Johnny Hammersticks Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 By the way, my 4-year old daughter is well-behaved in restaurants, but there have been times where she has unexpectently lost it. I seem to recall her strewn across the floor of a cracker barrel when she was 2 years old. And when you have 2 other babies and food to deal with, as well as limited discplinary options, you try your best to handle it. Yeah, and if you can't handle it you ask to have your food packed up/order cancelled, and then you take your kids home. Impolite, IMO, to let your kid throw a fit in a restaurant and ruin everyone else's meal. So you have the wherewithal to bring snacks, but you let an unfamiliar junkie into your house for showers. I was familiar with the junkie. He was my neighbor.
Gugny Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 I was familiar with the junkie. He was my neighbor. Don't bore me with details, Hammersticks.
Flutie Flakes Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 I agree. 3 pancakes, for crying out loud. What kind of place is this? By the way, I side entirely with the parents on this. This is a freaking diner, not a 4-star restaurant. There is an expectation that a toddler may lose it, and no matter what the parents do, there is sometimes nothing you can do about it to stop it. That's why you bring your little kids to a diner (or Applebee's or Chic Filet), and not to Morton's Steakhouse. By the way, my 4-year old daughter is well-behaved in restaurants, but there have been times where she has unexpectently lost it. I seem to recall her strewn across the floor of a cracker barrel when she was 2 years old. And when you have 2 other babies and food to deal with, as well as limited discplinary options, you try your best to handle it. Regardless of whether it is a 4-star restaurant or a diner, the point is that there are other patrons not to mention employees that do not want to witness or listen to tantrums while they are eating. Pick up the kid and take him or her outside if they are inconsolable. If you have to box up your food, so be it and next time consider take out as an option or leaving them home with a babysitter. It's about being respectful of others, not to mention that there may be people out there that can't afford a 4-star restaurant and there special night out might be at a diner, Cracker Barrel, etc. Both of my kids learned from an early age that it was a special treat to go out to eat and we set clear expectations that they always needed to behave in ANY restaurant. They could color, draw or sit down for this....carry on a conversation with my wife and I while we waited for our food. There were only a few occasions that I recall where one might have acted up. The next time we went out, he stayed home with the babysitter while his brother got to go out. When we got home, the one that went made it a point to tell his brother all about how good his dinner and dessert were while the one that stayed home got pb & j.
Chef Jim Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 I was at a restaurant last year. A young child started to be difficult. Not scream, yell or bawl just the beginning of that. Dad looked her right in the eyes and said "you stop in 5 seconds or you're going outside. 5.....4.....3....." That's as far as he got and she was perfect the rest of the meal. A process that appears to work wonders with that family.
GG Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 I agree. 3 pancakes, for crying out loud. What kind of place is this? By the way, I side entirely with the parents on this. This is a freaking diner, not a 4-star restaurant. There is an expectation that a toddler may lose it, and no matter what the parents do, there is sometimes nothing you can do about it to stop it. That's why you bring your little kids to a diner (or Applebee's or Chic Filet), and not to Morton's Steakhouse. By the way, my 4-year old daughter is well-behaved in restaurants, but there have been times where she has unexpectently lost it. I seem to recall her strewn across the floor of a cracker barrel when she was 2 years old. And when you have 2 other babies and food to deal with, as well as limited discplinary options, you try your best to handle it. Just because this place has the word "diner" in its name doesn't make it a diner. Sure looks like an take on traditional diner food in a small, upscale setting. The owner's reaction certainly adds to the uptight nature of the place. I was at a restaurant last year. A young child started to be difficult. Not scream, yell or bawl just the beginning of that. Dad looked her right in the eyes and said "you stop in 5 seconds or you're going outside. 5.....4.....3....." That's as far as he got and she was perfect the rest of the meal. A process that appears to work wonders with that family. You mean he was being a parent?
Chef Jim Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 You mean he was being a parent? Well I'm not a parent so I may not be in a position to comment but if pressed my answer is....yuuup.
Gugny Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 I was at a restaurant last year. A young child started to be difficult. Not scream, yell or bawl just the beginning of that. Dad looked her right in the eyes and said "you stop in 5 seconds or you're going outside. 5.....4.....3....." That's as far as he got and she was perfect the rest of the meal. A process that appears to work wonders with that family. I never like to hear a parent threaten to, "go outside." I'm sure I'm in the very lucky minority, but we never once had an issue with our son misbehaving in public. It certainly wasn't accomplished by fear.
The Poojer Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 "go outside" doesn't mean getting spanked or anything, simply means to leave, dear lord, if i didn't have threats like that my kids would have had me hogtied and running around in their underwear in public I never like to hear a parent threaten to, "go outside." I'm sure I'm in the very lucky minority, but we never once had an issue with our son misbehaving in public. It certainly wasn't accomplished by fear.
Gugny Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 "go outside" doesn't mean getting spanked or anything, simply means to leave, dear lord, if i didn't have threats like that my kids would have had me hogtied and running around in their underwear in public I guess it's how it's framed - and how it's interpreted. What I was talking about is when it's CLEARLY a threat to go outside and get hit in some fashion. And I employ threats with my son; more now than when he was young enough to act up in public. But they're never threats of getting hit. Don't get me wrong, I've hit my son. He's been spanked and he's gotten more than one swat in the mouth. But not in his toddler years.
