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Posted

Twas the night before football season, when all through the house not a player was stirring not even at the Ralph, the jerseys were hung by the lockers with care, in hopes that Rex soon would be there; The fans were nestled all snug in their beds; while visions of touchdowns rushed in their heads; and Mama in her nighty, and I in my briefs, had just settled down for an end of summer roll in the sheets, when out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang to the occasion and oh boy did I "finish" the matter. Away to the tube I flew like a flash, making sure that I still had a good fantasy football draft. Picks one and two I only knew, that my picks were good through and through. When what to my wandering eyes did appear, Tyrod Taylor and the offense in high gear. With a chubby coordinator and speed roadsters in gear, I only knew Coach Roman must be here. More rapid than Tom Brady and his favorite boy toy, he whistled, he shouted, and called them with joy: "Now Shady, Now Goodwin and Taylor, On Sammy, On Woods, On Bush and Clay! To the top of the end zone to the top of them all! Now gain away, gain away , gain away all! And then in a whistle, I heard on the field, the hitting and tackling of the NFL shield. In distinct deminish, Brady ' s legacy is all but finished. Forever skewed is his game, a history tarnished in unsightly shame. Our time has come, this is our season, just wait and the Bills will win with reason. Vince Lombardi's trophy will meet a city leading to the falls and the rest of the country can suck Buffalo's big blue balls.

Posted

Nice. I didn't see this last night, but I woke up a couple hours ago and couldn't get back to sleep and had the same idea. Here's mine:

 

Twas the night before Billsmas and all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse

The Zubaz were hung by the tailgating gear

In hopes that the season soon would be there

And Tyrod was nestled all snug in his bed

While visions of Sammy danced in his head

But Dareus in his kerchief and Seantrel in his cap

Still have four games til they take their first snap

When out on the field there arose such a clatter

Goodwin sprang from his bed to see what was the matter

Away from the locker room he sprang like a Flash

Tore up the field, and caught a pass at the hash

Warren Moon threw a pick to Henry Jones

On the day of The Comeback all those years ago

When what to my Wondering eyes should appear

Driving a Taurus with dice in the mirror

The man from the statue, the legend himself

I knew right away it must be St. Ralph

And with the Pegulas, through the concourse they came

Whistling and shouting and calling by name

For Jimbo, for Thurman, for Andre, for Bruce

The Offensive Line must turn McCoy loose

And Up to the Press box that Taurus they flew

Murph was calling the game where Van Miller used to

And then to the stadium New Era came with a flash

For they have a name and boatloads of cash

And St. Ralph said to Rex, this I did hear

Your team better make the playoffs this year

As St. Ralph walked away and faded from sight

He cried Merry Billsmas to all, and to all a goodnight!

Posted

Thanks, good job Chandemonium. I like the references to players of past! I wrote mine two years ago with a couple of Octoberfest, I just have to "tweak" it annually for the current year's team.

 

This morning, I awoke next to my wife and said, "I've waited along time to say these three words to you."

 

As she stared back, I rubbed her cheek, and I whispered, "It's Football Season."

 

Smack! Go Bills :)

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