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truth on hold

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BuffaloBud Veteran

BuffaloBud

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Small story about Clarke. I was fortunate to get into a number of Tavistock Cup events at Isleworth. I'm at the practice range watching everyone warm up. Someone notices a significant coffee stain on the front of Clarke's white pants. The air turned blue from all the cussing he let out. I zipped back to the house I was staying at and got one of those Tide stain pens, brought it back to the range, and gave it to Clarke's caddie. You'd thought I just handed Clarke a million dollars. Got a thank you, a big handshake, and a couple of signed things. Saw him on the course later in the day and pointed at me and gave me a big thumbs up - no / very little noticeable stain.

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Bullpen Veteran

Bullpen

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Hilarious story, but by all accounts Els is a pretty terrific guy.

Agreed, they're both probably decent guys. I just happened to be the only "official-looking person" around that they could direct their frustration at. The spot the USGA had me standing was up on a mound directly behind the tee box, so I was quite visible to everyone on the second hole.

 

Second thread jack alert:

 

The other one who got the maloik that week was Francesco Molinari. I'm up on top of my little knoll behind the tee box with the yellow paddles that indicate to the spotters down the fairway which way the tee shot is going, so they either know to get out of the way or get ready to mark the ball. Waving the paddles straight up and down means center cut drive in the middle of the fairway. Then you have slight left/right, more left/right and then dead left or dead right (aka: watch yer lips it's comin right at ya).

 

Molinari hits his shot and it and starting to fade a little left. (in my head:) Damn that's headin' a little left (indicate slight left)... nope that's going towards the waste bunkers (indicate a bit more left than originally planned)... awww hell no, that's headin for Palmetto Rd and my spotter is gonna get brained (holds paddle parallel to the ground meaning dead-ass left).

 

Molinari, understandably not pleased, reaches down to toss his broken tee aside or something and catches me out of the corner of his eye motioning dead left. Stands up and without saying anything but with his eyes, "you little emm-eff, son-of-a- bang, son-of-a-boom. Don't show me up with your stupid yellow paddles."

 

Again, not wanting to forfeit passes for the weekend, I politely hold my signal until I see the spotter is now marking the ball and signal the "all clear." I stare at him from behind my sunglasses thinking, "ya dumb guiny, I'm not the one who caught a case of the snap hooks on the second hole of the first day of the tournament. Go find your freakin' ball and take your medicine and try to salvage par."

 

Good times...

 

 

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BuffaloBud Veteran

BuffaloBud

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Agreed, they're both probably decent guys. I just happened to be the only "official-looking person" around that they could direct their frustration at. The spot the USGA had me standing was up on a mound directly behind the tee box, so I was quite visible to everyone on the second hole.

 

Second thread jack alert:

 

The other one who got the maloik that week was Francesco Molinari. I'm up on top of my little knoll behind the tee box with the yellow paddles that indicate to the spotters down the fairway which way the tee shot is going, so they either know to get out of the way or get ready to mark the ball. Waving the paddles straight up and down means center cut drive in the middle of the fairway. Then you have slight left/right, more left/right and then dead left or dead right (aka: watch yer lips it's comin right at ya).

 

Molinari hits his shot and it and starting to fade a little left. (in my head:) Damn that's headin' a little left (indicate slight left)... nope that's going towards the waste bunkers (indicate a bit more left than originally planned)... awww hell no, that's headin for Palmetto Rd and my spotter is gonna get brained (holds paddle parallel to the ground meaning dead-ass left).

 

Molinari, understandably not pleased, reaches down to toss his broken tee aside or something and catches me out of the corner of his eye motioning dead left. Stands up and without saying anything but with his eyes, "you little emm-eff, son-of-a- bang, son-of-a-boom. Don't show me up with your stupid yellow paddles."

 

Again, not wanting to forfeit passes for the weekend, I politely hold my signal until I see the spotter is now marking the ball and signal the "all clear." I stare at him from behind my sunglasses thinking, "ya dumb guiny, I'm not the one who caught a case of the snap hooks on the second hole of the first day of the tournament. Go find your freakin' ball and take your medicine and try to salvage par."

