shrader Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 Hopefully me marries that girl some day. It'll make for some entertaining conversations after the engagement. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
row_33 Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 Never had kids, that might have caused me an 18th nervous breakdown Lots of things I've had to go through that would cause you one though.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teef Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 On 7/14/2018 at 8:29 AM, Royale with Cheese said: After work Friday, my wife and I took my 3 year old to Chick Fil A as a reward for not having any accidents that week at school. He’s potty training right now so it was kinda a big deal. Anyway, he’s playing on the playground with a few other kids. He goes down the slide and when he gets to the bottom, he says “uh oh”. I see a brown streak running down his leg. He has diarrhea and when he went down the slide, he spread the “liquid” down the tunnel. About a 5 year old girl slides down right after him. When she gets to the bottom, her back and back of hair is covered. I was mortified. Other kids notice and tell their parents. My wife grabs up my son, takes him to the bathroom. The other mother with the daughter covered in fecal matter, heads to the bathroom too. She’s washing her hair in the sink cursing up a storm. My wife is so embarrassed, she stays in the stall until that mother leaves....which took like 15-20 minuets. I was waiting outside of the bathroom waiting for my wife to finish cleaning and leave. I find out listening to the other parents talking about the incident....it was that girls birthday. On her birthday, she slid down a slide of ****. it's not as amazing as this story, but this past friday, my two month old **** all over the pediatrician. he was there for a check, diaper was off, and it rocketed on out. it was shocking how she quickly she dogged it. the wall took the brunt of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Royale with Cheese Posted July 16, 2018 Author Share Posted July 16, 2018 2 minutes ago, row_33 said: Never had kids, that might have caused me an 18th nervous breakdown Lots of things I've had to go through that would cause you one though.... Kids definitely change your life. You worry constantly. Just like Ray Romano said in the movie The Big Sick...."it really sucks when you love someone so much". If you haven't seen it, Ray's daughter in the film has an unknown infection that put her in a coma. 1 minute ago, teef said: it's not as amazing as this story, but this past friday, my two month old **** all over the pediatrician. he was there for a check, diaper was off, and it rocketed on out. it was shocking how she quickly she dogged it. the wall took the brunt of it. Did you at least by the Pediatrician a drink after? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teef Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 On 7/14/2018 at 10:38 PM, apuszczalowski said: Not poop, but when I was a really young, my mom took me to McDonalds for lunch while we were out, as we are walking out to the car, my stomach didn't feel right and I just started puking in the parking lot Best part was it was in the path of the drivethru, right in view as cars would pull up to the window to wait for their food. There was a car there with some people who saw it. They were more grossed out by the seagulls that then swooped down to "clean it up". You could hear the people in the car grossed out laughing at what they just saw...... When I was older, we went out for my sisters birthday to a chinese buffet. at teh time I used to be able to eat much more then I can now. I ate and was stuffed but decided to still get jello. as we walked out to the parking lot my stomach started telling me that there "wasn't always room for Jello" and I ran behind the dumpster. As I turned around to see my sister laughing, I also noticed the back door of the restaurant was open and an angry Chinese restaurant cook coming out to take the garbage out after witnessing what had happened..... So far I have been lucky and not had anything happen like this with my kids, yet.... i love public puking...especially when there's an audience. when we were teenagers, we got super high and went to the buffet at ponderosa. i stuffed myself to the point where i could barely move. we took a few steps outside, and i let loose a projectile vomit that went all over the sidewalk. it was right up against a row of windows, and i have to guess at least a dozen people saw it. 2 minutes ago, Royale with Cheese said: Did you at least by the Pediatrician a drink after? i didn't, but she is a handsome, middle aged woman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
row_33 Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 10 minutes ago, Royale with Cheese said: Kids definitely change your life. You worry constantly. Just like Ray Romano said in the movie The Big Sick...."it really sucks when you love someone so much". If you haven't seen it, Ray's daughter in the film has an unknown infection that put her in a coma. Did you at least by the Pediatrician a drink after? I vicariously suffer with family and friends and then can go home Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gugny Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 All I know is that if that was Shady's son, he would have gotten that ass WHOOPED! