Best Player Available Posted January 29, 2015 Posted January 29, 2015 Dear Diary, So happy Nate came to his senses and understands my leadership role we have experienced since our 'cuse days. So the dynamic duo, may just be reunited again. Love how Nate took my lead and cancels interviews unless like me we know it's a slam dunk offer. groundbreaking, innovative career building is what I call it. So, it may just be us guiding to Jags to a bigtime 8-8 season sometime this decade. As a QB coach he will showcase his QB development talents, the ones he perfected in Buffalo. It's all good now. maybe Nate didn't get the golden parachute like I did. But all in all a QB coach is a pretty cool gig. he gets his own cubicle too. Blake is peeing his pants with excitement. look out world If Nate and I pull this power move off. respectfully mine, St. Doug
ICanSleepWhenI'mDead Posted February 6, 2015 Posted February 6, 2015 (edited) 2/5/15 Dear diary, There is a perception out there that I quit on the Buffalo Bills. I don't agree with that. Those up-staters must not understand contracts. I take $4 million that I earned for making my family endure those winters while I performed a miracle, and the ingrates say I quit. The players and other coaches know that was just put out there. Ralph gets decades of a sweetheart stadium lease deal and takes tens of millions of local WNY tax dollars while living several states away basking in the Michigan sunshine. But does he take any heat for it? Obviously not when they have me to kick around for taking a measly $4 mill. If they don't like folks worth millions, they should still be bashing Ko Simpson. I didn't see him sticking around after he got his money. I repeat - - I did not quit - - I merely OPTED OUT. Leaders of men throughout history have been crucified for opting out by peons who simply never had any options to make choices. When King George opted out of taxing the colonies for drinking Starbucks, people said he quit. When Lee opted out of Sherman's march to the sea, people said he quit. When the Dodge brothers opted out of making the Edsel, people said they quit. But you know what? King George, Robert E. Lee and the Dodge brothers were all great leaders of men, and every last one was misunderstood. If you don't plan to have options, you wind up like General Custard. Now there's a guy who wishes he had my foursight to negotiate an opt-out. I bet history books written by sheep will even say Roberto ("No Mas") Duran quit during his fight with Sugar Ray. The man had options, and after assessing the situation, he chose to exercise the best one. That's what real leaders do, even if they're not American! It's lonely at the top, but I'll continue to lead so others like Nate can follow or at least get out of the way. Obviously humble, Grand Imperial Poobah Doug Edited February 6, 2015 by ICanSleepWhenI'mDead
The Real Buffalo Joe Posted March 11, 2015 Posted March 11, 2015 Dear Diary, Worked another miracle today. Got Julius Thomas to sign with us. Obviously it was all me. I mean, they won't let me talk to him, or even look him in the eye. Don't blame them though. I wouldn't want him to be intimidated too soon and leave after meeting Two-Time Pinstripe Bowl Champion Doug Marrone. Gotta run. That coffee pot isn't gonna fill itself. Obviously Obvious, St. Doug Marrone Esq.
