Random Thoughts Thread

[Johnny Hammersticks]

2 minutes ago, ExiledInIllinois said:

Random thought too:

 

FAKE NEWS!

"Whoever said life is fair and easy." 

 

Stop doing cheesy things.  Trying way too hard.  Set Christmas off right, stick that damn Elf in middle of living, they will never expect in right under their noses and if they do?  Say: "So! Don't care!"  It works for him:

 

 

Easy for you to say old man.  Clearly, your children grew up long before the EOAS phase 

 

My wife and I forgot about the elf last Saturday night.  We stayed up late and had more than a few drinks.  You should have seen the panic in my bride’s eyes when she heard my daughter’s bedroom door open in the morning.  She gave her a good stiff arm back into her bedroom and ran downstairs to do something with the damned elf.  Hilarious.

[Pine Barrens Mafia]

On 12/13/2017 at 9:33 PM, /dev/null said:

Watched some of the Oak Island show and noticed the two guys are named Rick and Marty.  At which point every "dramatic" moment in the episode made me want to scream Wubbalubbadubdub!

 

Did the voice over guy say something like:

 

"What mysteries could lie beneath the beam? Ancient Alien theorists say dildos circa 1705"

 

[Nanker]

It takes a big dog to weigh a ton. 

[Johnny Hammersticks]

Here’s a random thought.  Are there “black” band-aids?  I mean, like for African Americans....I’ve never seen one.

 

If so, do they have different shades?  Surely a dark African straight from Somalia would have different band-aid needs than a guy like Tiger Woods.  Right?

[Nanker]

9 hours ago, Johnny Hammersticks said:

Here’s a random thought.  Are there “black” band-aids?  I mean, like for African Americans....I’ve never seen one.

 

If so, do they have different shades?  Surely a dark African straight from Somalia would have different band-aid needs than a guy like Tiger Woods.  Right?

 

Mos' def.

 

[RaoulDuke79]

Here's to 10 days off.....heyooooo. cheers mates :cheers:.....where the hell is the cheers emoji?

Edited December 22, 2017 by RaoulDuke79

[/dev/null]

Elf on the shelf

 

Still creepy

[RaoulDuke79]

40 minutes ago, /dev/null said:

Elf on the shelf

 

Still creepy

Only one more day of this pact.

[RaoulDuke79]

I don't like the new labels on Campbell's soup cans

[RaoulDuke79]

This O'Malley fellow in the UFC is set to be the next big thing.  Even has his own strain of weed evidently. 

[SlimShady'sSpaceForce]

On 12/16/2017 at 6:32 PM, RaoulDuke79 said:

Holy ****.....Dominos has carry out insurance on their pizza. Who does this?

Suckers 

On 12/22/2017 at 6:53 PM, RaoulDuke79 said:

Here's to 10 days off.....heyooooo. cheers mates :cheers:.....where the hell is the cheers emoji?

Lost in space.   

 

categories

emoticons

 

[Gugny]

Why is George Washington the only white Washington in American history?

[/dev/null]

Waiting for an offer letter for over a week now.  Every time I see a new email come thru I'm wondering if that's gonna be the one I'm waiting for.

[Gugny]

5 hours ago, /dev/null said:

Waiting for an offer letter for over a week now.  Every time I see a new email come thru I'm wondering if that's gonna be the one I'm waiting for.

 

Whatchya selling?

[Royale with Cheese]

7 hours ago, /dev/null said:

Waiting for an offer letter for over a week now.  Every time I see a new email come thru I'm wondering if that's gonna be the one I'm waiting for.

Did they make a verbal offer yet?

7 hours ago, Gugny said:

Why is George Washington the only white Washington in American history?

 

Do you know why Washington is a popular black last name?

 

Many enslaved blacks who served in the war didn’t have last names.  Since Washington was our Leader in the Revolutionary War...his name was a popular choice to use.

 

[/dev/null]

18 minutes ago, Royale with Cheese said:

Did they make a verbal offer yet?

I was told they would start a hiring action, but that the offer letter might be a couple weeks

[SlimShady'sSpaceForce]

24 minutes ago, /dev/null said:

I was told they would start a hiring action, but that the offer letter might be a couple weeks

If it’s been 2 weeks a phone call to them wouldn’t hurt. 

 

 

[CowgirlsFan]

Great chicken fried chicken tonight.

[Just Jack]

Couldn’t find the joke thread

 

A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.
The barman looks at him and says,
"Hang on! You're a duck."
"I see your eyes are working," replies the duck.
"And you can talk!" exclaims the barman.
"I see your ears are working, too,", says the duck.
"Now if you don't mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich please?"
"Certainly, sorry about that," ,says the barman as he pulls the duck's pint.
"It's just we don't get many ducks in this pub.. What are you doing round this way?"
"I'm working on the building site across the road,", explains the duck. "I'm a plasterer."
The flabbergasted barman cannot believe the duck and wants to learn more, but takes the hint when the duck pulls out a newspaper from his bag and proceeds to read it.
So, the duck reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich, bids the barman good day and leaves.
The same thing happens for two weeks.
Then one day the circus comes to town.
The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint and the barman says to him "You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer, eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!"
"Sounds marvelous,"says the ringmaster, handing over his business card. "Get him to give me a call."
So the next day when the duck comes into the pub the barman says, "Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying really good money."
"I'm always looking for the next job,", says the duck. "Where is it?"
"At the circus,", says the barman.
"The circus?", repeats the duck.
"That's right,", replies the barman.
"The circus?", the duck asks again. "with the big tent?"
"Yeah," the barman replies.
"With all the animals who live in cages, and performers who live in caravans?", says the duck.
"Of course," the barman replies.
"And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in the middle?" persists the duck.
"That's right!" says the barman.
The duck shakes his head in amazement, and says .. . .........
"What the f**k would they want with a plasterer??!"

[CowgirlsFan]

It's taco Tuesday.