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Royale with Cheese Posted July 16, 2018 Author Share Posted July 16, 2018 13 minutes ago, teef said: i love public puking...especially when there's an audience. when we were teenagers, we got super high and went to the buffet at ponderosa. i stuffed myself to the point where i could barely move. we took a few steps outside, and i let loose a projectile vomit that went all over the sidewalk. it was right up against a row of windows, and i have to guess at least a dozen people saw it. i didn't, but she is a handsome, middle aged woman. You probably should have bought her something with fiber. Middle aged women like fiber....ask Jamie Lee Curtis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hapless Bills Fan Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 On 7/14/2018 at 7:36 AM, Royale with Cheese said: We couldn’t even keep his clothes, we wrapped those up with a plastic bag and threw them away. His entire shorts were soaked and the same with back of the shirt. We always carry an extra set of clothing for accidents. This is smart. My eldest niece has 5 kids and does not. One of her kids had a blow out while visiting and it got all over her husband's shirt as well as the toddler. I was able to get clothes for her kid from a neighbor who baby-sits her grandkids a couple days a week, niece never sent them back or a thank you note or anything. She's very religious, just assumes anyone who helps her is "God looking out for her" I guess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Royale with Cheese Posted July 16, 2018 Author Share Posted July 16, 2018 1 minute ago, Hapless Bills Fan said: This is smart. My eldest niece has 5 kids and does not. One of her kids had a blow out while visiting and it got all over her husband's shirt as well as the toddler. I was able to get clothes for her kid from a neighbor who baby-sits her grandkids a couple days a week, niece never sent them back or a thank you note or anything. She's very religious, just assumes anyone who helps her is "God looking out for her" I guess. My Aunt up in Buffalo is very religious as well and takes the same approach when it comes to borrowing money. She never pays anyone back because "God is looking out for her". She doesn't understand why people in the family don't see her as much....she owes everyone money. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hapless Bills Fan Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 On 7/14/2018 at 10:15 PM, LeGOATski said: What the hell. That's disgusting. Do the potty training at home, please. Only after your kid is fully trained do you let him out without a diaper. That way you're not literally ruining other people's day with your ****. That's really inconsiderate. The problem in this case doesn't sound like it was the pottytraining, it was uncontrollable runs. Judging by the state of some bathrooms I've seen, that does strike at all ages sometimes. 43 minutes ago, teef said: it's not as amazing as this story, but this past friday, my two month old **** all over the pediatrician. he was there for a check, diaper was off, and it rocketed on out. it was shocking how she quickly she dogged it. the wall took the brunt of it. Haha years back I worked in a pediatric ER, pediatric residents learn to dodge quickly! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Royale with Cheese Posted July 16, 2018 Author Share Posted July 16, 2018 1 minute ago, Hapless Bills Fan said: The problem in this case doesn't sound like it was the pottytraining, it was uncontrollable runs. Judging by the state of some bathrooms I've seen, that does strike at all ages sometimes. He was wearing this type of underwear. It's padded and absorbs, just not as much as a diaper so you have to change it pretty quickly after an accident. He's had #2 accidents in these and it held it fine when they're solid. It's the next step before regular underwear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cripple Creek Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 On 7/15/2018 at 12:06 AM, LeGOATski said: Just keep your ****ty reality away from my reality. Damn lady you sure are uptight. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soda Popinski Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 (edited) God I don't miss those blowouts. We always brought a change of clothes for my son, i used to tease the wife and say "it's his huge balls, it hits them and has no where to go but up his back." Edited July 16, 2018 by Soda Popinski Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeGOATski Posted July 16, 2018 Share Posted July 16, 2018 10 hours ago, Royale with Cheese said: He's not wearing regular underwear. He was wearing the padded underwear that absorbs, just not as much as diaper....it's for potty training periods. It wouldn't have mattered if he was in a full diaper, he had diarrhea and it was watery, not solid. If it was solid, there wouldn't have been a problem because it holds it in. He's had diarrhea with a full diaper and it still leaked. He had a stomach bug over the winter and he wore a full diaper the whole time. It would start leaking out in the leg areas and we had to clean the floor multiple times because it leaked out. There would literally be a puddle forming underneath him. You're basically saying that I shouldn't take my kid out in public because at any point....he could get sick. Sounds like you've had a ****ty time with potty training. Looks like I made an ass out of myself. My bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Royale with Cheese Posted July 17, 2018 Author Share Posted July 17, 2018 1 hour ago, LeGOATski said: Sounds like you've had a ****ty time with potty training. Looks like I made an ass out of myself. My bad. #1 he’s been pretty good with. #2 not so much. He’s just ashamed for some reason where he hides if he has to go. He was about 50/50 for a few weeks with tha diaper on. Then we got bold and took off the diaper and for 3 days, no accidents. That lead to CFA. Since Friday night, no accidents so I think he’s getting it. It’s cool man. I thought at the moment I did something inconsiderate but then my wife reminded me that it was the runs....he just couldn’t control it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buffalo716 Posted July 17, 2018 Share Posted July 17, 2018 What a crappy thread ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FearLess Price Posted July 17, 2018 Share Posted July 17, 2018 Yo im dead lmao good post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eball Posted July 17, 2018 Share Posted July 17, 2018 That is definitely graduation/engagement party material right there, my friend! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jauronimo Posted July 18, 2018 Share Posted July 18, 2018 On 7/14/2018 at 10:50 PM, LeGOATski said: Stop making excuses. People can successfully keep their **** out of other people's hair. It just takes time and consideration. Just because your kids have better sphincter control (for now) does not mean you're a better parent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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