eball Posted March 11, 2015 Posted March 11, 2015 Dear Diary -- Yesterday was the worst day of my life. Lee Smith has signed with the Oakland Raiders, and instead I'm stuck with a schmuck like Julius Thomas who only wants to catch passes and score touchdowns. All of my plans for Jacksonville have been ruined. I might just quit. Obviously yours, Doug
BillsFan-4-Ever Posted March 11, 2015 Posted March 11, 2015 (edited) Dear Diary -- It's been 2 months and 3 days.... They are laughing at me more and more every day. All of my plans for Jacksonville have been ruined with the slight hope that we can trade for Drew Brees. If not I might just cry. Sincerely yours, Doug Edited March 11, 2015 by BillsFan-4-Ever
The Real Buffalo Joe Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 (edited) Yo Diary, It's me. Saint Doug again. I ain't written nothing in a while because I've been really busy with recruiting and junk. So when I go back and play the ills (That's a joke diary, because they're called the Bills, but they play like they're ill! (Didn't think you get that since I have such a high brow sense of humor.)), It'll be on the big stage in London. Sure, it's at 9 AM ET back home, but that's because they want us to be the first game of the day! They're not even putting it on TV, but online, so that everybody can see me. I just hope that the servers don't shut down from everybody trying to log on at the same time. Gotta go now, those coffee pots won't fill themselves. Obviously yours, Dr, Saint Douglas Charles Marrone Esq. Edited May 1, 2015 by The Real Buffalo Joe
BringBackFergy Posted August 18, 2015 Author Posted August 18, 2015 Dear Diary - Ya see? Ya see? People really do like me. I knew it wouldn't be long before others see the value I bring to a team. All of my football knowledge and offensive line play will bring a ray of light to the Jags. I'm going to keep this article handy in case I interview for the head coaching job next year. This will show them. Ohhhhh, and the Bills can kiss my ass!! Incognito? Bahahahah Miller at Guard?? That kid is a right tackle. What a bunch of morons. Seantrel Henderson? I taught him everything he knows. They'll be lost without me. Fondly yours....obviously, Offensive Line Coach Doug Marrone Jacksonville Jaguars: Doug Marrone critical for success by Luke Sims 2w ago TWEET SHARE 0 COMMENTS Jacksonville Jaguars offensive line coach Doug Marrone gets a lot of love from me these days. I loved the hire when it was announced this offseason and I think he may have a bigger hand in success for the Jaguars than pretty much any other offseason addition. He’s just the offensive line coach, but that was a key area for growth this offseason and the Jacksonville Jaguars couldn’t have found anyone better to do it. He’s had a couple of top-five offenses during his time as offensive coordinator with the New Orleans Saints, he had a top-two rushing offense with the 6-10 Buffalo Bills in 2013, and his head coaching gig at Syracuse had plenty of positive offensive moments as well. Sponsored: 2 Point Lead So when we talk about Marrone being an important addition to the Jacksonville Jaguars, it’s because he has a track record of motivating teams to achieve offensive success. Sometimes, like with the Bills and Syracuse, it doesn’t always translate to wins. Fortunately for Marrone, the win/loss record doesn’t fall on him. That falls to Gus Bradley. All that Marrone must do is improve that offensive line, especially with the Jagaurs’ emphasis on the running game going forward. With three key new additions all with the chance to start at left guard, center, and right tackle, Marrone will have plenty of talent on his offensive line to craft it as he wishes. It could be like the dominant run blocking group from 2008 with a +120 grade from Pro Football Focus or, more likely, we’ll see a positive trend. The Jaguars were graded -32 and -28.8 in pass protection and run blocking in 2014, respectively. For 2013, the Jags were -17 in pass protection and a league-worst -80 in run blocking (almost twice as bad as the next-worst New York Jets) according to PFF. Recovering from that recent abysmal history is going to be hard. It’s critical for Blake Bortles to have steady blocking in front of him. It’s critical for T.J. Yeldon to have holes opening in front of him. Doug Marrone’s job is critical to success for the Jacksonville Jaguars offense. If Marrone can’t do his job, he’s not worth keeping around. I think he can get it done and I think that we’ll see positive impacts from his coaching during his first year crafting the new-look offensive line. No matter where the PFF grades shake out, it will be important to see how much time Bortles will have in the pocket and how big those holes are for Yeldon to sneak through.
