Canadian Bills Fan Posted January 9, 2018 Posted January 9, 2018 Augie, I am so so so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my constant thoughts and prayers during this difficult time.
Another Fan Posted January 9, 2018 Posted January 9, 2018 On 1/6/2018 at 10:59 PM, Augie said: Thank you to everyone for your kind words and prayers. Obviously, this has been the most difficult period in my life. If we had gotten word in the middle of the night years ago that he had died, I would have been just as devastated, but less shocked. He has thrived in the past few years. This just goes to show the evil nature of addiction. Thinking you are doing better is a trap. I asked @Plenz to put out a post because I have a couple major points I want to share. (Thank you Paul! I was incapable at the time, and barely limping along now.) The first point is we need to learn to be open and talk about addiction. It’s everywhere! It is all around us, but people don’t like to talk about it. They feel a sense of shame, and want to sweep it under the rug so they don’t have to face the “stigma”. I can’t count the number of people who have reached out and said “thank you for being open about it”. We are NOT ashamed, in fact we are proud of how many families we have helped! Because we are open, we’ve had MANY families we barely know come to us seeking advice, or just someone to talk to who would not judge them. If it helps ONE person, it is worth it. Which leads to the second point I want to share. DO NOT JUDGE! You have NO idea what these individuals and families have been dealing with. We have gotten a flood of calls and messages from people who said “you know what, I’m hooked on coke and painkillers”. Or “I’ve been in recovery for 7 years, but I still struggle every day”. But these people only speak of it privately. There’s usually a story behind it. One guy is gay and single and lonely because everywhere he goes people are couples. His parents no longer approve of him. One young lady has never met her mother, who was raped when she was 12 by her brother’s 15 year old friend. THAT was how she was conceived. Her mother will promise to meet her in person, but has been a no-show countless times. The stories go on and on. Not that that is the only reason people get there, but YOU DON’T KNOW. It’s not an excuse, but it may be an explanation. Our son was abused at a young age in ways we were completely unaware of for many, many years. How we learned is too painful to share at this point. So, again, I thank all of you for your support. Michael was a great kid and a great person. I will love him forever! We tried to do a quiet little service in Nashville, but word got out. The funeral home had to bring in additional chairs four times, until they actually ran out of space and it was SRO with people out in other rooms. At the luncheon that followed the luncheon room overflowed and they had to open a ballroom! People loved this kid! You would have too! Michael worked as an admissions counselor at a mental health and addiction facility. My favorite guests were the people who said “I had to be here, he saved my life!” My message to them, and anyone else battling addiction is take care of yourself first. My son died because he tried to take care of everyone else, and forgot to take care of himself. Again, thank you for your thoughts and prayers. (Sorry it’s so long...only Nervous Guy usually gets subjected to that, but he’s a good sport! God bless Danny! ) It's easy to see why he was so liked if he took after his father. Thanks for sharing all that I know it wasn't easy, You guys are both inspirations 1 1
BringBackFergy Posted January 9, 2018 Posted January 9, 2018 God Bless you and your family Augie. Thanks for the update and reach out to any of us if you need anything.
Augie Posted January 9, 2018 Posted January 9, 2018 4 hours ago, Another Fan said: It's easy to see why he was so liked if he took after his father. Thanks for sharing all that I know it wasn't easy, You guys are both inspirations Actually, thanks for putting up with it. It is certainly difficult, but sharing it somehow helps. Thanks to everyone. 2
Augie Posted January 10, 2018 Posted January 10, 2018 (edited) We got this from our favorite priest (in one of my favorite places, Naples, FL). Please feel free to delete if this kind of thing isn’t appropriate. I thought it was touching and could be used in the future when someone loses a loved one. I hope you have no need to use it anytime soon. We seem to give Michael back to you, dear Lord. You gave him to us. But just as you did not lose him in giving, neither do we lose him in returning him to you. You do not give things in the way the world gives. What you give, you do not take away. You have taught us that what is yours is ours also, if we are yours. Life is eternal, Lord, and love is immortal, and death is only a horizon, and a horizon is nothing but the limits of our sight. Lift us up, strong Son of God, that we might see farther. Cleanse our eyes, that we may see more clearly. Draw us closer to you, O Lord, that we may find ourselves closer to our loved ones who are with you. And while you prepare a place for them, prepare us also for that heavenly place, where you are, and Michael is, and where we hope to be forever. Amen. Edited January 10, 2018 by Augie 2 1
Canadian Bills Fan Posted January 10, 2018 Posted January 10, 2018 12 hours ago, Augie said: We got this from our favorite priest (in one of my favorite places, Naples, FL). Please feel free to delete if this kind of thing isn’t appropriate. I thought it was touching and could be used in the future when someone loses a loved one. I hope you have no need to use it anytime soon. We seem to give Michael back to you, dear Lord. You gave him to us. But just as you did not lose him in giving, neither do we lose him in returning him to you. You do not give things in the way the world gives. What you give, you do not take away. You have taught us that what is yours is ours also, if we are yours. Life is eternal, Lord, and love is immortal, and death is only a horizon, and a horizon is nothing but the limits of our sight. Lift us up, strong Son of God, that we might see farther. Cleanse our eyes, that we may see more clearly. Draw us closer to you, O Lord, that we may find ourselves closer to our loved ones who are with you. And while you prepare a place for them, prepare us also for that heavenly place, where you are, and Michael is, and where we hope to be forever. Amen. That was beautiful Augie. Lovely words
row_33 Posted January 10, 2018 Posted January 10, 2018 thanks Augie, that's huge of you to put that up here, and appreciated.
rockpile Posted January 10, 2018 Posted January 10, 2018 Saying prayers for you and your family. People do not realize how widespread addiction is today or how incredibly high the impact is on us all God Bless.
