Chef Jim Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 There are always break ins up in our neighborhood in the hills about Oakland so I got fed up and sent the mayor an email. In the email I complained that we get zero police patrols up in our neighborhoods. I'm said I was tired of the amount of attention they give to the flatlands and what are they going to do to protect their biggest tax payers. Well I get a response from one cop who says he's a watch commander, he felt my pain and was going to start sending patrols up to our area. Good right? Sure but then I asked how he got my email. He said I cc'd EVERY cop in Oakland. This is the one time I could probably use some advice.
DC Tom Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 There are always break ins up in our neighborhood in the hills about Oakland so I got fed up and sent the mayor an email. In the email I complained that we get zero police patrols up in our neighborhoods. I'm said I was tired of the amount of attention they give to the flatlands and what are they going to do to protect their biggest tax payers. Well I get a response from one cop who says he's a watch commander, he felt my pain and was going to start sending patrols up to our area. Good right? Sure but then I asked how he got my email. He said I cc'd EVERY cop in Oakland. This is the one time I could probably use some advice. Thanks for asking for advice, but you don't need any advice.
Dante Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 There are always break ins up in our neighborhood in the hills about Oakland so I got fed up and sent the mayor an email. In the email I complained that we get zero police patrols up in our neighborhoods. I'm said I was tired of the amount of attention they give to the flatlands and what are they going to do to protect their biggest tax payers. Well I get a response from one cop who says he's a watch commander, he felt my pain and was going to start sending patrols up to our area. Good right? Sure but then I asked how he got my email. He said I cc'd EVERY cop in Oakland. This is the one time I could probably use some advice. Move? Maybe your business doesn't make it easy for you I don't know. Personally I wouldn't want to live that close to Oakland. I feel more comfortable on the other side of the mountains east.
4BillsintheBurgh Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 There are always break ins up in our neighborhood in the hills about Oakland so I got fed up and sent the mayor an email. In the email I complained that we get zero police patrols up in our neighborhoods. I'm said I was tired of the amount of attention they give to the flatlands and what are they going to do to protect their biggest tax payers. Well I get a response from one cop who says he's a watch commander, he felt my pain and was going to start sending patrols up to our area. Good right? Sure but then I asked how he got my email. He said I cc'd EVERY cop in Oakland. This is the one time I could probably use some advice. Sell the email list to a spammer. And don't do anything illegal in the front yard.
4merper4mer Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 There are always break ins up in our neighborhood in the hills about Oakland so I got fed up and sent the mayor an email. In the email I complained that we get zero police patrols up in our neighborhoods. I'm said I was tired of the amount of attention they give to the flatlands and what are they going to do to protect their biggest tax payers. Well I get a response from one cop who says he's a watch commander, he felt my pain and was going to start sending patrols up to our area. Good right? Sure but then I asked how he got my email. He said I cc'd EVERY cop in Oakland. This is the one time I could probably use some advice. Send another email. Text below, feel free to cut and paste: And another thing. Just how does some schmoe like me get his hands on a distribution list that includes the email of every cop in Oakland? What is that department's IT department so insecure that they should be running Hillary's server or something? I guess it shouldn't surprise me that a department that does no patrols at all also has no email security. Maybe I should just call the donut shop if something happens in my neighborhood. It would save time. Or: We are Anonymous. We hacked Chef Jim's email. Chef Jim loves every cop in Oakland. We are Anonymous.
BuffaloBill Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 Put one of those face covering hats with the eye holes over your head preferably a black one. Then dress up in black and at night walk through your area yards and streets. When you eventually meet one of the cops you emailed yell at them and tell them that you don't need their advice.
4merper4mer Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 "Accidentally" cc the cops again when you write the mayor back telling him everything is all better now.
Beerball Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 Forwarded this to your wife. Hope you don't mind.
BuffaloBill Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 Go get yourself a red hoodie. Or a blue one...
Beerball Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 Pardon me for asking what may be an inappropriate question. After you're unfortunate & early demise would you mind if I date your widow? I know that you have planned well for your future and since you don't have one it only seems right that someone is there to enjoy it; might as well be me.
Bullpen Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 (edited) Thanks for asking for advice, but you don't need any advice. ^^^^^^^^ This should have closed the thread right then and there! I would reply back saying every cop on this list is entitle to one free appetizer at my restaurant for doing such a whiz-bang job protecting our streets! (Then in fine print type "limit one per badge number offer good March 14 through Apr 30 from 3 pm to 3:30 pm.") Edited March 11, 2016 by Bullpen
Gugny Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 Pardon me for asking what may be an inappropriate question. After you're unfortunate & early demise would you mind if I date your widow? I know that you have planned well for your future and since you don't have one it only seems right that someone is there to enjoy it; might as well be me. Thank you for reminding me ... I get the Egg.
Beerball Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 Thank you for reminding me ... I get the Egg. You'll have to take that up with my future wife.
Beerball Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 You'll have to take that up with my future wife. OK, so we talked and Gugny doesn't get the egg. The future Mrs. BB wants it to go to someone with some culinary talent. We did agree tough that Gugny does get Chef's collection of food porn.
Chef Jim Posted March 11, 2016 Author Posted March 11, 2016 You'll have to take that up with my future wife. I'm not even dead yet and you're already talking about my wife's eggs? BTW here's an updated email I got from Watch Commander Arotzarena. I think I'm cool. Good Morning Jim, I sent some guys last night, and will be sending more today. But I think the rain is on our crime fighting side today. You didn’t piss anyone off, but I am pissed no one else responded. This department is very young. Me on the other hand, 26 years and 3 more! Yes to the coffee and ill buy. I’ll keep you posted if we get anything. One of my officers will be monitoring stop sign on your street, tell all your friends. Dom
Beerball Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 I'm not even dead yet and you're already talking about my wife's eggs? BTW here's an updated email I got from Watch Commander Arotzarena. I think I'm cool. Good Morning Jim, I sent some guys last night, and will be sending more today. But I think the rain is on our crime fighting side today. You didn’t piss anyone off, but I am pissed no one else responded. This department is very young. Me on the other hand, 26 years and 3 more! Yes to the coffee and ill buy. I’ll keep you posted if we get anything. One of my officers will be monitoring stop sign on your street, tell all your friends. Dom **** !@#$ damn
\GoBillsInDallas/ Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 I think that the cops already know who you are, given the amount of porn you've been downloading all these years.
BuffaloBill Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 Dividing up the spoils of death is the second oldest occupation
Deranged Rhino Posted March 11, 2016 Posted March 11, 2016 I'm not even dead yet and you're already talking about my wife's eggs? BTW here's an updated email I got from Watch Commander Arotzarena. I think I'm cool. Good Morning Jim, I sent some guys last night, and will be sending more today. But I think the rain is on our crime fighting side today. You didn’t piss anyone off, but I am pissed no one else responded. This department is very young. Me on the other hand, 26 years and 3 more! Yes to the coffee and ill buy. I’ll keep you posted if we get anything. One of my officers will be monitoring stop sign on your street, tell all your friends. Dom Does your wife know you're going on a coffee date with a 26 year old cop? (Or does he have 26 years on the job? Either way, it's cute Jim has a date!)
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