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Posted

Your quarterback: Tyrod Taylor, who struggles to break 200 yards passing a game and yet is somehow the best QB this team has had in 987 years. If this guy’s last name had been FLUTIE, you !@#$s would have sold out his jersey a year and a half ago. Why, I simply can’t imagine why this fanbase wouldn’t fully embrace Tyrod and give him the support he could use to develop as a passer…

 

 

Nice.

Guest NeckBeard
Posted

They didn't post my rant. Oh well. Still, very, very funny, and delighted that the dildo made a curtain call. I had been hoping for that. I remember watching the game with a bunch of Pats' fans (I live in New England now), and we were all like, "wait, what just fell on the field?" before a bunch of parents started shielding their childrens' eyes. Good times.

Posted

My favorite submission (because it is nearly 100% accurate):

 

I begin every December seeing the 6-6 Bills at the bottom of the “IN THE HUNT” graphics and have repeatedly watched week 15 Ravens-Bengals games to root for the tie that’ll keep Buffalo’s 1% chance of making a wild card spot alive.


Most of these I find funny. The bills one I guess just sad and true. I could barely laugh cause it's all almost spot on

 

I think it's tougher to write the article when the team has made so many offseason changes. The digs at McD were pretty lame, as was the dig at Pegula. Overall it was still funny though.

Posted (edited)

"The Bills extreme sucking has resulted in my in-laws witnessing me rip a Tom Brady bedazzled bed sheet out of some children’s hands (they spent a long time making this) and throwing it dozens of rows away on a blustery day (Bills lost), scream at and possibly attempt to fight a loud Patriots fan, throw a cup of beer at a Patriots fan, tripping a Patriots fan, yell at a Dolphins fan to get the !@#$ out of Buffalo, tell the entire crowd at the Rogers Center (Bills vs. Falcons in Toronto) that they are “!@#$ing Canadian trash”, spill smuggled whiskey all over my crotch, pass out multiple times on living room floor after returning from the game, send vulgar and obscene text messages to the entire family as fourth quarter ends, and urinate in the corner of a parking lot, in a bush, out of a car, in a beer can, and their backyard.

Otherwise I’m pretty much a good-time guy. Go Bills!"

 

I'm dying.

Edited by NickelCity
Posted (edited)

I didn't like this one as much as last year's. Still pretty funny though.

 

As an aside: is anyone else tired of Magary shoving accusations of racism into every article that isn't about a coastal city team?

Edited by LeviF91
Guest NeckBeard
Posted

HEHEHEHE: "I travelled to London just to watch EJ Manuel lose all control of basic motor skills and metaphorically throw up all over his own dick against the Jacksonville Jaguars. I wanted to find their hotel and plant prostitutes made out of cocaine in his room so he wouldn’t be allowed to come back to America."

Posted

My favorite submission (because it is nearly 100% accurate):

 

I begin every December seeing the 6-6 Bills at the bottom of the “IN THE HUNT” graphics and have repeatedly watched week 15 Ravens-Bengals games to root for the tie that’ll keep Buffalo’s 1% chance of making a wild card spot alive.

 

I think it's tougher to write the article when the team has made so many offseason changes. The digs at McD were pretty lame, as was the dig at Pegula. Overall it was still funny though.

 

 

It's the annual dance of they have to win 5 of the last 6 and 42 other NFL games have to go the Bills way (10 of them would be upsets of incredible proportion)

 

a few years ago they were mathematically eliminated for the last game and a dozen threads on the BBMB proclaimed how they could get in with the right results week 17.

Guest NeckBeard
Posted

HEHEHEHE: "I travelled to London just to watch EJ Manuel lose all control of basic motor skills and metaphorically throw up all over his own dick against the Jacksonville Jaguars. I wanted to find their hotel and plant prostitutes made out of cocaine in his room so he wouldn’t be allowed to come back to America."

 

Not to be gratuitous and quote myself here, but apologies to anybody who was offended. I had thought the language filter would fixer a couple of the words shown above. Apparently not, and carry on.

Posted

They didn't post my rant. Oh well. Still, very, very funny, and delighted that the dildo made a curtain call. I had been hoping for that. I remember watching the game with a bunch of Pats' fans (I live in New England now), and we were all like, "wait, what just fell on the field?" before a bunch of parents started shielding their childrens' eyes. Good times.

Does anyone know who threw the dildo? It's the 1st game I ever went to in Buffalo lol

Posted

I didn't like this one as much as last year's. Still pretty funny though.

 

As an aside: is anyone else tired of Magary shoving accusations of racism into every article that isn't about a coastal city team?

I'm a WNY native and spent over a decade living in both New England and the South. By far, the most heinous, racist **** I've ever heard out of peoples' mouths has been in WNY. Maybe it gets thrown around too much as an accusation, but let's not pretend it doesn't exist.

Guest NeckBeard
Posted

Does anyone know who threw the dildo? It's the 1st game I ever went to in Buffalo lol

 

I can't take credit, and for that, I apologize to TBD once again.

Posted

Perhaps I'm biased, but the Bills one is almost always the best one. This was no exception. Bravo, Magary. The guy might look like he's missing a chromosome but he sure can write.

Posted

HEHEHEHE: "I travelled to London just to watch EJ Manuel lose all control of basic motor skills and metaphorically throw up all over his own dick against the Jacksonville Jaguars. I wanted to find their hotel and plant prostitutes made out of cocaine in his room so he wouldn’t be allowed to come back to America."

 

 

That was a good one lol

 

 

CBF

Posted

Coincides with me getting the Bill Simmons podcast on the 25 greatest wins of the Belichick Brady Era....

Posted

I'm a WNY native and spent over a decade living in both New England and the South. By far, the most heinous, racist **** I've ever heard out of peoples' mouths has been in WNY. Maybe it gets thrown around too much as an accusation, but let's not pretend it doesn't exist.

 

What he said.

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