DC Tom Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 I was...let's just say "peripherally involved with"...the systems at OPM that were recently hacked. Given the political blood bath going on over this, there is a miniscule chance that I might be called in front of Congress to testify. So I wanted to ask this question of the board: if I have to testify, what TDBisms should I work in to my testimony? "You're an idiot" is a given, of course (particularly given my contempt of Congresscritters). And I'll try to use "retatta." Any other suggestions? [Try to keep it non-political as much as possible, please. Mods, I ask some lenience for any political statements; I'd like suggestions from the wider board, not just PPP.] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BringBackFergy Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 If they start to grill you hard on the data breach, you can say: I learned one thing from this whole experience and the un-Godly amounts of money we spent on computer systems consultants....don't confuse effort with results. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jr1 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 use these teen slang terms http://stylecaster.com/the-most-popular-slang-terms-of-2015-animated/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guffalo Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 "It's hard to protect data in the the USA" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadian Bills Fan Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Ground up and in the freezer you should also be able to slip in "F5" no problem CBF Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrDawkinstein Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 (edited) It would be great if you could sneak any of these onto the record: "Russ Brandon must go" "Ralph is cheap" "Doooooooomed" "Asleep at the wheel" Edited June 17, 2015 by DrDareustein Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadian Bills Fan Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 "I'm so $#@ing done with this testimony" CBF Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4merper4mer Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 It is congress so you had better be serious. Also try to boil it down to the most likely scenario and explain Occum's Shaver to them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jauronimo Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 discussion of moats as a means of data security and radiation containment changes in the gravitational constant due to geology the mean expected outcome of rolling a die do your own homework, Sue Exhibit B pixyland.org defer to the authority of El Pegual Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4merper4mer Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 If you sense that you're getting in trouble just apologize and tell them that it stems from a self of steam problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YoloinOhio Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 "Obviously" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Wear the T-shirt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4merper4mer Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Wear the T-shirt. Winner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alaska Darin Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 "telephone pole in New Jersey" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LB3 Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 The hack may or may not be attributable to the slow eyes of security personnel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
....lybob Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Argue incessantly that the word hacked is so vaguely defined that not only have the computers in question not been hacked but that no computers have ever been hacked. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YoloinOhio Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 The eye test Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chef Jim Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Have an idiot-athon. We each pledge a specific amount for every time you use the word idiot. I'm sure we can come up with a good cause. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DC Tom Posted June 17, 2015 Author Share Posted June 17, 2015 Have an idiot-athon. We each pledge a specific amount for every time you use the word idiot. I'm sure we can come up with a good cause. Point of note: I was planning on alternating "idiot" with "full gatorman." So you may want to combine them for pledge purposes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GG Posted June 17, 2015 Share Posted June 17, 2015 Winner Took that long too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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