YoloinOhio Posted August 17, 2016 Author Posted August 17, 2016 Ha: I wonder if its more enjoyable to be a Buffalo Bills fan. I mean, they KNOW they suck and clearly the only purpose in going to a game is to get blackout drunk and perform some highly regrettable act that everyone on the internet can laugh at. The Colts give all these hapless-!@#$ fans a reason to think they can win (Andrew Luck) while there is no logical explanation as to how they could. With a GM who looks like he waltzed off the set of a Cinemax movie entitled Bikini Flag Football, that values first round picks like change I find under my seat, there is no possible way this team will win anything meaningful. But yet, these Trump supporting simpletons still trot out their Bob Sanders jerseys year after year perplexed as to why the Coats cant seem to win an important game. sad but true!
jimmy10 Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 (edited) The Falcons one is up now...this comment from a fan is absolutely perfect (I lived in Atlanta for several years before coming to my senses): Want to know the life cycle of the average Atlantan? Youre born in a ****ty suburb north of the city (Marietta, Alpharetta, Johns Creek, etc). You go to a state school like UGA, Alabama, Ole Miss, Auburn, etc. You graduate and work in PR or Sales and move to Buckhead. You go to the same bars for 3-5 years until you meet the perfect douchebro/blonde idiot. You get married before youre thirty, then move out to the suburbs to have some ****ty kids and start the cycle all over. Even better, the majority of people who say theyre from Atlanta are people who live in the suburbs and are afraid to go inside the perimeter (I-285 for you carpetbaggers) because the city is dangerous (read: Black). Other cities may have invented White Flight. But ATL made an art out of it. That profile of the typical suburban Atlanta dudebro is frighteningly accurate. I know at least 5-6 guys exactly like that. And am now questioning my life choices that led me to knowing 5-6 people like that. I wonder how long their edition of "Why Your Team Sucks" for the Bills has been in the can. I feel like all the developments of the last 72-96 hours would deserve a massive rewrite. Edited August 17, 2016 by jimmy10
Chilly Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 We're the last 8-8 team so we have to be tomorrow right?
jimmy10 Posted August 17, 2016 Posted August 17, 2016 We're the last 8-8 team so we have to be tomorrow right? Didn't know the exact count of 8-8 teams but figured we were up any day now. Can't wait. I enjoy laughing at myself, it's like a good roast.
YoloinOhio Posted August 18, 2016 Author Posted August 18, 2016 We should be next! We drafted right after Indy. Like I said, he could lift most of his material right off this board! Probably laughed himself silly writing it
sodbuster Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 The Detroit one made me feel a little bit better about myself.
The Wiz Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 We should be next! We drafted right after Indy. Like I said, he could lift most of his material right off this board! Probably laughed himself silly writing it Could just as easily read a Sully or Bucky piece.
QB Bills Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 It's tomorrow. Says so right at the end of today's piece. Get your popcorn ready. Magary's great at this stuff.
Bubba Gump Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 (edited) It's tomorrow. Says so right at the end of today's piece. Get your popcorn ready. Magary's great at this stuff. And it's going to be pure gold. Can't wait. Edited August 18, 2016 by Bubba Gump
Chilly Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 and it's live! http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2016-buffalo-bills-1785446085
YoloinOhio Posted August 18, 2016 Author Posted August 18, 2016 and it's live! http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2016-buffalo-bills-1785446085 ok gotta crack a beer for this one! Ahhhh "You know EJ will be back out there at some point. Youre destined to get a black QB like Tyrod hurt when you ask Richie Incognito to block for him."
FireChan Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 (edited) Nailed the Pegula era. Edited August 18, 2016 by FireChan
YoloinOhio Posted August 18, 2016 Author Posted August 18, 2016 (edited) Ok the story in the comments about Marrone's team in the movie theater is horrible and shows how a team emulates the personality of its HC - in how he treats people. He stayed behind to clean - ha! Phony gesture to try to make up for the team's behavior that was allowed by his staff. Jim Schwartz probably had the movie theater employee carry him from the door to his seat on his shoulders. Edited August 18, 2016 by YoloinOhio
Andrew Son Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 I love this fan comment- "We have no hope, yet every year the Buffalo sports media convinces us that THIS is the year we turn the corner." They do?
YoloinOhio Posted August 18, 2016 Author Posted August 18, 2016 I love this fan comment- "We have no hope, yet every year the Buffalo sports media convinces us that THIS is the year we turn the corner." They do? they must be only referring to Chris Brown and John Murphy
stevewin Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 The routine of the comedian (had to look him up Joe Pera?) in the comments was classic
eball Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 and it's live! http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2016-buffalo-bills-1785446085 Wow, I really, really wanted to laugh but besides the previously seen tailgating escapades I think it was the most poorly done (and unfunniest) of these so far.
stevewin Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 Wow, I really, really wanted to laugh but besides the previously seen tailgating escapades I think it was the most poorly done (and unfunniest) of these so far. I agree - think it might have been a case of just too much material to pull from - causing some sort of quasi snark/sarcasm writing paraysis
quinnearlysghost88 Posted August 18, 2016 Posted August 18, 2016 Wow, I really, really wanted to laugh but besides the previously seen tailgating escapades I think it was the most poorly done (and unfunniest) of these so far. it could be that their family of sites has been bought and they're collapsing gawker.com. i feel like everyone there doesn't know their future after being purchased by univision this week.
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