Pine Barrens Mafia Posted January 10, 2018 Posted January 10, 2018 Augie man, you're good people. I'm sorry to hear about your loss.
Augie Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 (edited) Sorry, I don’t sleep much these days. I just realized the original post didn’t include the obit. He was not only kind and funny, but he was good looking and he benched north of 400 pounds. He came in third in the state of FLORIDA in the bench in high school. Did I mention he was funny? I wanted to include some stuff about how funny he was, but not sure if some of it is appropriate. http://marshall-donnelly-combs.tributes.com/dignitymemorial/obituary/Michael-Andrew-Nugent-105669349 Thank you to all of you for your kind thoughts. Edited January 11, 2018 by Augie 1
bbb Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 3 hours ago, Augie said: Sorry, I don’t sleep much these days. I just realized the original post didn’t include the obit. He was not only kind and funny, but he was good looking and he benched north of 400 pounds. He came in third in the state of FLORIDA in the bench in high school. Did I mention he was funny? I wanted to include some stuff about how funny he was, but not sure if some of it is appropriate. http://marshall-donnelly-combs.tributes.com/dignitymemorial/obituary/Michael-Andrew-Nugent-105669349 Thank you to all of you for your kind thoughts. You're a real good guy, Augie. Sorry this has happened. I hate what addiction does to the whole family. I'd love to hear some of the funny stuff.
Augie Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 7 hours ago, bbb said: You're a real good guy, Augie. Sorry this has happened. I hate what addiction does to the whole family. I'd love to hear some of the funny stuff. Michael could not have been more than 8 or 9 years old when we went to visit his grandmother. His little brother found a tricycle in the garage and they fought over who would get to ride it down the hill of the driveway first. Since Alex found the tricycle, I ruled that he got to go first. Alex jumped on, put his feet up and took off. The driveway was much steeper than I anticipated, and he started building up some serious speed. He was FLYING down the driveway. THEN he hit the crack in the concrete driveway I was unaware of. He literally flipped in the air, crashed to the ground and started skidding leaving a trail of flesh behind. Before Alex had stopped skidding, little Michael was hopping up and down with his hand waving in he air like he was in class and knew the answer. He was yelling “Ew! Ew! ME NEXT! ME NEXT!” He only got funnier as the years went on. And he had a smile to light up a room. 1
shrader Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 22 minutes ago, Augie said: Michael could not have been more than 8 or 9 years old when we went to visit his grandmother. His little brother found a tricycle in the garage and they fought over who would get to ride it down the hill of the driveway first. Since Alex found the tricycle, I ruled that he got to go first. Alex jumped on, put his feet up and took off. The driveway was much steeper than I anticipated, and he started building up some serious speed. He was FLYING down the driveway. THEN he hit the crack in the concrete driveway I was unaware of. He literally flipped in the air, crashed to the ground and started skidding leaving a trail of flesh behind. Before Alex had stopped skidding, little Michael was hopping up and down with his hand waving in he air like he was in class and knew the answer. He was yelling “Ew! Ew! ME NEXT! ME NEXT!” He only got funnier as the years went on. And he had a smile to light up a room. So did he get that next ride? 1
John from Riverside Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 I have a son this age....omg Augie...
Augie Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 1 hour ago, John from Hemet said: I have a son this age....omg Augie... About 10 years ago we started hugging him and telling him we loved him every time we parted ways. We didn’t know when it would be the last time we would see him, and just had to be sure that’s the last thing he heard from us. About 3 years ago he turned it around and recently it didn’t seem necessary, but we kept it up because....we liked it. It goes to show, take nothing for granted. Suffice it to say the straight arrow younger son is in on the hug-fest now. 2 1
Blokestradamus Posted January 12, 2018 Posted January 12, 2018 Augie, I'm so sorry for you and your family. We spoke about Michael and addiction a couple of years back and it was clear to see that he was loved so deeply. I wish you the strength to get through this and that you can recall all of the good that Michael brought into your lives. If you ever feel that you need to talk to somebody outside of your inner circle, I'll always be willing to listen.
Augie Posted January 12, 2018 Posted January 12, 2018 (edited) 1 hour ago, Blokestradamus said: Augie, I'm so sorry for you and your family. We spoke about Michael and addiction a couple of years back and it was clear to see that he was loved so deeply. I wish you the strength to get through this and that you can recall all of the good that Michael brought into your lives. If you ever feel that you need to talk to somebody outside of your inner circle, I'll always be willing to listen. Thanks Blokes. Yeah, it’s been a long, long ride. The thing we are so happy for and proud of are the last 3 years where he was doing so well. I don’t know if you caught this earlier, but he was extremely successful as an admissions counselor for a mental health and addiction network. He brought good into our lives, but also the lives of so many other families. Those three extra years for us are priceless! We tried to keep the service small with just close family and friends, but we outgrew the funeral home. We had a luncheon room that held 40-50 following. They had to open a ballroom because of the overflow. People said “I hope you don’t mind, I just had to be here because he saved my life.” Mind? That made my day! He touched more lives in his 28 years than I have in my 58 years. He showed me I have some work to do! Edited January 12, 2018 by Augie 2
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