Mike in Horseheads Posted August 18, 2015 Posted August 18, 2015 Dear Diary - Ya see? Ya see? People really do like me. I knew it wouldn't be long before others see the value I bring to a team. All of my football knowledge and offensive line play will bring a ray of light to the Jags. I'm going to keep this article handy in case I interview for the head coaching job next year. This will show them. Ohhhhh, and the Bills can kiss my ass!! Incognito? Bahahahah Miller at Guard?? That kid is a right tackle. What a bunch of morons. Seantrel Henderson? I taught him everything he knows. They'll be lost without me. Fondly yours....obviously, Offensive Line Coach Doug Marrone Jacksonville Jaguars: Doug Marrone critical for success by Luke Sims 2w ago TWEET SHARE 0 COMMENTS Jacksonville Jaguars offensive line coach Doug Marrone gets a lot of love from me these days. I loved the hire when it was announced this offseason and I think he may have a bigger hand in success for the Jaguars than pretty much any other offseason addition. He’s just the offensive line coach, but that was a key area for growth this offseason and the Jacksonville Jaguars couldn’t have found anyone better to do it. He’s had a couple of top-five offenses during his time as offensive coordinator with the New Orleans Saints, he had a top-two rushing offense with the 6-10 Buffalo Bills in 2013, and his head coaching gig at Syracuse had plenty of positive offensive moments as well.Sponsored: 2 Point Lead So when we talk about Marrone being an important addition to the Jacksonville Jaguars, it’s because he has a track record of motivating teams to achieve offensive success. Sometimes, like with the Bills and Syracuse, it doesn’t always translate to wins. Fortunately for Marrone, the win/loss record doesn’t fall on him. That falls to Gus Bradley. All that Marrone must do is improve that offensive line, especially with the Jagaurs’ emphasis on the running game going forward. With three key new additions all with the chance to start at left guard, center, and right tackle, Marrone will have plenty of talent on his offensive line to craft it as he wishes. It could be like the dominant run blocking group from 2008 with a +120 grade from Pro Football Focus or, more likely, we’ll see a positive trend. The Jaguars were graded -32 and -28.8 in pass protection and run blocking in 2014, respectively. For 2013, the Jags were -17 in pass protection and a league-worst -80 in run blocking (almost twice as bad as the next-worst New York Jets) according to PFF. Recovering from that recent abysmal history is going to be hard. It’s critical for Blake Bortles to have steady blocking in front of him. It’s critical for T.J. Yeldon to have holes opening in front of him. Doug Marrone’s job is critical to success for the Jacksonville Jaguars offense. If Marrone can’t do his job, he’s not worth keeping around. I think he can get it done and I think that we’ll see positive impacts from his coaching during his first year crafting the new-look offensive line. No matter where the PFF grades shake out, it will be important to see how much time Bortles will have in the pocket and how big those holes are for Yeldon to sneak through. Somebody loved Hitler, Charles Manson and Bin Laden too St Doug, hang in there.
Canadian Bills Fan Posted August 18, 2015 Posted August 18, 2015 August 18th, 2015 Dear Diary, It appears that I am half way through this so I think I am going to take this opportunity and opt out See ya D CBF
BringBackFergy Posted August 18, 2015 Author Posted August 18, 2015 August 18th, 2015 Dear Diary, It appears that I am half way through this so I think I am going to take this opportunity and opt out See ya D CBF
The Real Buffalo Joe Posted August 18, 2015 Posted August 18, 2015 (edited) Yo Diary, Dougie again. That fat ass Rex Ryan thinks he can whip the Bills into shape. Those morons don't even wear the right socks to practice! Obviously, they're going nowhere. Seems sports writing legend Luke Sims thinks Doug is the real deal. About damn time. He forgot to mention Doug also being assistant head coach, but that's ok. We all know my real passion is the offensive line, that's why I fixed it up in Buffalo, and left. I'm like their Mary Friggin' Poppins. Anyway, diary, gotta go pick up Gus' dry cleaning. Tell Rex good luck beating that Grappalo kid, Obviously I'm the only one that can do it. Also, being the last head coach to beat the Patriots, obviously their cheating didn't affect me Obviously yours, The Good Reverend St. Douglas Charles Marrone PhD. Edited August 18, 2015 by The Real Buffalo Joe
Delete This Account Posted August 19, 2015 Posted August 19, 2015 (edited) Dear Diary: Gregg Williams has contacted me, and we've exchanged pleasantries regarding our experiences in Western New York, and how the Bills failed each of us by refusing to appreciate how big of an impact we've made on football. Gregg, of course, says he's still a big deal, but secretly I know I'm bigger. That said, I let him buy me a wine spritzer just to make him feel better. And, oh boy, did we ever wind up tying one on. He said he fully expected the Bills to go 19-0 in 2002, and I one-upped him by saying we went 54-0 in 2014, and in the midst of a snowstorm and earthquake and tsunami that paralyzed Buffalo, while I spent time delivering 12 babies -- all named Doug, even the GIRLS! -- at the local hospital. Gregg responded by saying he once tried a buffalo chicken wing at Frank Astors and I failed to have a response. Does that make me inferior? Worried Doug "FIRPA" M. ps: Nate keeps shooting me dirty looks. i chalk this up to envy, but i plan to smooth this out by suggesting he should thank me for giving him an opportunity. And an autographed Syracuse beer cozy should do the trick. Edited August 19, 2015 by john wawrow
snafu Posted August 19, 2015 Posted August 19, 2015 Dear diary, I'm going to sit on Kromer's beach tonight and see what happens. D.M.
