Jump to content

2014 Midterms


Recommended Posts

  • Replies 724
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

Posted Images

If you've never drawn blood using one of those you're not using it right.

 

Cutting yourself on this device is precisely what Bruce Hornsby was referring to when he wrote Mandoline Rain.

 

True story.

 

Know how I know it's true? John Oliver did a segment on it.

Edited by LABillzFan
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

 

Cutting yourself on this device is precisely what Bruce Hornsby was referring to when he wrote Mandoline Rain.

 

True story.

 

Know how I know it's true? John Oliver did a segment on it.

 

I was working in a hotel kitchen and saw one of my cooks run out the back door with his hand wrapped in a rag. Looked around the corner and saw the mandoline at his station. Yup knew I was going to be short a guy that night. BTW he was black. Mandolines are racist. Know how I know that? John Oliver didn't piece on it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was working in a hotel kitchen and saw one of my cooks run out the back door with his hand wrapped in a rag. Looked around the corner and saw the mandoline at his station. Yup knew I was going to be short a guy that night. BTW he was black. Mandolines are racist. Know how I know that? John Oliver didn't piece on it.

 

Years ago in a previous life I worked summers at a pig roast concession stand that traveled throughout NY and PA to summer fairs. We'd roast pigs on a giant rotisserie during the day, pull the meat and slice it at night. We'd shove the meat into a big tube that rested on the slicer where you'd usually put a ham or roast beef, cram it down with a glove-covered fist and slice until three pigs were cut up.

 

One day I ran out of pig and sliced right down to the knuckles. I took off the glove reluctantly, and my first instinct was to make sure I could bend my fingers, which I could do because that was how I saw the white fleshy knuckles pop up.

 

Ruined a couple of pounds of delicious pork in the process.

Edited by LABillzFan
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

 

Years ago in a previous life I worked summers at a pig roast concession stand that traveled throughout NY and PA to summer fairs. We'd roast pigs on a giant rotisserie during the day, pull the meat and slice it at night. We'd shove the meat into a big tube that rested on the slicer where you'd usually put a ham or roast beef, cram it down with a glove-covered fist and slice until three pigs were cut up.

 

One day I ran out of pig and sliced right down to the knuckles. I took off the glove reluctantly, and my first instinct was to make sure I could bend my fingers, which I could do because that was how I saw the white fleshy knuckles pop up.

 

Ruined a couple of pounds of delicious pork in the process.

 

I don't get your last sentence.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just because you know how doesn't mean you've not cut your finger off. If you've never drawn blood using one of those you're not using it right.

 

man, ain't that the truth. I spent several years working in a kitchen with one of those things, and it took me years to learn how to lacerate my hand properly before I finally gained the confidence to use one at home.

 

 

Know how I know it's true? John Oliver did a segment on it.

 

:lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Do you know and speak Mandarin? Better yet, can you play one?

When I lived in Chinatown in Philly, I played the occasional Mandarin. Sometimes they even had perfect pitch.

meanwhile back at the 2014 midterms thread...........................................................lol

 

 

Rich Baehr: Will Foreign Policy Be the Biggest Drag for Democrats This Year?

 

I dunno, there's a lot of competition for that slot..

:lol: Yeah, starting QB for Cleveland pales in comparison to this competition.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Democratic Senate Candidates Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff... Like Israel, Iraq, the Border...

 

Running for Senate is difficult. Sooner or later, you’ll get asked a question about an issue you haven’t researched. So you can try to wing it, as Kentucky Democrat Alison Lundergan Grimes did, and suggest that Israel’s Iron Dome anti-missile system protects the country from Hamas tunnels…

 

… or you can try the approach of Montana Democrat Amanda Curtis:

When asked her position on the situation in Iraq, Curtis told CNN, “Give me a little more time.” On the border crisis, “I’ll need more time, you know only 11 days ago I was painting my storm windows.”

 

Or, as that campaign memo for Georgia Democrat Michelle Nunn described her position on Israel, “TBD” (To Be Determined).

 

 

 

WAR ON WOMEN: House Dem Candidate Says Female GOP Opponent Never Had a ‘Real Job.’

 

 

 

 

Colorado Gov. Hickenlooper: If You Don’t Reelect Me, I’ll Let This Murderer Off Death Row

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Funniest thing I've read all day, do democrats actually believe this sh*t ?

 

"All Hope is Lost".............lol

 

BwOlVxaIIAEwaeb.jpg

 

 

Goldberg's response.............At this rate, next DCCC email headers will be "You Will Crap Your Pants!" & "Might As Well Kill Yourself Now."

 

 

 

.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Funniest thing I've read all day, do democrats actually believe this sh*t ?

 

"All Hope is Lost".............lol

 

BwOlVxaIIAEwaeb.jpg

 

 

Goldberg's response.............At this rate, next DCCC email headers will be "You Will Crap Your Pants!" & "Might As Well Kill Yourself Now."

 

 

 

.

 

Looks like a javascript madlib written by a child. Or gator

 

<Time_of_Day>,

<Important Person of Ascending Rank based upon previous failed solicitations: DNC Chair, Nancy Pelosi, Joe Biden, Barack Obama>

has <contact method> you for the <num_solicitations++> time this <solicitation_period>

 

That's because we're in such trouble. <boogeyman> and <politically_incorrect_group> are <scaryword_ending_in_ly> outspending us -- and we only have <next_solicitation> to respond.

 

If we <threatening_phrase> now, we <sound_desperate> until <next_target>.

 

The biggest fundraising deadline of the year is in <next_solicitation++>.

Edited by /dev/null
Link to comment
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...