Chef Jim Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 I guess it's how it's framed - and how it's interpreted. What I was talking about is when it's CLEARLY a threat to go outside and get hit in some fashion. And I employ threats with my son; more now than when he was young enough to act up in public. But they're never threats of getting hit. Don't get me wrong, I've hit my son. He's been spanked and he's gotten more than one swat in the mouth. But not in his toddler years. I was framed very respectfully and my understanding is that he meant we're just going outside to you don't disrupt the other diners. He was calm and quiet. And it looked to be interpreted as the kid thinking "if I have a choice between staying here or going outside I'm staying here and that requires I'll behave." A good relationship.
Gugny Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 I was framed very respectfully and my understanding is that he meant we're just going outside to you don't disrupt the other diners. He was calm and quiet. And it looked to be interpreted as the kid thinking "if I have a choice between staying here or going outside I'm staying here and that requires I'll behave." A good relationship. Yep. I totally misinterpreted. And I agree that it was good parenting.
plenzmd1 Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 "go outside" doesn't mean getting spanked or anything, simply means to leave, dear lord, if i didn't have threats like that my kids would have had me hogtied and running around in their underwear in public I did not think it was implied getting hit either...good lord Chef, what is the prison sentence in Berkerly for spanking a child, ? My kids were not little paragons of great civility and manners at 2 and 3...we had plenty of times of walking outside till they got their chit together and were not being a disruption to others. BTW, i am still fascinated by the pancake thing...went to the website..this is a breakfast/lunch only place, pancakes are a main staple of the menu...i am very confused
Wayne Cubed Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 Counting works on my 2-year old and I have no idea why. We've never spanked her but if she's having a melt down, the counting calms her down even though there aren't any consequences once the counting stop. And she knows daddy means business.
BillsFanNC Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 All parties involved in this story, save the two year old, are idiots.
Johnny Hammersticks Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 But, as I am sure you know, it only takes a split second to see your kid blow up. I would never let my kid cry for 40 minutes straight (nor do I think the parents at this diner did, despite the contrary report)-- but I doubt I would leave a restaurant over a 5-minute incident. Of course. I wouldn't drag my kid out of a restaurant for a 5 minute "incident." I would, however, leave the restaurant if my child was screaming and carrying on after a couple attempts at redirection. Fortunately, I have never had to do this. By the way, I have seen this in some other restaurants. Kids getting fussy due to long wait; waitress or owner brings the kids some free fruit snack to help diffuse the situation. Everyone is happy. I did this all the time as a waiter. It's amazing what a little cup of maraschino cherries can do (for my tip as well).
Chef Jim Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 (edited) I did not think it was implied getting hit either...good lord Chef, what is the prison sentence in Berkerly for spanking a child, ? No prison sentence in Berzerkely for hitting a child. Touch someone's dog? Holy hell to pay. BTW we were all angels the rare time we went out with mom and dad. Not sure what they did to instill the respect in us. I think it was the fear of being physically reprimanded. Our parents never hit us other than a much deserved spanking but the fact that they could always loomed large. Now kids, for the most part, have no fear. Edited July 21, 2015 by Chef Jim
Chef Jim Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 Of course. I wouldn't drag my kid out of a restaurant for a 5 minute "incident." I would, however, leave the restaurant if my child was screaming and carrying on after a couple attempts at redirection. Fortunately, I have never had to do this. Well you should. I five minute incident is an eternity to folks like us trying to enjoy a meal together. And let me ask you. Once the incident starts how to you know it's only going to last 5 minutes?
Johnny Hammersticks Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 Well you should. I five minute incident is an eternity to folks like us trying to enjoy a meal together. And let me ask you. Once the incident starts how to you know it's only going to last 5 minutes? An incident like throwing knives at other customers and screaming, or an incident like a little pouting and foot stomping?
plenzmd1 Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 Berzerkely...too freaking funny! Kids are kids...someone who says their two year old is perfectly behaved is just a flat out liar or they filling the kid with Benadryl before they head out. I am not saying saying 2 year olds don't have outings that are perfect...just saying two year olds are two year olds. We took ours out, for dinner , a lot..albeit much earlier than civilized people eat.and if they acted up we took them away till they calmed . If that meant my beer got warm and my app got cold...well, thats the price of doing business. We also left em home with a sitter at least one night a week so we could eat at a proper time, enjoy 1 or 2 or 4 cocktails before dinner....and talk about how awful other kids were and others bad parenting skills
Johnny Hammersticks Posted July 21, 2015 Posted July 21, 2015 Kids are kids. Some are more challenging than others. I have been fortunate to have two fairly well behaved kids, but I'm not going to pretend that there haven't been moments where I want to sell them to the gypsies. True story. Near the tail end of an epic flight from Syracuse to Fairbanks, AK my son (then 2) was losing his mind. We tried everything from music to toys to walking him up and down the aisle. He was seated next to me on my wife's lap and spontaneously slapped her across the face. Horrified, she handed him to me and I sat him on my lap. He then looked me in the eyes, slapped me in the face, and screamed Daddy d**k head!" It was took every fiber of my being to resist laughing.
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