papazoid Posted August 19, 2015 Posted August 19, 2015 dear diary, i'm having second thoughts. maybe i should have accepted the bills extension offer. maybe i'm an idiot. but on the other hand, marcel said i was always miserable, tense, anal and cared about little stupid things. he just doesn't understand the importance of team issued socks for practice. then the bills didn't even mention me once in their Bills Year in Review video after i single handedly led them to 9 wins, those ungrateful bastards. besides, jumping out of airplanes, taking your team golfing in lieu of practice and having so called star power is a waste of time. nope, i did the right thing for me. i am a winner. yours obviously, doug
BringBackFergy Posted September 17, 2015 Author Posted September 17, 2015 (edited) September 17, 2015 Dear Diary - I obviously made a mistake, ok? It's obviously something we can all learn from, ok? Yeah I took $4 million and walked away, ok? Yeah, I took a job in Jacksonville where the offensive line needed my assistance and professional touch, ok? I get it. It has sunk in now. But why the !@#$ did the Bills get to draft and buy all these !@#$ing good players after I left? That offensive line is coached by some rube named Kromer...If I was there, we would have run for over 200 yds. I'd get the band back together...me, Urbik, Pears, we'd dominate, ok? Now I have to coach Luke !@#$ing Jokel and some other scrubs. Sure we ran for 13 yds all game...but did you see the protection?? Ahhhhhhh !@#$!! I hate this job. I should have taken that spot at Petsmart when I had the offer. Will be in touch soon.... Obviously, Doug Edited September 17, 2015 by BringBackFergy
ricojes Posted September 17, 2015 Posted September 17, 2015 He quit writing in his diary about half way into it...
Captain Hindsight Posted September 18, 2015 Posted September 18, 2015 Dear Diary, Well the offensive line sucked this week. I asked for Cyrill Richardson when he went on waivers but Gus said no. Who does that guy even think he is? I'm getting paid by two franchises. One is even paying me not to coach! Lol! Anyway if I just had my awesome guards like Pears and Richardson, we would have had 850 yards rushing at least in the first quarter. How come everyone is so stupid? Oh well, none of this will matter when Nate and I are famous singers. Signed, Saint Doug
BuffaloBillsForever Posted September 21, 2015 Posted September 21, 2015 Dear Diary, I finally performed my final miracle with getting the Jaguars their 1st win of the season. Mr. Kahn just informed me that the Jaguars will be having a pre-game celebration of my canonization. The players will now have to refer to me as St. Doug or St. Marrone. I am so excited!!! If only Mr. Pegula saw my potential. I beat the Patriots. I am a way better headcoach than Rex. He even blamed the loss on himself...lol. This day couldn't have ended better. Obviously yours, St. Doug Future headcoach of the Jacksonville Jaguars
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