 

Good times...

 

Good story
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truth on hold All Pro

truth on hold

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Can't believe how poorly spieth played 18. Bad tee shot OK, everybody hits them. But the 3 putt for double bogey, especially the first one came up 10 ft short? Now a bunch of guys are back in with a chance. How is it these guys are champions? Call him what you want , but tiger never did that

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eball Hall of Famer

eball

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Can't believe how poorly spieth played 18. Bad tee shot OK, everybody hits them. But the 3 putt for double bogey, especially the first one came up 10 ft short? Now a bunch of guys are back in with a chance. How is it these guys are champions? Call him what you want , but tiger never did that

 

Comparing anyone to Tiger in his prime (except maybe Jack in his prime) is a pointless exercise. What we saw Tiger do from '97 through '08 is something we are unlikely to ever see again. And no, I never saw Tiger do that.

 

That said -- there are some terrific golfers out there, and it should be a great Sunday. I like Spieth, but I'm kind of glad he had that mini blowup because it brought a lot more guys into the fold, including Langer (who I have to imagine just about everyone is rooting for).

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KD in CA Hall of Famer

KD in CA

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Yeah. I saw that. No wonder he tanked in the final round. :death:

 

He shot Miro Satan!

 

The Spieth collapse was hard to believe. That chunk into the water on 12 was one of the worst mental breakdowns I've ever seen. I'd never have expected it from a guy like him.

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26CornerBlitz Hall of Famer

26CornerBlitz

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He shot Miro Satan!

 

The Spieth collapse was hard to believe. That chunk into the water on 12 was one of the worst mental breakdowns I've ever seen. I'd never have expected it from a guy like him.

 

One rinse on twelve was a total surprise, but the second was a complete shock. Spieth is usually such a mental rock.

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Jauronimo Hall of Famer

Jauronimo

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I put the maloik on him back in the summer of 2014. I was working as a spotter on hole # 2 at the US Open. Part of my job, as we were working on a par five with a fairway crosswalk, was to signal to the marshalls down the fairway when to close the ropes so no one else would walk into the fairway while players were preparing to hitting their tee shots.

 

Darren Clarke, Els and Louis Oosthuizen finish on No 1 and I hold up the signal paddles to tell the marshalls to close the ropes. Just as Clarke puts his tee in the ground a group of three duck under the ropes and start across the fairway. Ol' Smiley Clarke turns around and stares at me along with Els (Louis seemed unfazed). Els says (paraphrasing) "C'mon man do your job. Get the ropes closed." Not wanting to forfeit my passes for the rest of the tournament, I say nothing but I sarcastically put the signal up again to close the ropes while security escorts the fans off the course.

 

I put the jinx on Els and Clarke that day and just like that, the yips rear its ugly head.

 

... that or I had absolutely nothing to do with this? :lol:

You nailed him right in the f@#$ing head, Bullpen. Right in his mind!

 

NSFW (unless you're me)

 

https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/3c3f2c42-cc4c-41ce-be79-3d12bedbb15c

Edited by Jauronimo
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Jauronimo Hall of Famer

Jauronimo

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@AustinKarp

CBS draws 8.5 overnight rating for final round of The Masters, -11% from Spieth's win last year, but +9% from Bubba Watson win in 2014

 

@richarddeitsch

Richard Deitsch Retweeted Austin Karp

Really emphasizes just how amazing Tiger Woods was in drawing eyeballs.

 

There are a lot of people who don't care much about golf but are pretty big Tiger fans. Tiger pulls butts and puts casual ass in the seats or something. I'm not good with expressions.

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KD in CA Hall of Famer

KD in CA

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There are a lot of people who don't care much about golf but are pretty big Tiger fans. Tiger pulls butts and puts casual ass in the seats or something. I'm not good with expressions.

Tiger definitely pulls a lot of butt.

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