here's the kicker. Each time she asked for an increase, it took three months to get a hearing. Each time they charged me BACK support for those three months, so that even though I'd paid on time, I was charged back support and put into arrears. That really pissed me off.

 

Why are you the one paying is the question I have since she makes twice as much as you 

[row_33]

i've worked the books for a dozen asset divisions for matrimonial matters, a few times finding millions hidden away

 

the only practical advice i can give:

 

1)  you can never overpay a great lawyer, a useless one is worth less than nothing

 

2) assuming you want to do the right thing and pay your fair share (and more for the child), you cannot give up anything more than your legal requirements at the beginning of negotiations.  If you act like a nice guy and increase the bare minimum before negotiations then that will be ground zero for negotiations now, and you will get zero credit for being nice.

 

Good luck, I couldn't imagine going through this....

 

 

[Pine Barrens Mafia]

2 minutes ago, MILFHUNTER#518 said:

Why are you the one paying is the question I have since she makes twice as much as you 

I asked that question myself. And the lovely woman at CFS told me that's how it works, regardless of who earns what.

 

Hooray government.

Edit: and I was wrong on my initial calculation, it's 18% for a single kid if I did the math right.

 

 

Edited September 19, 2018 by joesixpack

[MILFHUNTER#518]

Just now, joesixpack said:

I asked that question myself. And the lovely woman at CFS told me that's how it works, regardless of who earns what.

 

Hooray government.

 

I hate to say this, but I think I have FINALLY found a state WORSE than NY. 

[row_33]

10 minutes ago, MILFHUNTER#518 said:

Why are you the one paying is the question I have since she makes twice as much as you 

 

All interested parties are going to provide for the raising of a child

 

I had a friend who was booted out of a very rich family, he had to pay heavily, for which the ex used his monthly cheques to hire a detective agency to bother him for an entire year, vans surveiling his home and the like.  She would sign over his cheques third party to the agency just to !@#$ him up even more

 

[boyst]

My girlfriend was not married to her ex. It was amicable until I showed up. They have a 3 yr old. It's been hell on her; he's making it a nightmare.

 

But, we have learned a lot about the entire system and her attorney is great.

 

Edit: the child is being manipulated and used by the ex bf.  One thing I can't stress enough is looking for a family psychologist/counselor to gauge your kiddos. It won't have to be a long term deal, maybe a few sessions every couple.months.  it was my idea for her to take their kid to counseling and it has helped her see ways to deal with his questions, statements and other things.  Asking the wrong questions, saying the wrong reaction, or any such oddity will happen. This kid has said some silly things since all of this has been going down unsolicited which means it has affected him even if not fully noticable.

 

If you need to chat, text me or PM me. I'm sorry you're going through this.  

 

If you want a ray of hope:

My brother and his wife divorced for $300. Both paid $150 for fees.  He kept the house and they divided the money paid in to it to pay her a lump s ($220k).  Now he assumes all payments for the house.  Insurance is through her for the kids, it's much better on her end as she is a federal employee.  They are still friends and we still go see the entire side of her family for Thanksgiving often.  The big kicker is that they can't change school districts until the kids graduate elementary school because they're top notch schools. 

 

For 3 years it's been great for them

 

Edited September 19, 2018 by Boyst62

[Pine Barrens Mafia]

1 minute ago, MILFHUNTER#518 said:

I hate to say this, but I think I have FINALLY found a state WORSE than NY. 

 

Yeah it's AIDS.

 

But the joke's gonna be on the ex, when she comes looking for college money for the kid.

 

GUFFAW.

 

25 minutes ago, Royale with Cheese said:

 

It sounds like Georgia is a more friendly Father state.  I know multiple people who have went through divorces here in Georgia and nothing seems at your level.

My wife doesn't even qualify for alimony even though I make a lot more than she does.

 

For your sake, I hope so. I wish you luck, brother. Hope she never flips the switch and becomes a witch.

 

[boyst]

1 hour ago, Royale with Cheese said:

 

I don't want another relationship for a very long time.  I just need another divorced mom who doesn't want that either and we can give each other what we need and that's it.

 

Georgia

I met 3 women when I visited Atlanta from Tinder that I can pass along to you.

[Royale with Cheese]

1 minute ago, Boyst62 said:

I met 3 women when I visited Atlanta from Tinder that I can pass along to you.

 

Is the right response for this "yummy"?

[mead107]

Very. Sad 

Sorry you lost the love for each other that you Once had for each other.   

 

Good luck. 

[Soda Popinski]

When my daughter started calling her biological father "mr Brad" and referring to me as her daddy, things did not go well.     guy was an addict and an overall POS of a human being.  He told her (2 at the time) he was going to punch my lights out and make me bloody.  When she relayed the message she said "don't worry daddy i'll protect you" I just about died.   Then he saw me in person and.....there were no more threats, at least none expressed to her.  Not that i'm a super intimidating guy I just think people talk mad #*$! until something becomes real.   

 

18 months later after an ordeal we are not going to get into we decided she wasn't going to see him anymore.   That was 1999.  She graduates from FAU in December.  

 

Don't be that guy. 

[Pine Barrens Mafia]

2 minutes ago, Soda Popinski said:

Don't be that guy. 

 

But at the same time if  you're a decent guy, don't let your kid's mother dictate the terms of when you can see your kid, and do not cave in to demands for "flexibility."

 

[Soda Popinski]

Just now, joesixpack said:

 

But at the same time if  you're a decent guy, don't let your kid's mother dictate the terms of when you can see your kid, and do not cave in to demands for "flexibility."

 

That is exactly why he should go to court now with his lawyer and get errthing spelled out in writing and agreed to.   

 

It's not for the divorce. it's for the kid

I almost forgot there is a trap waiting to be sprung you have to be careful of.    When one of her friends sends that playful message on FB or IG or through text and tries for the "now that you're single" hookup......IT"S A TRAP!!!!!!!!!!

[Another Fan]

2 hours ago, RaoulDuke79 said:

Also, with the who push for "equality" for women and such, when are these bull **** divorce settlements going to change, where the husband gets screwed over time and time again and has to give up half of everything he's worked for.

It’s hard to be a regular guy these days