Security Posted October 20, 2014 Posted October 20, 2014 I would be careful with the gifts, then they expect something every time, that goes for women and children.
The Poojer Posted October 20, 2014 Posted October 20, 2014 common guys...y'all are slipping   Pics????
Jim in Anchorage Posted October 20, 2014 Posted October 20, 2014 common guys...y'all are slipping   Pics???? Of a 4 year old? You are getting worse by the day.
The Poojer Posted October 20, 2014 Posted October 20, 2014 i could tell my highly inappropriate joke here, but i don't want any warning points..... Â Â ......there's 20 of them!!! Â Of a 4 year old? You are getting worse by the day.
Jim in Anchorage Posted October 20, 2014 Posted October 20, 2014 i could tell my highly inappropriate joke here, but i don't want any warning points..... Â Â ......there's 20 of them!!! 20 warning points? Impressive.
ExiledInIllinois Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 (edited) Go visit PPP... They are all 2 year olds there... You are in for a world of hurt! Oh wait, you said 4 year old, not 2 year old. ;-P Â J/K... Didn't mean to scare you. You probably will have it a lot easier, this young lady will be 100 times more reasonable and less begruding! ;-) Â Best wishes! Â Â Â Ask her EJ or Orton. Â LoL... Then fax the response to Marrone! Â Probably better than the advice they are getting now! ;-P Edited October 21, 2014 by ExiledInIllinois
John Adams Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 (1) Focus all and every minute on her. That's what kids need. Â (2) Repeat #2 for the rest of your life. Â (3) Find the joy in 1 and 2. Â That is what you're taking on and it can be the opportunity of your life but never think differently or you will f$%^ up the kid.
KD in CA Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 I would be careful with the gifts, then they expect something every time, that goes for women and children. Â Agreed; I wouldn't start off with gifts. And if you do get something for an occasion, (i.e., Halloween), the smallest, simplest thing is just as special as a big toy to a 4 year old. Â You can plan to get her a real gift for Christmas is all is going well.
BillsFan-4-Ever Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 Kids respond well to structure and authority. You have to get off on the right foot with her immediately - let her know, in no uncertain terms, that you're the boss, and put her in her place, and don't put up with any crap from her. Tom you are slipping dude. No advice to say You're an idiot? Go visit PPP... They are all 2 year olds there... You are in for a world of hurt! Oh wait, you said 4 year old, not 2 year old. ;-P :worthy:
Doc Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 Agreed; I wouldn't start off with gifts. And if you do get something for an occasion, (i.e., Halloween), the smallest, simplest thing is just as special as a big toy to a 4 year old. Â You can plan to get her a real gift for Christmas is all is going well. I'd say meeting her for the first time is an "occasion." Just don't bring her gifts every time.
BillsFanM.D. Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 A 4-year old isn't very challenging. Be happy you're meeting her now and not when she's 8 (if you intend on keeping the mom around for a while). Â Crouch down; speak to her eye-to-eye, but keep some space so she's not intimidated. At first ask some basics; 'what's your name', 'how old are you', 'do you go to school', 'do you like Princess Elsa?' If she's shy right off the bat, hang back and let her come to you. If she's eager to interact, ask her any open ended question to get her chatting. My daughters that age will chat up any random person they come across. Be sure to exchange high-fives when you leave. Â Read this multiple times every day until you meet the child. Follow the outline. It's great advice IMHO.
IDBillzFan Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 For whatever this is worth, whether you know it or not, you have a pre-conceived notion of what constitutes good parenting. This will become more apparent to you when you see, in person, how your girlfriend treats her daughter. You may even find yourself questioning the mother's methods simply because that was not how you were raised. Â Do yourself a favor and keep your trap shut unless you're opening it to say something like "You're doing an amazing job with your daughter." Â Next, remember the only Steven Covey tip that ever mattered: seek first to understand, then to be understood. There are few things an adult can do to frustrate a child more than cut them off or interrupt them because you already know what they're going to say, and already have the answer. Â Lastly, while you theoretically won't be given any alone time with the daughter at first, remember these words, "Let me check with your mother first." Â Good luck. I hope this works.
Maury Ballstein Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 common guys...y'all are slipping   Pics????  Seriously, I almost made the first reply to this thread as "pics" but stopped myself.  Â
ricojes Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 (edited) A 4-year old isn't very challenging. Be happy you're meeting her now and not when she's 8 (if you intend on keeping the mom around for a while). Â Crouch down; speak to her eye-to-eye, but keep some space so she's not intimidated. At first ask some basics; 'what's your name', 'how old are you', 'do you go to school', 'do you like Princess Elsa?' If she's shy right off the bat, hang back and let her come to you. If she's eager to interact, ask her any open ended question to get her chatting. My daughters that age will chat up any random person they come across. Be sure to exchange high-fives when you leave. Just to expand on this a little. If you actually know something about Princess Elsa, it would go a long way and could get the conversation flowing. Personally I have no idea who that character is, maybe Frozen? Â Oh...and high fives, followed by a head rub, then ask who wants ice cream! That's from 2 and half Men, what every adult thinks a child likes... Edited October 21, 2014 by ricojes
Cugalabanza Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 Elsa is a queen. Her sister, Anna, is a princess. Â !@#$ing amateurs!
Nanker Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 Don't try to come on like you're her best friend. Just act naturally and let her warm up to you before you try engaging her in a lot of talk.
KD in CA Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 Elsa is a queen. Her sister, Anna, is a princess. Â !@#$ing amateurs! Â I was referring to pre-coronation, obviously.
mead107 Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 Bring her stickers. No glitter ones. Bills ones. And some girly ones.
Doc Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 OK, just cut through all the BS and ask your girlfriend what is/are the best way/ways to break the ice with her daughter. Trying to guess and flubbing it when there is no need to do that is a waste of energy and potentially a long-lasting relationship.
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